Hey kids, it’s disclaimer time!!

Firstly, if you guys really are kids-stop reading now!! If you’re still reading, the authors are NOT responsible for any damages reading it may incur on your pure, innocent, virgin mind!!
This fan fiction work is a LEMON, meaning that in describes sexual acts of various shapes and sizes and levels of kinkiness. We also take no responsibility for damages incurred on people over the legal age to read and view pornographic material either, just in case...
*ahem*
Anyway, this is also a body-switching fan fic. If you are offended by people switching bodies, or scared by this frightening prospect, perhaps you should not read this fan fiction.
Also, we do not own the rights to Ranma ½, if we did, you’d hear about it on the news:
TWO COMPLETE PERVERTS PAY A TRILLION DOLLARS TO MAKE HENTAI MOVIE OUT OF POPULAR ANIME SERIES RANMA ½*
Until you see that headline in the paper, we do not own the rights to Ranma.

*-Hey, no amount of creative integrity would make someone turn down that much money!

The Nermia Shuffle
By JDHGamer and Comp-User

Chapter One: The Orange Venders

A van rolled down the normally automobile-less streets of Nermia. Nobody stopped to marvel at this strange and wonderful marvel of modern technology that had somehow entered their world as it came to a stop just outside the gates of Furikan High.

On the side of the van there was a logo that said: Dimi-Chan and Juton’s Sweet & Not Sour Genetically Engineered Oranges.

Coming out of the truck were two people, apparently Dimi-Chan and Juton themselves.

Dimi-Chan was a rather short Asian-looking girl who had dark-blue hair tied into pony tails. She was dressed in a somewhat retro-looking version of the Furikan High uniform.

Juton was comparatively tall compared to Dimi-Chan, about six feet exactly. He had brown hair cut like Harry Potter’s a goatee on his chin, and slightly hexagon-shaped glasses. As far as clothing, he wasn’t wearing anything too impressive, and aside from the height difference looked very plain when standing next to his significant other.

Dimi-Chan: This must be the place!!

SPLASH!

An old lady nearby was throwing water on her sidewalk and overshot a bit, hitting Juton, now Jutina-Chan, as his fiancé liked calling her.

In girl-form, she had somewhat longer pink-colored hair, which she would always tie into pig tails if she knew she would have to be like that for awhile. She didn’t exactly mind having the girl form-in fact, it wasn’t completely girl. Unlike Ranma, Juton had fallen in-well, rather-been pushed into the spring of drowned hermaphrodite. It did make for some kinky nights, she had to admit, but it was still irritating that she couldn’t just change back and forth by will instead of cold water. She finished fixing up her hair and joined Dimi-Chan to help set up the stand.

Meanwhile, school was just getting out. Ranma and Akane were walking out together, and they would’ve been holding hands if not for all the rivals who’d react to even this slightest sign of affection. After the failed wedding attempt, they’d managed to discretely go out on dates, usually failing and most of the time, they had to do these dates within the relative safety of the dojo. They’d gotten closer, and had made a resolution to try to get along better, in case their parents one day decided to try another wedding.

However, at school they had to keep up the act that they at least somewhat disliked each other and at most had a tentative friendship.

At any rate, they, like most everyone walking out of the school, noticed the rather large stand that had been set up at the gate, and were heading down there out of curiosity.

Dimi-Chan (whispering to Jutina): Now remember the list I gave you-and the pictures too. We don’t want to accidentally give the “special” ones to people not on the list. The consequences could be disastrous!

Jutina (whispering back): Won’t the results be disastrous anyway?

Dimi-Chan: Yeah, sure-but in a GOOD way-if you do your job right!

Jutina: Yes mistress.

Dimi-Chan: Good girl.

There was already a long line forming, and Ranma and Akane were about in the middle of it. Fortunately, it was quickly moving so in no time they are at the stand itself.

Jutina: Hello, how may I help you?

Ranma: Do you have orange juice?

Jutina: Nope.

Akane: Orange Juliouses?
Dimi-Chan: No, just oranges. And we’re having a half-off sale! Of course, meaning also that you only get half an orange. Hehe!

Akane: I could’ve sworn I saw a bunch of people with whole oranges walking away from the stand...

Jutina: Well, uh...

Dimi-Chan: We didn’t think we’d have this many customers, so we’ve started cutting the oranges into halves so we can at least give all the people who come here at least a taste of our fine oranges! We’ll be appropriately restocked tomorrow, so you can expect to get a whole orange then if you like our halves of one. Also, one half an orange per customer, please.

Ranma: So it’s true that they’re sweet but not sour?

Dimi-Chan: The sign on the side of our van isn’t false advertising, you know!

Akane: How much are they?

Dimi-Chan: 27 yen.

(Co-Writer Note: This is assuming that they’re charging the equivalent of 50 cents for a whole orange. I’m not sure what the standard price in America is for oranges, let alone how much they cost in Japan, plus you have to take into account that they probably sell them by the pound so that would require even more math-not my area of expertise, really. lol Anyway, thanks to xe.com for it’s online currency converter)

Akane: Okay.

She pays for both her and Ranma’s orange halves.

Dimi-Chan: Oh, and please, don’t share-its not good for our business.

Ranma: Uh...okay.

As the two walked away, Dimi-Chan let out a sigh of relief.

Dimi-Chan: Let’s see, we’ve got Kuno, Nabiki, Kasumi, Ukyo, Shampoo, and just now Ranma and Akane. That leaves Happosai, Gosunkugi, and...

Ryouga: Excuse me, could you point me in the direction of Furikan High?

Dimi-Chan smiles

That night...

Dimi-Chan and Juton were packing up from the last point on their sales route.

Dimi-Chan: Well, unless one or more of them decided to not take our advice and share the orange halves, everything will go exactly as planned. Well have to see tomorrow.

Juton had found some warm water and was now back in guy-form.

Juton: Why are the whole oranges harmless when half an orange-

Dimi-Chan: Because a whole orange has both halves. When consumed by a single person, the effect is countered. Duh!

Juton: Oh yeah, that makes sense...I guess.

Around that same time, at the Tendo Dojo...

Akane: I think I’ll be...turning...in...early...tonight...

Ranma: Yeah...me...too...

Kasumi: Oh, my...I do think I will...too...I feel so...drowsy...

Before anybody could get to their beds, they all passed out on the floor...

The next morning...

The first thought that came to Ranma’s mind was that Akane hadn’t woken him up, and he might be late for school. The second thought was that, ‘Oh yeah, it’s a weekend’. The third thought was that he must’ve somehow been splashed with cold water, and that somehow his (her) ponytail had come undone because her hair was lose. The last thought before she fully woke up was noticing two things, #1: Her chest felt heavier than usual when in girl-form, and #2: That the senses in her skin seemed to be heightened, but maybe it was just her body waking up, but it didn’t feel like it.

As she tried to get up, she realized that her chest had definitely somehow gotten heavier. As she gathered her thoughts and analyzed the situation, she also realized that she isn’t wearing boxers...but...panties? Surely Happosai hadn’t snuck in and...

She pulled up her dress...wait...dress? Someone apparently in the middle of the night snuck into her room...no, wait, she fell asleep on the floor the night before after a drowsiness came over. Had she been drugged? Surely Happosai wouldn’t have gone that far? In any case, she appeared to indeed be wearing girls’ underwear. She started taking them off but then she saw something, the pubic hair was...purplish...

Ranma: He dyed this too?!
But the voice she heard, while having the same accent and attitude, was not her own, it belonged to neither her girl or guy form.

In addition, she was truly beginning to notice how sensitive her skin was feeling. And that something about the structure of her body was off. With that, she quickly rushed over to a mirror, and nearly screamed.

The fact that the room she was in looked Chinese should’ve tipped her off.

Meanwhile, Akane was waking up as well-but...it felt rather breezy, and she realized she was outside. The next thing that alerted her senses was that her chest felt...flat...well, not quite flat...and then, she noticed something else...

She suddenly snapped up. Taking in her surroundings only briefly she appeared to be at a camping site, in front of a campfire that had long died out, behind her was a tent. Well, behind...him?

She felt at her crotch, and noticed that she was wearing pants...that looked strangely familiar. She quickly took them off along with a pair of boxers to see...

Akane (with Ryouga’s voice): AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

At the Tendo Dojo, Shampoo, too, was noticing a certain organ she had not previously possessed-well, at least not in the sense that it was attached to her. However, when she felt her chest, she immediately realized whose chest it was...the one she’d often thrown herself on before either Akane came along or he finally managed to push her off.

Shampoo (with Ranma’s Voice): How Shampoo end up in Ranma body?

Nabiki awoke to a strange smell...incense? As her eyes eased open she found that she was not in her room...or on the floor where she’d passed out the night before. Then she noticed that there was significantly less of her. She knew this couldn’t be possible, she thought she must be dreaming, and tried to wake up, but she didn’t, and everything felt too real to be a dream, anyway. But if it wasn’t a dream, what was it?

It took her the longest to realize something very small between her legs. She knew she had to find a mirror, and when she did, much like Ranma and Akane, she screamed, but with a different person’s voice.

Ukyo was also realizing something similar as she found herself in a rather luxurious-looking room, and thanks to a mirror that covered the opposite wall, almost immediately discovered that she had somehow ended up in Kuno’s body. Her screams added to the screams that were already starting to ring seemingly throughout Nermia.

Kuno, respectively, found himself in Ukyo’s body, and promptly fainted.

Not all the screams were ones of horror as Happosai awoke in Kasumi’s body, he let out a quite joyful cry, and started dancing around. Soun happened to walk by the kitchen were Kasumi had awoken.

“You seem quite energetic today, Kasumi.” He commented.

Kasumi wasn’t nearly has happy to be inhabiting Happosai’s body, but she didn’t scream in joy or horror, she was simply quite befuddled by what happened. All she could do is wonder how this happened. Happosai had apparently been out the night before and fallen asleep in an alleyway, not far from a sidewalk. At that moment a woman happened to be passing by on that sidewalk, and somehow she found herself clinging to that woman, whose screams added to the resounding chorus.

‘Must be some kind of reflex’ she thought to herself.

When Ryouga woke up he knew exactly where he was, but had no idea why. He was lying on the floor of the Tendo dojo. He looked across to see Ranma standing above him...feeling his own chest?

Then he noticed something else, as he stood up he noticed two mounds poking out of his own chest.

Ranma?: Who switch bodies with Akane? Shampoo must not be only one.

Ryouga turned to face a mirror that was conveniently located in the hallway where he was standing. He nearly met the same fate as Kuno when he saw Akane’s body where his should be, and moving exactly the way he was moving.

Just then, a little voice in the back of his head begins to think of all the possibilities, all the things that he could do now that he was in control of Akane’s body...but then, Angel Ryouga appeared as well, arguing that he should not be violating the sanctity of Akane’s virginal body. The devil Ryouga pointed out that it couldn’t be stated for a fact that Akane is actually a virgin, and furthermore there’s one way he could check...

To be continued...

Duh duh duhn!!

Conclusion: No lemon scenes, this is just to set up what limited plot this story will have. lol
Expect Chapter 2 to have a little more “action” in it. :D

But wait...what about Dimi-Chan and Juton?!

Dimi-Chan: What is thy bidding, my master?

Shadowy Figure #1: You have done well, Dimi-Chan. They will be doing lots of nasty things soon...I have foreseen it...

Shadowy Figure #2: I have foreseen it is well. Within the next 24 hours they will be going at it like rabbits.

Juton: And what of the son of Skywalker?

Shadowy Figure #1: He’s not in this story, you idiot!!

Juton: Oh, right...sorry...

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