Ranma 1/2: Black and Blue

Chapter 1

By Evil Eric

"My love, my enemy, my friend,

You've left me black and blue again,

Romantic conflict just has left me paralyzed,

The way I feel about you, I had never realized."

-EASTside Four, "Black and Blue"

Ranma had hoped, just for once, he could make it to school without something going horribly, horribly wrong.  Something had.

"Well if she did, I bet you'd just *love* it!" Akane hollered.

"Hey!  Did you hear one word I said other than 'Shampoo' or what?" he shot back.  He wasn't in the mood to deal with this today.

His morning hadn't exactly been stellar.  He'd already been tossed into the koi pond twice, orbit-kicked once, Genma had eaten his breakfast, and Happosai had made another of his random visits just as a dripping Ranma-chan had pulled herself out of the koi pond in nothing but a tank top and boxers.  That hadn't been the highlight of the day, to say the least.

He and Akane had been dashing madly to school again when he had made an off-topic remark that wouldn't it be just *great* if Shampoo showed up and tried to kidnap or blackmail him into dating her again?  The tomboy, being unable to detect sarcasm of any kind, had launched into one of her rants about what a sick pervert he was.  So here they were.

"If you want to be with Shampoo so much, go to her!" Akane screeched.  "I sure won't miss you!"

"Dammit, I didn't do anything!  Quit yelling at me!"

Akane was about to ignore this last suggestion and continue yelling at him when his martial artist's awareness kicked in.  Seemingly out of nowhere, he grabbed the blue-haired girl off her feet and pressed her body to his.  Half a second later, there was a huge hole in the ground where Akane had been standing, and an amorous, mallet-wielding Kuno Kodachi standing over it.

Akane, of course, thought the best thing to do in this situation was to give Ranma a black eye.

"You hentai!  Let go of me!"

"Well excuse *me* for saving your *life*!" Ranma shot back, not putting up with her ingratitude.

Kodachi cleared her throat loudly, and the two of them turned their attention to the leotard-wearing gymnast.  Ranma let go of Akane, and the instant he did, Kodachi attached herself to his neck.

"Such an ungrateful peasant, isn't she, Ranma darling?" Kodachi cooed.  "Certainly there are more...appealing choices of company?"

Ranma tried to babble out a response as Akane began fuming all over again.  "What the hell are you doing?!" she asked both of them.

Kodachi got an evil look in her eyes and pulled herself from Ranma's almost-embrace.  She bowed politely to Akane.

"I am merely engaging in friendly and fair competition for our mutual object of affection, Tendo-san," she said.

While she had her head lowered, Kodachi swung the mallet again, trying to catch Akane off-guard.  Instead, Akane caught the mallet and sent it sideways into the ground again.

"I don't know what part of that to correct first, but it sounds like an attempt to add insult to injury," Akane said.

"Ohoho," Kodachi laughed.  "It seems I have outlived my welcome, so I shall take my leave of you, Ranma darling.  But fear not, I shall return soon!  The Black Rose shall not be denied!  Ohohohohoho!"

With that, she took to the rooftops in a spray of black rose pedals.  One completely intact rose, thorns and all, found its way to Akane's face.  Akane seethed with rage again, and started running after the gymnast.

"You get back here!  I'm not finished with you!"

Ranma stood there, dumbstruck, watching Akane trail Kodachi with her own mallet.  He shook his head, realizing how foolish he had been to think he could get to school without hell breaking loose.

"And they blame *me* for things not being normal around here," he said.

-----

Later that night, Akane was just returning to her room after a long, late-night training session.  Her muscles ached and her gi was soaked with sweat.  Naturally, she was looking forward to a long bath.

She set her workout towel down on her bed, and she noticed something else she had left there before her workout: the black rose Kodachi had thrown at her that morning.  She had hidden it in her uniform all day at school because she hadn't wanted Ranma or her friends to see it.  Even now, she opened her door a crack to make sure no one was coming her way.  A crash downstairs followed by what sounded like Nabiki making Ranma pay for something else told her she was safe.

Akane closed the door again.  She held the dark flower to her nose and slowly inhaled its scent.

"Ho ho ho," said a voice.  "Like it?"

Akane jerked her head around, trying to see who had spoken, but there was no one else in the room.  At least, not on the ground.  She looked up, and there was Kodachi, bracing herself on the ceiling with both feet and one hand, holding her mallet in the other.

"What are you doing up there?" Akane asked.

"Merely attempting to gain the advantage," Kodachi said.  She hopped down from the ceiling and spun the mallet around in her hand.

Akane crossed her arms and gave the black-haired girl a smug look.  "Uh-huh, right, like I'd ever let you get that."

"Ah, but I already have!  I am here, am I not?"

"Maybe, but the question is how long you get to stay here."

"Oho, how much time will this earn me?"

Kodachi set the mallet on the edge of Akane's desk.  She brought her hands to Akane's soft cheeks and gently drew the other girl closer, and closer, until their lips met.

Akane broke the kiss after a second.  "Good, but let me take care of something first."

She reached around to the back of Kodachi's head and undid the white ribbon that held her ponytail.  The gymnast's long, silky hair fell all around her shoulders, and Akane nodded her approval.

"There, much better," she said.

They kissed again, but this time it was more than a brief contact like the last time.  Akane's tongue slid between her lips and traced the outline of Kodachi's, pleading entrance to the gymnast's mouth.  Kodachi puckered her lips around Akane's tongue, then opened her mouth and let it duel with her own.

The two girls stayed like that a long time, each enjoying the taste of the other's mouth while their hands caressed each other's bodies.  Akane stroked the Black Rose's raven-colored hair, while Kodachi ran her palms along Akane's back.

After a while they separated, looking into each other's eyes.

"Wow..." Akane said.  "I'd say you've earned as much time as you want." She giggled.

"Ah, my love, you are too gracious," Kodachi said.

She moved around behind the shorter girl and put her hands on Akane's shoulders.  She rubbed them gently but firmly, relieving the tension in Akane's muscles.  Akane's breathing became ragged.

"Ahh, you always know-oh!-exactly what to do..." Akane said.

"Well, it is not as if the rigors of training have left me without a proper sense of the body," Kodachi explained.

"I'll say you have a proper sense of the body!"

"So glad you agree..."

Kodachi continued massaging Akane's back with her left hand while her right sneaked around to Akane's chest.  She ran a finger slowly up and down her breast, tracing the kanji in Akane's name through the fabric of the gi.  Akane moaned with pleasure, but Kodachi wasn't finished.  The gymnast fastened her lips around Akane's earlobe and blew softly into her ear.

Akane gasped and screwed her eyes shut.  She was thankful Kodachi was standing behind her as she continued her ministrations, or she probably would have fallen over right there.

"Koda-chan..."

"Yes, Akane love?"

"You know, someday we're-ooh!-going to have to tell people about us..."

"I know, love."

Kodachi rubbed her fingernail over Akane's nipple, grinding it softly through the gi.

"I'm afraid of how Ranma will take it," Akane said.  "I think he still loves me...part of him does, anyway."

"I know, Akane-chan, I am afraid of that too," Kodachi said.  "And I am worried how my dear brother will react.  Although he doesn't pose the same hazard Ranma does, he does have quite a capacity to make all our lives a living hell."

"Not to mention our families," Akane added.  She really didn't want to imagine her father's reaction if he ever found out what she and the Black Rose were doing.  Or, for that matter, what would happen if Principal Kuno did.  Then there was Ryoga, and Kuno, and Gosunkugi...and even her friends Yuka and Sayuri.

Kodachi could sense her lover's passion giving way to apprehension, and decided to do something about it.  She turned Akane around in her arms and held her.

Looking Akane in the eyes, she said, "Stop that.  This is a time for us.  There will be a time for them.  Right now I need you.  I love you.  Always remember that, Akane love.  I love you, no matter what any of them have to say about it."

"Gomen," Akane said.  "I know...I love you too, Koda-chan.  I always will."

"And do you want me?" Kodachi asked.

"Gods, yes!" Akane said.  "I want you right here, right now!"

Kodachi's trademark devilish look appeared on her face again, but this time there was an aura of lust surrounding it.  She noticed Akane was still holding the rose she had "taunted her" with earlier, and took it in her own hands.

"Patience, my love, patience...a proper expression of love must be absolutely perfect from start to finish, each second bringing pleasure greater than the one before it..."

Kodachi traced the rose's soft petals over Akane's face.  Akane closed her eyes and whined.

"Mouu...you aristocrats and your 'proper conduct!'  It's enough to drive a person mad!"

"Yes, but can you deny that our love-making is any less than a work of art, Akane-chan?"

"Nooo..."

"Then let us paint the walls with our love!"

With that, Kodachi pushed Akane gently backward onto the bed.  Tossing the sweaty towel aside, Kodachi pressed her body against her lover's, and Akane found herself the patron of Kodachi's art.

-----

"You want me to do WHAT?!" Ranma hollered.

"Come on, boy, don't be so stubborn!" Genma said.  "You haven't had a proper test of your skills in months, and I don't want you to get out of shape!"

"I ain't getting out of shape!  And I ain't going to Yokohama to fight some psycho clan, either! Hell, this is probably another one of your stunts to get some free grub."

"How dare you talk to your father that way!"

Genma launched himself at Ranma, who casually kicked him through the window and into the koi pond.  Genma-panda pulled himself out and held up a sign that read, "You'll be sorry!"

"Yeah, whatever," Ranma said.

Then he heard something upstairs.  A crash, followed by what sounded like a scream...coming from Akane's room.

"Akane?" he called.  No response.  "Aw, shit...what now?  Shampoo?  Or maybe Kodachi again?  I don't need this right now!"

Ranma began racing up the stairs to Akane's room.  He waited by the door and tried to hear what was going on inside.  It was hard to tell, but he thought he could hear some soft thumps and muffled cries.  Kami...was he too late?  If someone had hurt Akane, they would have Saotome justice to answer to, that was for sure.

"Akane!  Are you OK?  What's-"

As Ranma kicked the door open, he wasn't sure what he expected to see, but what greeted his eyes was possibly the last thing he though he would ever lay them upon.

-----

Akane was trying hard not to scream as Kodachi ravished her body.  As it was, she had to grit her teeth and crush her bed sheets in her fists to maintain herself.  Moans escaped her lips one after another.

"Is that good for you, Akane love?" Kodachi cooed.

"Yes!  Yes!"

Kodachi leaned forward to run her hand through Akane's hair, and they kissed again.  Akane could taste herself in Kodachi's mouth.

"Just relax," Kodachi said.  "We have only begun..."

The Black Rose renewed her assault on Akane's womanhood, and a scream was stuck halfway through her vocal cords.  She tried to force it back down, knowing Ranma, Genma, Soun, Nabiki and Kasumi were all inside the house, and it would probably bring them all running.  But as the spasms began to overtake her, Akane lost her control.  And for a moment, she lost her desire even to have control.

Her body jerked uncontrollably, shaking the whole bed.  The bed bumped into the desk, and the motion caused Kodachi's precariously-placed mallet to fall over the edge.  It hit the floor with a loud bang. At the same time, Akane was overcome with passion and screamed her pleasure out as loud as she could.

Kodachi sensed the implications of what happened quickly, and as Akane was totally depleted of her energy, she had to act fast.  The two of them did not hear the footsteps coming up the stairs and down the hall as Kodachi clamped her hand over Akane's mouth, trying to keep the girl from alerting anyone else with quiet moans.

Then there was a voice at the door, and they knew all was lost.

"Akane?!  Are you OK?  What's-"

The door flew open, and a battle-primed Ranma was standing there.  He took a look at the scene before him: his fiancee and her hated enemy, lying in bed together, sweaty, breathing fast, and...oh, completely naked.

He had to shake his head, hoping that somehow Cologne had drugged him again and he was hallucinating.  But when he looked again, they were still there, still naked, and still staring at him.

"Ranma, what's going on up there?" asked the nervous voice of Tendo Soun.  Ranma didn't answer; he was too busy trying to pull his jaw out of the floor.  "Ranma, what-"

The older man appeared in the doorway as well, and his reaction was just like Ranma's.  Akane and Kodachi, realizing the situation they were in, covered themselves with the sweaty sheets.  Ranma and Soun were joined by a soaking-wet Genma-panda, who did the panda equivalent of a face fault.  Nabiki and Kasumi were attracted by all the attention.  Nabiki, who was eating chips, almost choked on one, while Kasumi merely gasped and covered her mouth with her hand.

The girls were the only ones who were able to speak, and Akane and Kodachi weren't sure which Tendo sister best expressed the collective reaction to what they saw.

"Oh my..."

"Well, at least Happosai left before he could see this..."

To be continued.

-----

Author's notes:

What's wrong with Akane/Kodachi?  I LIKE them.

"Black and Blue" copyright 2002.

Lyrics reprinted with permission.

Written by "Evil Eric" Sharp and EASTside Four.