{These characters are not property of me, except for that of Ryuuji. I would never try to claim them as my own. This story may not be used without my permission, and may not be used to make money in any way, shape or form. Characters and certain situations were created by Rumiko Takahashi, so don't try any funny stuff!}
by Lara Bartram
First his father. Now his mother. Ryuuji decided at that point that he hated life. Nothing good ever came of it, only bad things. He looked forlornly at the two gravestones. His lot in life to be miserable... He remembered thinking that so long ago. And here it was, all coming true.
He dropped to his knees in the wet grass and put a hand on each marker. Their lives... all for naught. His eyes felt a bit moist, but he shed no tears. He had done all that a long time ago, when he had thought he was the only person in the world with problems.
He had come to see how his weren't problems at all, he was actually lucky. And now, the sources of all his happiness and joy in life were both gone. He set a white orchid in front of each headstone, trying to keep control of his feelings.
He was angry and sad and depressed and he felt so alone. Alone without the man he had idolized: his father. Alone without the woman he loved: his mother. He bowed his head and closed his eyes. "Why did you leave me? What do I do now?" he asked softly.
He had nowhere to go, no one to turn to. He was alone in the world. He could always ask to stay with one of his aunts; they had always liked him. Sell the house and try to move on... He felt the lump in his throat and tightness in his chest. Move on? How was he supposed to move on without his life?
He began to form a plan...
***
He slipped into the hot water. It was hot, so hot he thought he might be scalded. But the hotter, the better. He lifted the picture carefully, avoiding getting any water on it. It had been taken over 9 years ago, at his 11th birthday party.
He was standing between his mother and father, smiling, laughing. He was so small compared to the two of them... Ryuuji couldn't stop himself and the tears came. Not for the past, but for the future. What might have been if his father hadn't died, if his mother hadn't died...
He set the picture to the side where he could still see it. His mouth slowly turned down, expressing the ache of loneliness he felt inside. He thought momentarily about the rest of his relatives, that they would be sad at his passing. But they would get over it, he would become nothing but a pleasant memory to them eventually.
He had sold the house and a great deal of their possessions. Anything left he had written down was to be divided among the rest of the family, in any way they wished. He lifted the knife, still staring at the picture. This was what his life had become, a pointless exercise in suffering. It was time to end it, once and for all.
He slowly dragged the knife across one wrist, not looking at the scarlet line that appeared. He only thought of his family, his precious family, that he had lost so long ago...