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	I stare at my door, wondering what I am going to do about oyaji; he
wouldn't like Oneesama.  I go to open the door when I hear something strange
from Akane's room.

	I fing the door open, then stop.  ``Oneesama?'' I whisper, staring at
the mess, Oneesama with this huge mallet; Akane with a really angry look on her
face.

	``Do I know you?'' she has that look people often wear just before they
realize.

	``It's me, Ranma, from this morning.''  She blinks at me, then shifts
her grip on the mallet and squeezes past me, closing the door behind her.  I
catch a single glimpse of Akane's shocked face before the door closes.

	``How?'' I just look at Akane's door, and she knods, ``Follow,'' and
leads the way out of the house.  We settle onto the roof, she takes me in her
arms, and I start talking.

	``A couple months ago Oyaji took us to a final stop in China, the
training ground known as Jusenkyou. . .'' I retell the full story, not
bothering with the four-part harmony.  I squirm a little bit as I finish, and
she loosens her grip.

	``That's pretty bad.  Would you like me to hurt him for you?''

	``Nah, I don't think that is necessary,'' I look at my hands for a
moment, then ask, ``Why do you act like that?''

	``Like what?''

	``Like you were in Akane's room, or with those girls this morning.''

	``Because it is fun, and no one can make me stop.''

	``Could you stop if you wanted to?''

	``Yes.  Come along,'' she lets go of me and leads the way off into the
night.  She heads straight to her house, and we slip through her window.

	``Onto the bed.'' she waves me over, and I comply, sitting on the
edge.  She presses me back onto the bed, sitting on my belly, my hands pinned
between her knees and my sides.  She smiles at me sweetly, then kisses me on
the lips, snuggling against me.  After a moment she sits back again, starting
to undo the ties on my shirt.  I fight back the only way I can, leaning forward
to kiss her fingers, her lips, attempting to distract her.  Eventually she
overpowers me, somehow getting my shirt off without freeing my hands or tearing
it.  My pants take a longer struggle, but she eventually gets them off, along
with my boxers.

	``Now I get to have my wicked way with you.''  She smiles, kisses me
lightly, her fingers stroking my face.  I fight to keep my attention on how
nice her body feels against me, rather than . . .

	``Oneesama,'' I concentrate on her kiss as she wiggles out of her
leotard, fighting back the worries; the fear.  She starts stroking my breasts;
it's nice, but not as nice as it was as a girl.  perhaps because I'm scared out
of my wits?  perhaps.

	She grabs it in one hand, holding it lightly; I barely stop myself from
cringing, force an encouraging gasp.  She nibbles at my face and I suddenly
remember the mornings reading.

	``Condom.''  The word comes out a bit funny.

	``What?''  She leans back a little bit, looks into my eyes.

	``Birth control.  I don't think either of us could cope with being a
parent.''

	``Che.  You're right.  Don't move.'' suddenly she's gone; almost before
I could have moved she's back.  Putting the condom on it doesn't take long, I'm
just glad I didn't have to do it, or watch.  She notices that it has softened,
anxiety tends to do that to it, and shifts her attention back to me.

	I loose myself in the blissful enjoyment of her kiss, almost manage not
to notice when she takes it once more in hand.  I don't interupt her this time,
and the feel of her sliding it into herself is actually pleasant; I'm at once
surprised and reasured.  Oneesama starts rocking back and forth slightly, it
sliding in and out.  I match her rhythm, thrusting with my hips, the fear
constant in the background.  Her breath quickens and I increase my tempo to
match hers, spellbound by the sight of her.

	Suddenly she places her hands on my shoulders, shifts her knees,
freeing my hands.  I let them slide onto her legs, stroke her knees.  When she
doesn't stop me I slide them higher, glorying in the feel of her soft
lightly-padded skin.  I stroke her belly softly, feel her shudder as my hands
slip over her solar plexus, and then she orgasms, a fierce look on her face.

	She keeps moving, so I don't stop, stroking her back, kissing her about
the neck and shoulders, nibbling lightly on her ear.  After another few moments
she orgasms again, collapses against me, slowing her hips to a stop.

	``You didn't come, did you?''  She says it gently enough that the words
don't sound accusing.

	``Nope.''  I kiss her neck, hoping to distract her so I won't have to
talk about it.  She moves and it slides out of her, still hard.  I suddenly
wish for a nice glass of water to fall on me, but none oblige.

	She starts stroking it with her hand; it's mildly pleasant, but the
fear overpowers that.  She notices the look on my face and stops.

	``What's wrong?''  I just shake my head.  She stares at me for a
moment, then puts three bits together to get four, ``Back in an instant,'' she
bounds off, and I hide under the covers, bury my face in the pillows.

	True to her word, Oneesama returns almost instantly, gently pulling my
head over the edge of her bed and pouring a glass of water over it.  The fear
lessens greatly, suddenly; I gasp at the feel of it backing off.  She sets
herself on the edge of the bed, pulling me into her lap, her hands stroking my
hair as she cuddles me to her breast.  ``Please, tell me.  If I don't know
what's wrong, I can't help.''

	``Guys aren't supposed to be afraid.''  She pulls me into a tighter
embrace for an instant, strokes my back gently.

	``Why are you afraid?''  I look up at her, there's a gentleness there
that I've not seen . . . ; suddenly I'm crying, and can't stop no matter how
hard I try.  Oneesama holds me through it all, rocking me softly back and
forth, her face pressed against my hair, murmuring soothing words that I only
hear the gentle tone of.  The tears slow, a safe warmth filling the place they
left behind.

	``I,'' I have to gulp air to continue, ``don't know.  As long as I can
remember being undressed has made me nervous; the longer I stay that way the
worse it gets.  I can function in just an undershirt and boxers, but it's hard
for me.  The more clothing I wear, the less I worry, like a fool, that someone
is going to steal my clothing off my body and do vague unpleasant things to
me.''  I wipe at my eyes, look up at her,  ``Silly, huh?''

	She smiles at me, kisses my forehead, ``Probably not.  Why doesn't it
bother you as a girl?''

	I snort; it is a good question and the only thing I can figure out is,
``Probably because it isn't there anymore.  I've been wishing it wasn't there,
not to be a girl, but just to be rid of it, for a long time.  Taking off my
shirt around others scares me almost witless as a guy, but not as a girl, so I
rather think that's it.''

	``Who did that to you?''

	``How would I know?  Probably it was Kusooyaji; he's done the most to
mess up my life.''  The feel of her in my arms and the cared-for feeling
generated by her concern are horribly arousing, I suddenly realize.  I shift
myself in her arms, press her back against the bed, kiss her as passionately as
I can manage.

	She takes the hint, rolling us over onto my back, pressing her knee
between my thighs.  I gasp, the feel of her touch is just glorious.  She rolls
us back and forth for a moment, trying to kiss the back of my shoulders, biting
lightly at my collarbone.  The feel of my breasts against her, her strong arms
around me, all too soon I can't keep myself still, my hips rock slowly as I
kiss her back, nibble at her sweaty throat, taste the salt soaking her hair.  I
want her, want her to keep me, love me, protect me from the nameless terrors I
fight daily.  Her thrusts match to mine, her hips pressed to mine, both of us
moaning appreciatively, my breath rather short.

	``Oneesama,'' such a simple word to convey what I need to say.

	``mmnn,'' murmured around my throat, nicer than any endearment I've
ever recieved.  Perhaps I've never recieved any; that would suit the mess I've
lived.  She presses slightly harder against me, the tension in my body jolting
higher; I think for an instant it will crest.  I moan loudly, grab her ear
between my teeth to shut myself up, pinch lightly, and she moans a responce,
``Ranma-chan,'' speeding her thrusts.

	``Oneesama,'' it takes most of my willpower to keep my fingernails,
short as they are, out of her back.

	``Ranma,'' she gasps the word, clutching me to her as she shudders,
bringing me over in a rush.  I lay beneath her, the world pulsing slightly with
my heartbeat, totally spent.

	After a few moments she tries to roll herself off me.  ``Don't,
please.''  I apply a little force to make sure she understands what I'm talking
about.  She stops, rests her head against my shoulder, kisses the top of my
breast.

	``Why not?''

	``I like the way this feels.  It feels safe.'' such a word to use, I'd
intended something better like loved, but safe is as true.

	``Do you know about phobias?''  hardly seems the appropriate time.

	``Yeah.  Irrational fears.  In my case it's perfectly rational fears at
an irrational level.  No one wants to walk about town naked; I can't walk
around the house with my shirt off.  Nobody wants to be scratched by a cat; it
takes all of my willpower to stay in the same room as one.  I've managed to
fight them back to the point that I can function despite them, but it is so
hard to do with kusooyaji about,'' I decide to trust her, ``That's why I try to
run around with so little on when I'm a girl, I don't want to further
generalize my phobia about being unclothed.  It's already far too broad.''

	``Un.  Wakatteru yo,'' she kisses me one more time, whispers
``Oyasumi,'' pulls the covers over us, and falls asleep.  I enjoy the pleasant
squashed feel for a little while before following her.

[kua.  Looked in the manga today; this whole thing happens early/mid fall
. . .  --S]

	I wake up cuddled against her, she's fallen off to one side a little
bit, her face so peaceful.  I consider moving, wonder again where the clock is
hidden.  It is probably about six, but last night was long enough I can't be
sure.  I could move, possibly waking her; I could stay curled against her, and
possibly be late for school.  I stretch forward, kiss her ever so gently on the
lips, the warmth of her filling me, protecting me.

	I shake my head slightly, all I've read says I'm in for a rough time,
but I feel safer than I can remember having ever felt.  Perhaps I am, perhaps
the mess of my life will intrude and I'll be left worse off than before; but I
don't think it will.

	I kiss her again, whisper, ``Oneesama, okitte.''  She stirs slightly,
starts awake, all of her muscles stiffening.

	She looks at me without recognition for an instant, then relaxes, takes
me in her arms, ``Ohayo, Ranma-chan.''  Her smile sends a warm frission down
the center of my chest, and I press myself against her happily.

	``Che.''

	``Nani?''

	``Gakkou ni ikinakya.''

	``How 'bout I walk you to school?  I can cope with being ten minutes
late.''

	``Won't that get you in trouble?''  She shakes her head and kisses me.

	``No, their too scared I'll do something to them.''

	``Would you?''  The worry pops out in my voice before I think to
contain it.

	``Probably not.  Why, are you worried I'll hurt them?''

	``No, but if you hurt them they'll try to take you away.''  I manage to
swallow the `from me,' then wonder if I should have let it out.

	``Don't worry; I won't give them reason.'' her voice is suddenly very
serious, then turns light, ``Scrub my back?''

	Kuu, ``Hai, Oneesama.''  She kisses me on the cheek, then rolls out of
bed, rummages in a large western-style closet, and throws me a long robe and a
housecoat.  I look at them a bit funny as she puts on her own robe.

	``My brother is a little hentai, and would doubtless assume that you
were here to chase him if he saw you running around as you are now.''  Ani?
Hentai?

	``"Kunou Tatewaki, Fuurinkan koukou no aoi ikazuchi" to iu kata
darou?''

	``Pin-pon.''  She giggles at the speed with which I get the clothing
on.  I walk up to her, she slips an arm about my shoulders and leads me to the
bathroom.

	``Anou,'' I mumble, ``Toire- wa dokou?''  She giggles at my question
and shows me to the proper doorway; I'm glad she doesn't decide to invite
herself in with me, as I've no idea how I would or should respond.  Moments
later, bladder empty, I open the door and she slips in after me, almost not
waiting for me to vacate the slippers.  I wait for a moment, then decide I
might as well wait at the bathroom.

	I stop outside the door, unwilling to risk facing that . . . person.
Oneesama shows up quickly and leads me into the largest private bathroom I've
ever seen.  She locks the door behind us, which calms my nerves a good deal.

	She scrubs me down very thoroughly, quickly.  My turn, and I'm oh so
tempted to linger, to prolong this, but Oneesama, at least, needs to get to
school.  The scrubbing finished, I contemplate the bath, the locked door
keeping what happened the last time I didn't have to force myself into the bath
from looping endlessly in my mind.  I still don't want to get in, even with
Oneesama there to keep me safe.

	Oneesama notices my hesitancy, and dries me off with a towel.  It feels
wonderful; I think Oneesama likes it too, as she smiles and kisses me when she
finishes, cutting off the last faint moan.

	I dress slowly, enjoying the supposedly simple pleasure of her gaze on
my body.  As I finish the final tie on my shirt she kisses me, sucking lightly
at my throat.  I press myself into the kiss, breath quickening, heart racing,
my arms wrapped around her.  She holds herself still, only her lips moving, and
I suddenly notice the now almost familiar tension building, making me shake
from nothing more than her lips on my neck.  After what seems an eternity she
breaks the suction, bites me lightly, and I orgasm in her arms, sag against
her.

	``Sorry 'bout that,''  I look up, Oneesama looks a bit embarrassed.

	``What?''

	``I didn't realize you are quite so,'' she seems to search for the
proper word for a moment, ``Excitable.''  This suddenly seems the funniest
thing I've ever heard and makes me giggle madly.

	``Don't be,'' I finally manage, ``I quite enjoyed it.''  I smile
brightly at her mildly bewildered expression.  ``You should get dressed or we
may never get to school.''  She nods reluctantly.

-

	She leads me out the front door, and I notice myself clinging a bit at
the thought of the mess running into Tatewaki would cause.  I force myself not
to let go of her and leap away, and try to figure out why that is my first
response to such a situation.  Manliness, I guess.  Men don't show fear, don't
show love, don't show respect, don't show friendship, don't show affection.
Guess I'm too manly for my own good.  By clinging I'm being vulnerable,
needing, not being self-contained as a man should be.  Letting myself cling
like this is scarier than running from Shanpoo in China, or almost as bad as
walking around as a guy with just a towel around my neck.  I snuggle up against
her to take the edge off my fear.

	``Love you.''
	
	She turns to stare at me, pausing us in the doorway, ``What?''
	
	I shake my head at her and pull her out the door.
	
	After about three blocks I realize how silly it must look to be
plastered to Oneesama's side and half waddling down the street, so I rather
sheepishly slip away from her a little bit, grabbing her hand.  Oneesama smiles
at me, then pulls me along by our joined hands when I stop.

	We get a few strange looks, but not many; most people seem to think we
are `just friends,' and most of the ones who don't smile happily at us.  A good
scowl backs all but one of the nasty looks off, and I don't even get all of my
knuckles cracked before the tough one ran away.

	School is a slightly different matter.  There are no supportive looks,
and somehow everyone seems to know instantly that we are not `just friends.'
At least they have enough sense not to attack.  Suddenly Kunou-sempai shows his
ugly mug, and I seriously contemplate hurting him for a moment or three.  It
would do no good, and might upset Oneesama, so I reach up over my shoulder to
grab hers, pressing myself to her front.

	He doesn't seem interested in me, which is good.  I suddenly spot his
target, a rather worried-looking Akane, and squeeze Oneesama's shoulder a bit
tighter.

	``Akane-kun,''  Kunou-sempai screams, ``Suki da!''  He makes this
aimless slash with his bokutou at the same time, and I just can't let it go

	``Um, Aoi-sempai,'' he picks up who I'm talking to almost instantly,
``Why are you wavin' that thing around like that?''

	``Why pig-tailed--'' he turns enough to see me then, and notices the
way I'm clinging to Oneesama.

	``. . .'' he says articulately, his mouth hanging open.  I must say
this is more fun than a 500 yen all-you-can-eat buffet.

	``Ranma!''  I turn to look at the source of this angry cry, knowing I
don't want to see it, ``The engagement is off!!''  Everyone in the school yard
gasps, half of them remembering about my curse, and the other half shocked that
Akane's iinazuke, the one who beat up Kunou-sempai, is actually a girl.

	``Akane . . . '' I get out as she storms away, and Oneesama wraps her
arms about me tightly.

	``I'm sorry, Ranma-chan.''  She suddenly makes like she's going to pull
away, and I react before I can think, spinning around and grabbing her rather
lightly, just hard enough to keep her from escaping easily.

	``Onegai,'' I whisper the single word, then start crying.  I fight the
overwhelming urge to make myself stop, drop to my knees and sob into her
uniform shirt.  Her hands stroke my hair, and I can hear murmors from the
crowd.  After a few moments, as I begin to calm down again, there is a thump
from behind me.  I look, tears still dripping down my face, and see that it was
Kunou-sempai, who is now laying on his back, his eyes wide open and a shocked
expression still on his face.

	It is suddenly far too funny, so I start laughing.  Oneesama joins me
after a moment, her demented cackle sounding far more normal than usual, or
maybe I'm just acclimating.  The other students soon follow.

	``Oneesama, you should get to school or you will be late, OK?''  She
nods and kisses me before she takes off, scattering black rose-petals as
usual.  I hug myself lightly and walk to class.

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