Akane woke and stretched, happily groaning as she pulled all the kinks out of her muscles. *Hmm... worn out this morning. Hips are kinda sore. Must have worked out extra hard yesterday,* she thought as she relaxed and scratched at her side. Actually, her hips were *really* sore, Akane thought to her self. "Oh yeah. I had my ankles back behind my head last night," she remembered. Groggily, her hair sticking up in wild array, Akane swung her legs over the side of her bed and began to make her way to the door, pausing briefly to step over the snoring lump on her floor. "Nnn..." Akane greeted Nabiki as the two met in the hall. She wondered why her sister was giving her those odd looks, but ignored them in favor of making her way directly down the stairs and to the furo. Did Nabiki have a black eye? She stopped in the changing room briefly, and giggled at her hair in the mirror before taking off the red Chinese shirt she was... Uhoh. Sore hips. Snoring lump in bedroom floor. Red Chinese shirt. Akane's happy expression cracked slightly. Slowly, ponderously, one petite hand reached down under the hem of the shirt. "No panties..." Akane breathed, a sick grin still stuck on her face. She probed with her fingers... ...And came up sticky. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" ------------------------------ PINK LEMONADE Akane the Queen ~or~ Nine Inches of Passion Spice A Lemon/Lime Spritzer by by Chris Jones ------------------------------ "I see you had a good time last night," Nabiki mumbled as she made her way into the changing room. "Nonononononononononnononononononononono..." Nabiki grimaced at her reflection in the mirror. She grimaced at the black eye that was still mostly swelled shut and made an ineffectual attempt to get her hair to lay down. Akane simply ran out of the room, screaming. * * * Watching the screaming girl run through the tea-room to the stairs clad in only one of Ranma's red shirts, Genma grinned evilly and clinked the rim of his tea-cup against Soun's. Soun nodded his head and downed the breakfast tea in one hearty gulp. Kasumi glared darkly at the both of them while Nodoka was making up a list of appropriate baby-names. * * * Ranma awoke groggily at the girl's screams and tried to blink the sleep out of his eyes. He sat up just in time to see the door swing open and Akane's heaving figure staring at him with a wild expression. "Mornin'," he mumbled, trying to figure out why he was so exhausted. "NOOOOOOOOO!" Akane screamed, running away from the door. The door slammed against the frame but bounced back. "What'd I do this time?" Ranma blinked again. "Hey, what am I doin' in her room?" * * * Nabiki finished brushing her teeth and rinsed. When she came back up from the sink, Akane was in her face, breathing heavily. "How?!?!" the younger girl demanded. "When?!?!" The, more seriously, with a glint of fury in her eyes, "Who? And how did you get a black eye?" "Ah... Awake at last, I see," Nabiki noted. "I'll tell you, but first you have to tell me what it was like." Akane felt a goofy grin forming on her face. "Oh, about nine inches long and as hard as---" Akane covered her mouth in horror as her face turned a bright pink color. "Heh," Nabiki chuckled, and clutched at her sides. She winced at the movement, letting Akane know that the black eye was probably just the most superficial of her injuries. "As for my present condition, it was Ukyou. Between us, we royally... ahem... *screwed* her plans last night, and she felt the need to take her anger out on somebody, and you were... heh, *unavailable*. Oh, I'll be billing *her* tomorrow, I tell you!" Akane shook her head, trying to clear her mind. The details of the previous evening were blurry in some respects, but some things, now that she remembered she had done them, were frightfully clear. All nine inches of them. "You better start at the beginning, Nabiki," Akane said, collapsing to the floor in disbelief. "Well, it was Shampoo's grandmother's passion spice again..." * * * "It getting too too dangerous!" Shampoo said, staring at the okonomiyaki chef over her grill. "Violent girl no break up with husband even after wedding go boom!" "I'll say," Ukyou agreed as she was irritably scrubbing her grill. "That was a sure thing!" "Maybe Ranma-sama and Akane-sama have stronger feelings that we expected," Konatsu suggested hopefully. "Ranma's too shy," Ukyou ignored her wait-person completely. "He just needs a little prompting. Just a little push. Hmmm..." "What spatula-girl thinking?" the purple-haired delivery girl asked. "Maybe if we got him drunk..." Ukyou mused aloud. "Alcohol loosens the tongue. If we got him just rip-roaring-fall-down toasted, he might finally be able to admit that he really loves me." "Airen love Shampoo!" the amazon countered. "Ranma get drunk on sake, say he love Shampoo!" "Urr... sometimes people say things they don't mean when they're intoxicated," Konatsu suggested, busy trying to keep Ukyou from scrubbing away the entire top layer of steel off the grill. Ukyou deflated. "That's true. My father said that he was the emperors's brother once. He only had a few bottles in him at the time." Shampoo scowled and leaned over the counter, her head resting on her arms. "Maybe..." "What?" "Well. No good. Try before and no work." "Out with it, China-girl," Ukyou growled. "Passion spice. Make people very... excited. Never seem to work right. Always give to wrong person or..." Ukyou caught fire, the heat of her pure heart lighting up the room. "But we *will* give it to the right person, Shampoo!" Ukyou declared. "Between the two of us, we can arrange things so that Ranma gets a hearty dose of the spice. If we're both there, then he'll have no choice but to admit who he really loves!" *Me!!!!* she declared to herself. Then Ukyou caught fire, the gas heating element exposed as she finally scrubbed all the way through the grill. The sleeve of her shirt charred and ignited. Ukyou waved it around in a panic while Konatsu tried to extinguish the flame with his own body. *Me!!!* Shampoo thought, smirking at the flaming chef. "Okay! We do it. We make new food and put Passion Spice in!" "Owowowowowwo!" Ukyou bellowed, beating her arm against Konatsu to put out the fire. "I get Airen for sure! Hahahaha!" * * * "Delivery!" "Oh, who's there?" Kasumi asked. "It Shampoo! Have new kind of ramen for Airen to try!" "It's Ukyou! I have a new kind of okonomiyaki for Ran-chan to sink his teeth into." "Oh, my!" Kasumi let both girls in the kitchen door. "Okonomiyaki *and* Ramen! Just what I was already making for dinner." "You don't say," Ukyou muttered. "We'll have plenty to go around, then!" Kasumi declared. Why don't you just put it over there and--" "Okay. Shampoo put special hmpphh!!!!" "Heh," Ukyou chuckled, clutching her hand over Shampoo's mouth. "We'll just leave them over here. They're only for Ran-chan, though, okay?" Kasumi's expression dimmed somewhat. To those that knew her, this was a full fledged Kasumi-glare, and it couldn't be dodged lightly. Ukyou began to giggle nervously under the onslaught. "Ahahaha!" "You two didn't do anything naughty to the food did you?" Kasumi asked sweetly in a tone that would not be ignored. Shampoo's eyes widened in horror. "Err... No!" "They won't explode like last time will they?" "Absolutely not!" Ukyou defended. "Well, you could explode them, if you happened to have a handy stick of cordite laying around but--- Nevermind! These Oknomiyaki--" "Ramen" Shampoo volunteered. "--Okonomiyaki are designed to be eaten! Not to do demolition with!" "Ramen." "So which is it? okonomiyaki or ramen?" Kasumi asked. "Okonomiyaki!" "Ramen!" "Rokonomiyaiken!" Ukyou declared, opening the lids on their boxes, displaying their new confection. Indeed what was inside was a thick, noodle soup with mini-okonomiyaki dumplings floating prettily just on top of the soup. "Ara! How delightful!" Kasumi exclaimed. "May I taste?" "Noooo! Kasumi no taste this!!!!" Shampoo screamed. "Here ah... ah..." Ukyou grabbed one of the other boxes and handed it to Shampoo. "This one's good!" The amazon breathed a sigh of relief and handed it to the eldest Tendou daughter. "This one for nice-nice girl," Shampoo said, her chest heaving. Kasumi produced a pair of chopsticks and lifted a mini- okonomiyaki dumpling from the broth and blew on it ever so gently. She popped in her mouth and smiled broadly. "Why, how exquisite! I'm certain that Ranma will love this!" "He should," Ukyou said, glaring at the floor. "What?" "Heh! Nothing...!" Shampoo dragged Ukyou away from the situation by ear. "How you do that?" Shampoo demanded. Ukyou breathed a sigh of relief and held a jar. "I thought something like this might happen, so I didn't put any of the passion spice in yet. Your grandmother also gave me an antidote to the spice, just in case." "So Kasumi get one bowl?" Ukyou nodded. "That means there are only two left." "Very very bad! We have to conserve food. Very bad if Airen no eat!" "I know," Ukyou admitted. "Still, better safe than sorry, ne?" "Better not work with moron and get burn!" Shampoo growled. "We work now. Spatula-girl no mess up again!" "Who messed up?" "Dinner's ready!" Kasumi shouted. * * * "Look, is Godzilla." Shampoo pointed out the window as the Tendous at down to eat. "Mercenary-girl have camera?" "Where?" Nabiki demanded, her hands reaching into the pocket on her overalls for her micro-35mm. There was the standing 100,000 yen reward from the Tokyo Enquirer for a real photo of the Monster Who Ate Tokyo to think of. Ukyou took the opportunity Shampoo's distraction offered to lean over and season Ranma's bowl of rokonomiyakiken. "Mmm! This looks really good!" Ranma said after the group had failed to watch the Green Menace materialize on the Tokyo skyline. Akane 'hmphed' and turned her nose up at Ranma and the other girls. "Just a second, boy!" Genma said, reaching out with his chopsticks. He snagged one of the dumplings from Ranma's bowl and proceeded to pop it into his own mouth. "You can't try a new kind of food without offering some to your old man!" Ukyou's eyes widened in horror. She dropped her chopsticks and covered her mouth in abject fear. Shampoo leaned over and began sneezing. She held her fist up to her face. The net effect was that the girl 'sneezed' a fine coating of golden powder, the Passion Spice antidote, directly into Genma's face. "That kind of behavior spreads germs, you know," Soun noted as he munched another one of Ranma's dumplings. "Achoo! Achoo! Excuse Shampoo," Shampoo sneezed into Soun's face. "Hope Shampoo isn't contagious." "Some people have *no* manners," Nabiki noted, eating the bowl of rokonomiyakiken. "Aiya!" Ukyou's jaw dropped again. "Where'd you--" "I owed her," Ranma admitted. "Actually, I still owe here. That's for the hot kettle before yearbook pictures last month." "This is pretty good. Oh, my," Nabiki undid the top two buttons on her blouse. "Is it warm in here, or is it just me?" "Here!" Ukyou held out a glass of antidote-spiked soda. "This should cool you off! I hope! Compliments of Ucchan's!" "Why thank you, Ukyou!" To the chef's relief, Nabiki downed almost the entire glass of soda before resuming eating. To the chef's relief, Nabiki also refastened one button after realizing how much cleavage she had just exposed. "Shampoo be right back!" The amazon rushed into the kitchen and grabbed another bowl of the new concoction. She paused to sprinkle Passion Spice liberally over the dumplings. She hopped out of the kitchen and placed the bowl squarely in front of Ranma. "This one *just* for Airen. No repay debts or give away, okay?!" she said in a threatening tone. "O-okay," Ranma began to dig into the bowl. Shampoo turned back to smirk at Ukyou, just in time to see a silent, "NOOOO!!!" die on the chef's lips. "What?" "Akane ate the rest of Nabiki's ramen, and I'm out of antidote!" Ukyou shouted. "Antidote?" Soun asked in a panic. "I only ate one dumpling," Akane squeaked. "I was just curious." "WAAH! My little girl's been poisoned!" Soun wailed. "No!" Shampoo disagreed. "It infinitely worse than that! "Akane get Passion Spice. Ranma too! Shampoo no have antidote either!" "Hmmm?" Ranma asked, finishing off his bowl of rokonomiyakiken. "Hrmmm... Spice? Mmmm... " He blinked and smiled widely. His ears had turned red and his eyes seemed to have turned a nice shade of orange. Shampoo happened to cross his field of vision as he looked around. "Heya, Shampoo!" Akane's left eye twitched, but then it began to turn orange as well. "This chance!" Shampoo exclaimed, grabbing Ranma's face with both hand. "You tell Shampoo you love, yes?" "No, you hussy! He loves me!" Ukyou leaped over the table and punted Shampoo out the open shoji. She grabbed Ranma's hands and clasped them close to her chest. "Right Ranchan? You love me?" "Hurrr..." Ranma began breathing heavily and his pupils visibly dilated. "Oooh. Ucchan..." "Yes, Ranchan?" "Ucchan..." "Ranchan?" "Hey, look at Akane's tits, Ucchan! Don't you think they've gotten bigger in the last few months?" "Ranma, you jerk!" Ukyou slapped him back and forth, leaving his head spinning. "What about *my* tits?" "Ukyou," Akane warned, visibly shaking. "I think you better leave. We all need to calm down and... and... kiss Ranma's... I mean get over what ever you and Shampoo put in... Oh, my!" "Now if you really want to talk about great breasts," Ranma noted, "my girl side is pretty hot. She's not around right now, but that's okay." "Ranma!" "Airen quit talking about other girl's breasts!" Shampoo screamed as she ran back up to the table, bouncing like only an Amazon could. "Talk about Shampoo breast instead." "Ya knoww..." Ranma's speech was starting to become slurred. "Ish w-w-w-eird, but... but..." Ranma shook his head. "The besh breshs are... are... pert..." "Shampoo pert!" "Ucchan pert too, Ranchan!" The chef countered as she got back to her feet. "You want Ucchan!" "... and firm... I want?" "Yes?!?!" Both girls demanded "He wants me, you hussies, so take off!" Akane launched herself at Ranma, locking her wrists and ankles around his neck. "Don't you, Ranma-baka? Tee hee!" "A-a-a-ak-ak--" "That's right, they're there for you to squeeze. Nice and firm, huh? Not like flabby Shampoo's." Akane giggled cutely. "Oh my!" Kasumi's hands went to her mouth in shock. "Akane! You shouldn't!" "You go, sis!" Nabiki cheered. "Even if it is the spice..." Soun and Genma were in tears. "Oh, happy day, Tendou. Our families will be united at last!" "My little girl is growing up so quickly," Soun wailed. "Make your father proud, Akane!" "Sure thing, Daddy!" Akane reached down. "Ooh! Looks like Ranma-baka's up to the task!" "Aaaakannneee---" Ranma groaned. That was the last legible word he managed to utter. "Mmm... Squeeze harder, Ranma! I *like* it when you're rough!" "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Shampoo screamed. She pulled out a sword and lifted Akane's chin with it. "Shampoo kill pervert-girl now." Akane began to sweat in nervousness (and arousal). "Get in line, Sugar!" Ukyou shouted. "Sorry, Akane. You've had this comin' for a while. Get her!" "Yipe!" Akane leapt from Ranma's arms and ran through the house. Shampoo and Ukyou trampled across Ranma to get to her. Ranma, not noticing the crushing steps, hopped to his feet and looked forlornly after Akane. "Aaaa...." Nabiki looked down and noted the tent that had sprung up in Ranma's loose canvas pants. "Wow! You better get going, Ranma. Ukyou and Shampoo might get more for they bargain for if they attack Akane right now." Ranma grunted and nodded. Adjusting himself, he loped off after the three girls. He found the trio upstairs at the end of the hallway. Ukyou and Shampoo had Akane cornered with their bladed weapons. "Huuuu..." Ranma warned, batting the two girls away with barely a thought. "Kaaa..." "Oh, Ranma!" Akane moaned, collapsing into the martial artist's unthinking embrace. "Ranma, you come away from girl right now!" Shampoo cried, striking Ranma over the head with a bonbori. Ranma shrugged off the blow and turned around to stare stupidly at the amazon. "Hurrrr?" "Run, Akane!" Nabiki suggested from the other end of the hallway. Ranma can take care of himself." Akane nodded and leapt over the other two girls. She ran down the hall and blew a kiss to her fiancee as she grabbed Nabiki. "Bai- bai! I'll catch up with you later, Ranma-bakaaaa!" "Urrhhh!" "Shampoo! You go kill Akane," Ukyou said in a reasonable tone. "I'll stay here and make sure that Ranma stays out of trouble." "Good plan. I kill Akane now!" Ukyou waited until Shampoo had vaulted down the stairs to start laughing. She reached out and grabbed Ranma's hand and began to lead him to the guest room. "Ohh, gotta keep you out of trouble, Sugar. I think I know of a few ways." "Urrr?" Shampoo skidded to a halt at the bottom of the stairway once she realized what she had done and charged right back up the stairs just before Ukyou managed to drag Ranma into the room. "YOU NO TRICK SHAMPOO LIKE THAT!!!!" "I wouldn't dream of tricking you, Shampoo! I was just going to take care of Ranma while you took care of Akane." "Shampoo know *exactly* what 'take care of' mean!" "Well, we have him alone now," Ukyou said. "Why don't we ask him who he really loves?" "That right! Who Airen love?" "Urrr..." Ranma looked back and forth between the two girls and began to sweat. "Say you love me, Ranchan!" "Say you love Shampoo!" "RRrrrr...." Ranma growled, clearly lost in indecision. The beast that currently inhabited Ranma's intellect knew that while the two in front of him were indeed lovely, he would have to pick one. There was also the memory of bluish-black hair and temperamental pink lips causing havoc in his super-aroused mind. Ranma was frozen, unable to decide. "He's completely non-verbal," Nabiki said, climbing back up the stairs. "You'll have to eliminate some of the competition before he'll be able to perform. For the low, low price of only 5000 yen apiece, I'll watch him and you two can go *eliminate* Akane." "How we know Nabiki no take advantage of Ranma?" "He's my brother-in-law! Seriously. Now, pony up..." Both girls reached into their pockets and paid the girl. Nabiki quickly counted through the wrinkled notes and pointed down stairs. "Akane's headed in the direction of the high-school. If you hurry, you can catch her." The two girls ran down the stairs and out of the house. They ran headlong towards the school. Furinkan was actually in sight when Ukyou actually cleared her head long enough to realize what Nabiki had said. "Oh no..." "What? What?" Shampoo demanded. Ukyou grit her teeth in ire. *He's my brother-in-law*, Nabiki had said. "Spatula girl know something," Shampoo said, shaking the chef's shoulders. "Give!" Ukyou bit down her gall and faced the amazon directly. "I don't think that Akane would hide at the school. It's too open... Akane's too wily for that. She's a tough girl like that. Maybe..." "Maybe what?" "Akane's going to be hiding in a place we least suspect." "Where?!?" Shampoo asked. Up above, the late evening sky began to darken and lighting flashed ominously. "One of our restaurants," Ukyou said. "You check out the Nekohanten, and I'll check Ucchan's. Hurry, before it's too late!" Shampoo nodded and ran off. Ukyou turned and ran, but not for Ucchan's. * * * "Tee-hee!" Akane giggled. "They're gone, sis!" Nabiki encouraged the girl as she stepped out of the closet. "Ranma-bakaaa!" Akane cooed before she sprinted up the stairs." Nabiki ran after her, just in time to see Akane drag the incoherent Ranma into her room. She hopped back down the stairs and ran for the front closet. "Oh lordy!" Nabiki exclaimed. "What an opportunity. I better get the camcorder ready before they begin!" "Oh, Ranma!" Akane exclaimed from inside her room in a voice loud enough to carry through the entire house. "It's sooo big!" Soun, who was standing in the middle of the tea-room, looked up at the ceiling with a pained expression on his face. Tears were running freely from his eyes and he unashamedly wiped his nose and face with the sleeve of his dark cotton gi. "Oh, Akane! You're such a big girl now," the man wailed. "You're mother would be so proud!" Genma, standing nearby, grunted in agreement, his face similarly affected. "Oooh! Squeeze harder!" Akane screamed. "No!" Kasumi shouted from across the tea-room. "I'll not allow it! Akane's too young to become a woman!" "Daughter," Soun countered, dodging in front of his eldest and the bokken she carried. "You must allow your sister her... her..." "Oh, Ranma! Now, Ranma! Yeehaa!!!" "Urr..." Soun stared at the ceiling in shock. "If he hurts her, I'll be very cross!" Kasumi warned. "Kasumi, dear," Nodoka placed a petite hand on her shoulder. "Aunty, what--?" Before Kasumi could speak, Nodoka, who was clad only in a skimpy lace teddy and thigh-high stockings had the girl hogtied and bound to the table. Kasumi looked up in horror. "Aunty!!!" "This is for the best, Kasumi. You see, I too have consumed a Passion Dumpling and know the hidden fires which it ignites. Genma!" Nodoka's voice was like the crack of a whip. "Yes, dear!!" "Akane and Ranma must be allowed to continue their--" "Oh yessss! Deeper, Ranma! Harder!!! Oh, GOD!!!!" "Ahem..." Nodoka continued as it started to rain outside. "I see no problem there, Take me to bed, Husband." "Absolutely!" Genma picked up the woman, threw her over his shoulder and ran upstairs to the guest room, her feet kicking in excitement. "Father," Kasumi commanded. "Untie me so I can go save Akane!" "Urrr...." "Father!" "Please don't hate me!" Soun wailed, choosing discretion as the better part of valor. He ran off, leaving a yellow streak in his wake. "Nabiki! Untie me right now!" "Ohhhyesohyessssohhhh.... OOHHHHRAAAANMAAAAAAAA!!!!!" "Okay," Nabiki said, chuckling. "I think Akane's had a chance to get what she wanted so--" "Not so fast, Miss Tricky!" Ukyou shouted as she burst into the room. "Where's Ranma?" "AAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA OOOOOOOOO YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!" "Vocal, Isn't she?" Nabiki said, thinking aloud. "That girl has *got* to learn to tone it down." "Nooooooooooooo...." Ukyou wailed, collapsing to her knees. The large battle spatula she had been weilding bent in her hands. Nabiki chuckled and glanced toward the ceiling. "Again, Ranma-baka!" Akane shouted. "Yes! I think you can move my ankles--- Yes! Just like that!!" "This is your fault, Nabiki!" Ukyou growled, tossing aside her ruined spatula. She leapt at the middle Tendou girl, who barely managed to dodge. "Sorry, no refunds!" "Die, bitch!" Ukyou belted Nabiki in the face, knocking the girl to the floor. Nabiki sat up, probing at her injured eye. She saw the killing expression on Ukyou's face and darted from the room. "Sorry, Kasumi! Gotta run! Need to stay alive. Bye!" "Come back, you whore!" Ukyou bellowed running after. "Somebody untie meee!" Kasumi pleaded. "Oh, yes, Ranma! Tie me up! Oooh! Tighter!!!!" Kasumi began to weep. * * * Several hours later, Akane opened her bedroom window to see a little purple cat meowing piteously in the back yard of the Tendou residence. It was still raining, and the cat looked like a drowned rat. Without pity, Akane grinned wicked and threw a glassful of ice water out the window at the mourning kitty. "Oh, Shampoo's in heat. Go home, pussy-cat," Akane called out. "There's nothing for you here!" "Miaaaaaaaaaaawwwwww...." * * * "I... I really said all those things?" Akane's hand went to her mouth in shock. Nabiki nodded. "And probably some I don't remember." "Aunty really tied up Kasumi?" "You better belive it. Your oldest sister is not a happy camper this morning, so I'd watch out." Akane breathed a sigh of regret. "I'm not a virgin any more. Oh..." "You had fun, didn't you?" Nabiki asked. "It certainly sounded like it, at any rate. You've lost me a bet, you know. I was supposed to be the first of the three of us to get laid." Akane nodded thoughtfully. "What will Ranma think of me now?" The changeroom door slammed open and Ranma, as a girl, darted inside in a panic. She dove into the dirty clothes hamper and started shaking "Oh god, Oh god, I'm gonna die..." "What?" Nabiki asked. "Kasumi *yelled* at me!" Ranma said in horror. "Something 'bout hurting Akane. Both our dads have gone nuts. They're planning a wedding or something. Oh man... this is bad..." "Hmm... They wouldn't have any reason at all to start planning a wedding, would they, lover boy?" Nabiki teased. "What?" Ranma asked stupidly. "Don't you remember?" Akane asked. "Remember what?" Ranma said. "Keep you hands off Akane, you little pervert!" Kasumi yelled, breaking into the changeroom, swinging her bokken like a pro. "YIPE!" Ranma screamed and ran away, Kasumi following just after. "He... He... He doesn't remember," Akane said, all the emotion draining out of her voice. Nabiki winced in sympathy. "It must have been the spice. He was pretty incoherent by the time the two of you got down to cases last night." She looked at the crestfallen expression on her sister's face. "I'm sorry, Akane. At least you've beaten the other girls." Akane nodded, her face pointed down at the floor and her fists clenched and shaking. "They'll pay for this," Akane swore. "They'll pay..." Nabiki nodded in agreement. "I swear, Akane. I'll help you extract your rev--" "Oh, but first," Akane declared. "But First..." "But first?" "First, I'm going to give Ranma something he'll remember! Oh, Ranma-bakaaaaa!" ------------------------------ The cast of Ranma 1/2 was created by Rumiko Takahashi. They're used here without permission.