Dark Queen Urd said, "Well, I'm going to have to hurry up my plans before my incompetent sister gets beaten by all those new Senshi..." General Fabioite said, "Well, after I finish my photo shoot, we can get in your usual orgy and..." "Not THOSE plans. I MUST get the other two orgasm crystals. I must." "Why?" "So I can become the LIVING KAMA SUTRA!" "Just making sure the readers haven't forgotten." "We have one. And now I am certain I have located the remaining two. And just to make it convenient...they're in the same place." "So you want me to get them?" "Yes." "But I'll miss my photo shoot! 'Misery's Long-Lost Pirate Love' is supposed to hit the stands in a month, and..." "If I turn you into a cow, you'll NEVER make the shoot, now will you?" "As my queen commands." ***************************************************************************** Mornings after are always messy. Especially when its the morning after you tried to have sex about ten times before someone actually did it right, and you did it in the same bed all those times. Especially when it's not actually YOUR bed. Especially when two of the three people involved change sex... Negiri moaned faintly and woke up. Her vision was fuzzy...because she wasn't wearing her glasses. Where am I? she wondered. She suddenly realized several soft and squishy things were in bed with her. They were warm. They were...people. Futaba and Misaki were curled up around her. She blushed. Oh God, we must have...which means...She contemplated fainting for dramatic effect, but with no audience, why bother? Futaba mumbled something, leaned over and kissed her. Negiri sighed. Might as well face the bomb now..."Good morning, Futaba-kun. Good morning, Misaki-chan." They both muttered, "Good morning, Negiri-chan", then their eyes snapped awake. She smiled nervously, "Uh...hi." They stared at each other. "We...did we..." Negiri nodded. Might as well make the best of this. "Yeah. It was great too." She wrapped an arm around each of them. "Probably would have been even better if I wasn't drunk and you two weren't acting a bit crazed..." "At least no one saw us change," Futaba said, then paused. "No one saw us change...right?" "Everyone was drunk and passed out or left by that point." Negiri idly ran a finger up and down Futaba's chest. He shuddered slightly. "So..." Misaki said. "I...you...uh..." The door opened. Makoto stuck her head in. "You three awake yet?" Misaki tried to cover herself with the sheets, then realized she was already covered. "We...uh...yeah." Makoto smiled. "Well, breakfast is ready, unless you three plan to..." Futaba shook his head. "No, no, it's not what you think..." Makoto smiled. "Don't feel ashamed. I like it both ways too. We won't make fun of you. It's perfectly normal." Misaki said nervously, "It is?" Makoto said, "Well, I was in bed with Ranma and Ukyou last night, if you know what I mean." Negiri oooohed. "I'm jealous." Misaki felt a full body blush coming on, followed by the change, just at the thought. He sighed. "Aargh." Makoto blinked. "Hmm. Whole lot of that sort of thing going around, I guess. Well, if you ever want an interesting time...We enjoy experimenting." She winked. "Well, come eat breakfast as soon as you get dressed. She paused on the way out. "Or you could come naked, if you really want to..." Futaba blushed and changed this time. Visions of future orgies filled her head. ***************************************************************************** Later in the day, Misaki-kun went over to Futaba's house with Futaba-chan. They'd dropped Negiri off at her house on the way there. As they walked in, Futana was there. "Hmm, dyed your hair, Misaki-kun? Or is that natural?" "It seems to be natural. I don't know why my hair has started changing too." Misaki-kun said. "We were going to talk to Mr. Shimeru about it." "Good luck. I have a date with some cutie over in the Nerima district." "What's her name?" Futaba asked. "Shiratori Azusa. She doesn't look too bright, but..." "Well, any girl who'd date you isn't too bright, Futana," Futaba-chan said before Futana punted her down the hall. "Hmph. Who asked you anyway." She stormed out into the yard, transforming as she left. With a bit of searching around the house, they managed to locate Mr. Shimeru, who was busy reading the newspaper. "Hello, there." "Mr. Shimeru...I have a question." "42." He went back to the paper. Misaki-kun paused, uncertain how to reply to that. "Umm. Actually, it had to do with my changing...I've never had my hair change before." "Probably it's just a minor hormone thing or something. I could take you to see the family doctor, just in case." "Well, I guess I ought to meet him," Misaki-kun said. ***************************************************************************** Dr. Tofu looked up as the new patients arrived. "Hello, Mr. Shimeru. Hello, Futaba-kun." He then noticed Misaki. "Why, you must be Misaki. Nice to meet you!" Misaki looked around. "You're a chiropractor?" "That's my specialty, but I do a little of everything." He got out some official looking charts. "I did some tests on the last blood sample I have from you, and I think I know what the problem is." "Okay, what is it?" She sat down, as did Futaba and Mr. Shimeru. "Well, after running some genetic testing, I believe that certain latent tendencies in your genetics have become activated." "What?" "You possess the changing gene, but it normally has to be inherited from BOTH parents to become active. However..." Misaki blinked. "I possess the gene?" "Yes, but it is a recessive gene. You possess the proper capabilities to secrete the appropriate hormones, but it would never become active unless..." She paused. "Unless I started taking the hormone and..." "Woke it up so to speak. I think within about three months, you'll no longer require the shot at all." "What if I stopped taking the shots?" "Probably it would take six months for your body to reach the mature level of the change." Misaki tried to calm down, but it wasn't working. "In other words, I'm going to go on changing for the rest of my life, no matter what." Dr. Tofu nodded. "That about sums it up. I'm sorry. I should have tested your genetics before we started, but this gene is so rare..." Futaba hugged Misaki, "At least you won't need to get shots anymore, eh?" Yeah, that's real comforting, he thought. She sighed. "Well, at least I still have you." If Mr. Shimeru says something about being part of the family... Mr. Shimeru smiled. "It was fate. Welcome to the family, Misaki-chan." Misaki was about to knock him into orbit, when she realized that would be out of character and had Futaba knock him into orbit instead. ***************************************************************************** The madam of the Red Star brothel was quite surprised to find herself hanging upside down from her favorite chandolier, tied in place by a ribbon around her ankles while a girl in a gymnastics outfit used her as a pinata. Her enforcers lay scattered about, battered unconscious. This is the last time I buy from budget slavers, she thought. Kodachi smiled. "Let's see if you have candy inside." The woman began to scream. *************************************************************************** Some things in life are inevitable. As soon as Ranma first slept with Minako, he realized that sooner or later, he'd end up in bed with all the Sailors. There wasn't any point in resisting fate. Especially not when fate involved a huge amount of pleasure. Ranma still hadn't quite gotten the hang of mass orgies, but he was starting to really get the hang of having sex with two women at the same time. It helped that there just seemed to be an inadequate supply of men with the endurance to do the job. At least who were also fairly sane. He, Rei, and Usagi were tangled on the bed, trying to do what one of Ami's erotic databases refers to as, "Climbing Mount Fuji". The hardest part had been propping Rei's bed up against the wall so that it was at a 40 degree angle to the floor, and then not falling off the bed or knocking it down in the progress. As it was, they'd had to tie Usagi's ponytails to the bedposts to keep her from falling off the bed. They would have tied Ranma's pig-tail to the posts too, but it wasn't long enough. Bad enough he'd almost fallen off at one point and Rei had caught him by it. Luckily, at that point, Usagi had pushed the wrong button on the Shining Sexy Swiss Army Moon Sceptre, and they'd found out it had a climbing cable and grappling hook built in, so now they had something to grab onto besides each other if they started to slide. "MORE!!!!!" Usagi-chan screamed as Ranma's engorged member stabbed into her again and again. She could feel herself building towards orgasm. Unseen by any of them, their orgasm crystals were pulsating and building towards a release. Unseen by them, eyes were watching... Rei clung to Ranma's back with her legs, busilly pleasuring herself with her hands, waiting for it to be her turn again, relaxing in the afterglow of the orgasm, that even if it had happened off screen, had at least been satisfying, even if Usagi had accidentally bit her hand in the middle of it. Just as Ranma and Usagi started to come at the same time, in an ever so convenient fashion, a pair of hands darted in and grabbed their orgasm crystals. They howled in frustration, caught at the edge of orgasm and unable to cross over. Rei whipped her head around and looked. It was General Fabioite. And twenty five Condominiums. "Hi there. You'll note that today's theme is overwhelming force...I really should have thought of this a long time ago." "You BASTARD! Couldn't you at have at least let them finish?" Rei screamed. He shrugged. "I'm not risking becoming a cow. Condominiums. Finish them." He vanished in a spray of romance novel covers. The Condominiums charged in. Rei lept off the bed, bounced off the head of one Condominium, landed, rolled, and grabbed her transformation pen. "MARS STAR POWER, MAKE UP!" She transformed into a rather buttnaked Sailor Mars. Ranma did the same thing. "CALLISTO STAR POWER, MAKE UP!" The Condominiums paused and wondered if Ranma had really just changed sex. Usagi tried to jump for her broach...then realized her pony-tails were still tied to the bed. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA" Several lustful Condominiums staggered backwards, repelled by the sheer power of her screaming. Mars and Callisto began blasting Condominiums to bits. Soon, the other Sailors began piling into the room, most of them also bucknaked except for Tiaras. It had been a busy night... ************************************************************************** Dark Queen Urd cackled. She held the three Ultimate Orgasm crystals. "Now, we must complete the ritual. But first...we need to capture the Sailors so that we can force them to watch my triumph. I shall become the LIVING KAMA SUTRA AND RULE THE UNIVERSE!" She cackled. "But my Queen...how shall we capture them? The other generals have all run off and taken oaths of celibacy after being defeated one too many times by the Sailors. They grow stronger by the day." Dark Queen Urd said, "I just ordered five cases of Condominiums from the Dark Trojan Corporation. That should do it." They both cackled evilly together. ************************************************************************** Ami finished scanning Usagi and Ranma. "Yes, they took your orgasm crystals. Everything else seems to be here, though." Makoto paled. "He can't orgasm until we get it back?" Usagi began to cry. Ranma began to cry. Heck, EVERYONE began to cry. It seemed like the thing to do at the time. Rei growled. "I'm going to find Dark Queen Urd and pull out her intestines through her ears for this!" Akane nodded. "I'll chop off her toes with an axe!" "I'll sever her eyelids!" "I'll bite off her arm!" "I'll make her eat Akane's cooking." Ranma got malleted for that. *************************************************************************** Ami finished running a program on her computer. "I think I've finally located the best site to teleport to Dark Queen Urd's stronghold from." And finally hacked into Donald Trump's swiss bank account. Time to make me some money. Right as the Sailors joined hands and prepared to teleport, 3000 Condominiums appeared, along with Major Spamite in Ami's backyard, preparing to attack. To his suprise, the Sailors shouted "Sailor Teleport" and vanished. He sighed and decided to go hit the town instead. "Well, if we go back, we'll be executed...so everyone go get laid! At least, we'll die happy!" A horde of horny Condominiums rushed out into the town. It would be...a night to remember. *************************************************************************** Dark Queen Urd and General Fabioite were in bed, warming up, as the Sailors appeared. "Put your hands up and don't try anything pleasurable!" Sailor Moon shouted. "Give us the orgasm crystals now!" "Or what?" "Or we'll grind your bones to make our bread!" Sailor Mars shouted. "We'll make BAD sausage out of you!" Sailor Venus shouted. "We'll force you to listen to the complete Bob Dillon collection," Sailor Spatula said. Dark Queen Urd paled. This could be bad. "It's too late! You've just come to see my FINAL TRIUMPH!" She gestured, and the Impenetrable Forcefield (TM) she had had her sister install the other day kicked in. The Sailors futilely blasted, kicked, and punched the forcefield, while being forced to watch Dark Queen Urd and General Fabioite perform the entire Kama Sutra before their eyes. This took a VERY long time. The three orgasm crystals glowed brighter and brighter. After a while, Sailor Mercury gave up and just started taking notes. Finally, the three Orgasm Crystals rose into the air and began to spin around the writhing bodies on the bed. The Sailors watched, horrified and turned on at the same time. Usagi and Ranma, however, didn't feel particularly aroused at all, so they kept whaling away on the forcefield. The final orgasm came. Dark Queen Urd screamed with pleasure and the crystals flashed. The power washed over her. Yes, this was it...this was her triumph... *************************************************************************** The dark room, Dark Queen Skuld's ultimate trap teleported into the sun. She cackled as it burned to ash. Well, that would finish them off. No more worries. She went off to go have a tub of ice cream to celebrate. The Legion of Substitute Sailors, however, fled out the door, right as the room teleported into the sun. They found themselves in the REAL Volcano room. They could see all the tied up hostages. They were still hanging from a laundry line over a volcano. Saint Patrick, Godzilla, Kahm, Rachel, Amy, Raye, Lita, Serena, Mina, Luna, Dr. Sam Beckett, Artemis, Number Six, Reenie, Tuxedo Mask, Ted Turner, Andrew, Rita, Melvin, Molly, Molly's mother, Hercules the cat, Grandpa, Chad, Sammy, Serena's Mom and Dad, the New Number Two, Miss Haruna, Steven King, the entire cast of Full House, and a little black dog were all tied to the sagging rope. The Sailors rushed forward and swiftly started rescuing the hostages. Luckily, the line was rigged up so you could just pull the line and it would move towards the side you pulled it from, so they started rotating it and bringing their friends, family, relatives, and passersby to safety. Just as Sailor Charon helped lift Steven King off the line and onto the side of the volcano, her scythe slipped and fell, slicing the rope. The cast of Full House plummeted into the volcano. So did Toto. Sailor Hermes moved like a blinding blur of speed, stealing a few special effects from the Flash. She leaped off the head of the annoying twins and grabbed Toto, then ran UP the rope to safety, letting the minions of evil plunge into cleansing lava. Sailor Saturn said, "Good job, Hermes. You spared me the effort of killing them myself." There was MUCH rejoicing. ***************************************************************************** Dark Queen Belldandy sat impatiently, waiting for them to finish filming her sister's big scene. Akemi came in. "Well, how are you going to achieve ultimate victory?" "Well, I finally came up with the right plan." "Which is?" "I'm going to capture the Merchant Marines and..." "Who?" Dark Queen Belldandy paused. "The Sailor Senshi...I always get them confused." "And how do you plan to capture them?" "Well, you know, my sister pointed out that if I use all my minions at once, it's harder to beat them than if they come at the Senshi two or three at a time. I can't believe I never thought of that." "It's a genre thing." *************************************************************************** Dark Queen Urd glowed. The power of the Kama Sutra flowed through her. She became the Living Kama Sutra. Her power was complete. Fabiote blinked as Dark Queen Urd turned into a large, ornately decorated volume, which was warm to the touch and seemed to somehow be breathing. The Living Kama Sutra. The three orgasm crystals glowed, then flew back into their possessors, who simultaneously came...which was really embarrassing. Well, two of them came. The other crystal flew off to try and find Kasumi. The Forcefield shorted out. Fabioite looked at the book, then at the angry Senshi. "I wonder if this how they made the Living Bible...probably not." Fabioite's word for the day was about to be...pain. Serious pain. ***************************************************************************** Kodachi returned home. Vengeance WILL be mine, she thought. But first, I think I'll have some cake. *****************************************************************************