Author's Note: Has anyone besides me noticed that all of my fics so far have
been either inspired by a song or contains the lyrics of a song somewhere in the
text?  Okay, I thought it was just me ^_^ heheh.  Anyways, here is part one of
my sequel to "Changes".  If you haven't read that story, I'd suggest doing that
before jumping into this one--you won't really understand what's going on here.
Okay, enough of my rambling, on with the story.

Key:
* = emphasis
~ = lyrics
<> = thoughts
<~~> = telepathy/telepathic conversation
% = flashbacks

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CRASH & BURN by Ryoko Saotome

<It's been almost a year now,> Ranma thought with a small frown as he walked
past the long-abandoned Nekohanten.  <Almost a year since the old ghoul and the
bitch sold Mu-chan.>

The thought of what had happened to his much-loved friend still filled him with
rage, even all these many months later.  Mousse had been beaten and raped
numerous times before he and Ryoga had located the encampment and made certain
that no one would ever be put through that torture again.  Ryoga had certainly
done a thorough job on the bastards--there was nothing left for the authorities
to investigate, and destruction of the compound was chalked up to arson.

What worried Ranma the most was the change that had taken place in Mousse.  He
had made a full physical recovery, but emotionally he'd been shattered.  The
once-proud Amazon warrior had become skittish and suspicious of everyone.  Even
now, nearly ten months later, the only people he fully trusted were Ryoga, Ranma
himself, Akane, and Nodoka--and the only reason for *that* was because of her
being Ranma's mother.

The pigtailed martial artist shook his head and continued towards the school,
half-hoping that something, *anything* would happen.  It had been way too quiet
lately, especially since Tatewaki Kuno had given up pursuit of his 'pigtailed
goddess' to concentrate his efforts on 'the beauteous Tsubasa Kurenai'.  Ranma
couldn't help but feel sorry for the crossdresser--even if he wore the boys'
uniform (which was becoming more and more often due to Kuno's pursuit), he was
still delicate-looking enough to pass for female, and thus couldn't get away
from the kedonist.

Unbeknownst to Ranma, something *was* about to happen.  And it could possibly
hinder Mousse's erstwhile recovery.

~~^~~^^~~^~~^^~~^~~

% FLASHBACK (Alone) %

<Why don't they kill me?  I wish they would kill me.  Please, God, let this
end.>

~ When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you ~

It wasn't the first time he'd had thoughts like this.  It wouldn't be the last.

Mousse shivered in the corner of the room, desperately wishing that his
tormentors would go too far today, that their 'attentions' would progress beyond
the point he could take them and that he would find a release from this hell
he'd been sold into.

<Shampoo, I never thought you could hate me this much.>

~ Give me a moment please to tame your wild wild heart ~

Shampoo.  He didn't want to think about her, but his thoughts were drawn to her.
That beautiful lavender hair and gentle violet eyes... no.  her eyes held no
trace of gentleness; those eyes regarded him with hatred and contempt.
Something within him died a little, and tears stung his eyes again.  She truly
did hate him; she had allowed him to be forced into this half-life without a
second thought.  Anything to get the stupid duck out of the way so that she
could have her precious Ranma.

<ranma... do you even know i'm gone?  do you care?>

The door creaked open, and the Amazon shuddered involuntarily.  The man who'd
walked into the room closed the door behind him and locked it to ensure that
there would be no disturbances.  He then moved towards the boy shivering in the
corner and pulled him roughly to his feet.  Mousse gave a startled cry, and
received a stinging slap for his efforts.

"Damn it, I was *so* hoping that I wouldn't mar that pretty face of yours
today," the man--no, *monster*--said in a cruel, mocking tone.  "It's so much
nicer when you relax and cooperate.  Why won't you cooperate?"


Mousse said nothing, only touched his face where the blood was beginning to
trickle from an old cut.  The man who had a firm grip on his arm growled and
threw the boy on the ground.  Before he could struggle to a less vulnerable
position, the man was on his back, tearing at the remains of clothing he still
wore.

"You had to do this the hard way, didn't you?" the man almost purred in Mousse's
ear, undoing his own pants and pressing closer to the Amazon.  "I'm beginning to
think that you *like* the pain."

"... please... don't..." Mousse begged quietly, unable to trust his voice as he
struggled to free himself.  There came another stinging slap, then the man
plunged into him.  The Chinese boy's screams of pain and despair were muffled by
the hand that was suddenly clamped over his mouth.  There was no gentleness in
the manner in which he was taken, and the pain was unbearable.  All Mousse could
do was cry as the man slammed into his body again and again, and he winced as
the man came within him.

The man pulled out roughly and shoved the Amazon back to the floor.  Mousse
curled up into a ball and shivered, his tears falling freely.  He'd long ago
stopped trying to hide them, for they were his only means of release here.  The
words spoken behind him made him shudder:

"I'm not through with you today.  You *will* learn your place, my pet."

Footsteps retreated, then the door opened and was locked again from the outside.

~ I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you
It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold ~

<Please let me die.  Please, God, let me die before he comes back,> he thought
desperately.

<Hang in there a little longer, Mousse-chan.>

The words strengthened him a little.  They weren't his own, but had been spoken
within his mind several weeks ago.  He wasn't sure how much longer he could hold
on, but he would try.

Damn it, he would hold on as long as it took.

~ When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you can't take anymore
Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night ~

<please...> he thought as he collapsed into unconsciousness, <please... I can't
last much longer... ryoga....>

~ If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
You're not alone ~

% END FLASHBACK %

Mousse sat up in bed, choking back a scream.  It was morning already, and from
the looks of the room, he was the last one in the house to awaken.  Ranma had
school that day--just because he was living with Ryoga now was no reason to drop
out, despite his protests to the contrary--and he had no idea where Ryoga could
be.  It had to be nearby, though; the sudden wave of comfort and calmness that
swept over him certainly was *not* his own.  Not after that dream again.

He shivered as he remembered it.  There had been so many nights and days when he
knew nothing but intense pain and suffering.  Sometimes the men had been
satisfied with beating him nearly lifeless; other times, far too often, they'd
used his body to relieve their own sexual desires.  Sometimes they'd done both.

<~Mousse-chan...?~>

<Damn it, I forgot he could do that,> Mousse thought as he jumped and turned to
find Ryoga watching him intently from the door.

Ryoga frowned at the pale, still-too-thin Amazon youth wrapped in the blankets.
He looked so fragile any more, despite his physical recovery.  His lack of trust
in anyone save his immediate 'family' worried the Lost Boy to no end--the other
boy had once been a warrior, and a good one despite his handicap.  But now...
Shampoo had destroyed that innocence in the boy, and had taught him that it was
safer to keep others at arm's length.

"You okay?" he asked aloud, not wanting to startle Mousse again.  The other boy
was silent for a long time, and when he did answer, Ryoga was stunned by the
honest admission:

"No.  Haven't been for a long time now."

Mousse sighed and fell back onto the bed, closing his eyes and trying to block
the images that came unbidden to his mind.  Any other time when Ryoga'd asked
that exact same question, he would have said 'yeah, just a nightmare' or 'I'll
be fine, really'.  Well, he was tired of trying to deal with it himself.  He was
unconsciously reaching out to someone he knew he could trust, and desperately
hoping that the bandanna'd martial artist would take the initiative.

The bed shifted slightly as Ryoga sat down next to his friend.  Mousse had
always said he had to do this himself, had to face the nightmares alone in order
to be free.  He hadn't thought *that* was a good thing to do, but had stayed
nearby and given the other boy his love and support, as had Ranma.

<~Ranma.~>

<~Hai, itoshii?~>

Ryoga frowned slightly.  He wondered briefly if he was doing the right thing.

<~I'm going to have a little talk with Mousse,~> he finally said through the
link he and the younger martial artist shared.  <~I'll fill you in when you get
home from school, okay?~>

<~Hai.~>  The relief in Ranma's thoughts was unmistakable.  <~I've been worried
about our Amazon.  Oops, gotta cut this short, I just caught site of Tatchi
stalking poor Tsubasa again!~>

Ryoga shook his head, smiling slightly, before turning his attention back to the
boy lying on the bed.  By this time, Mousse had rolled over onto his side away
from the Lost Boy.  He frowned, then lightly laid a hand on the other boy's
shoulder.  Mousse started a bit, then turned his head to gaze back at Ryoga.
There were unshed tears in his blue-grey eyes, and the pain within those depths
was heartbreaking.

"Care to talk about it?" he asked softly, not wanting to force the Amazon to
speak.

The Chinese youth blinked at the wandering martial artist, one tear managing to
escape, then drew in a breath and began to tell his friend the whole
story....(^)

~~^~~^^~~^~~^^~~^~~

"I can't believe what I'm seeing," Ukyou said, trying to smother her laughter
before it began.  Ranma and Akane blinked at the okinamiyaki chef in confusion,
then followed her gaze across the schoolyard.  Kuno had just managed to corner
Tsubasa and had glomped onto the younger boy (who was actually dressed in the
boys' uniform that day).

"I wonder what he'll do once he figures out Tsu-chan's a guy," Ranma mused
aloud, smirking a bit.  He had been troubled all day, ever since he'd received
the message from Ryoga that he was going to get Mousse to talk about what had
happened to him.  The Kuno/Tsubasa situation, however, never ceased to amuse
him.

Everyone who was watching the scene with the young kedonist and the younger
'girl' began to cheer when 'she' effectively flipped him and proceeded to pound
him into the ground.  Nabiki smirked and began to collect the money she'd won on
the fight--she wasn't dumb enough to think that Tsubasa would just stand around
and *let* Tatewaki grope him!

"GO, TSUBASA!" Akane shouted with a laugh before she turned back to Ukyou and
Ranma.  "I swear, one of these days Kuno's gonna figure out that Tsubasa isn't
female, then all hell's gonna break loose."

"You're right, sugar," Ukyou agreed, wiping the tears from her face.  "I'm
putting my money on Tsubasa in *that* fight, too!"

Ranma opened his mouth to speak when suddenly his smile disappeared, only to be
replaced by a vicious glare.  The two girls sitting with him blinked and
followed his gaze.  Their breath caught in their throats, and they turned
worried eyes back to their friend.

"I--I can't believe it!" Akane whispered, glancing back over her shoulder.

"How *dare* she show her face again after-" Ukyou began, only to be interrupted
by the new topic of their conversation--and the recipient of Ranma's ire:

"Nihoa!"

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(^) This is hinted at in the "alone" flashback, and also in the fic "Changes" in
flashback form.  I may get around to writing about what happened to Mousse
someday, but just not at the moment.

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PART ONE OWARI