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I do not own Gold Digger and its associated characters. They belong to that marvelous fellow Fred Perry. I do not own Ranma ½ and its associated characters. They belong to the wonderful lady Rumiko Takahashi. This production is strictly for entertainment, and I am not making any money off of the writings. I am just a poor student, so please… Don't sue me… Please?
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Special Disclaimer:
“All My Diggers” is paying homage to the Ranma ½ & Sailor Moon Fanfiction, “All My Outers”. I was talking with Psyckosama about his fics and works and he asked me to do this, made it into an author challenge really. So I write this fic not for great story value, but for pure enjoyment.
You can find Psykosama's works at http://www.fanfic.net/~psyckosama
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All My Diggers Chapter 3: Shop Non-Descript Chinese Pharmaceuticals Store, for All Your Amazon Needs!
Ranma groaned lightly as he lay on a couch in the Diggers’ living room, the Diggers sisters, his wives were near him. After hearing Theo’s explanation, Ranma had laid there a good hour, wondering if him getting married to the Diggers sisters really was some interstellar cosmic-joke. With a sigh, Ranma spoke softly.
Ranma: I can’t believe this. Dad sold me out again, and I actually ended up fulfilling one of those stinkin’ engagements.
It was then that Ranma felt a hand touch his shoulder gently. Turning his head, he saw that it was Britanny.
Britanny: Well, I wouldn’t call this engagement ‘stinking’.
Ranma nodded his head and sighed.
Ranma: Yeah. I don’t mean it like that. It’s just a real kick in the butt knowing that I unintentionally followed through with one of the actual promises that Genma made to compromise my family’s honor, you know?
Gina (Nods her head): True. But, hey, look at it this way. You’re also not exactly in a loveless marriage either. I mean. We all have feelings for you. Am I right ladies?
Britanny (Nods head rapidly): Yes.
Brianna: Most definitely.
Letting out a little sigh, Ranma was surprised by how hearing that made him feel a little better. Perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad, being married to these girls.
It was then a certain aspect of the room caught Ranma’s attention.
Ranma: Hey! Where’d Mr. And Mrs. Diggers go?
Gina: Mom took dad out to, as she put it, ‘have a little talk with him.’
Brianna: Which translates as, ‘Dad’s gonna get an ass-whupping.’
Blinking his eyes once, then twice, Ranma wondered if it was natural for the wife to be the domineering person in a relationship. Heck, that’s how it seemed to be with his own parents. It was then a scary thought hit Ranma.
Ranma (Thinks): If these three try to take control, I’m as good as dead…
Ranma closed his eyes and sighed. This was literally the strangest day of his short life. And he thought when he got hit with the Jusenkyo Curse with the first time was bad and that life couldn’t get any worse. This was just way out of his league. He wakes up with not only blurry memory of the past week, in bed, (naked) with three women, (also naked) whom happened to be his WIVES!
Ranma: Girls… If I see anyone from Nerima again, I think I’m going to end up being as good as dead…
Britanny: Don’t worry, Ranma. We’ll stick up for you.
Feeling Britanny pat his shoulder some more, Ranma looked up at Britanny and smiled gently at her in appreciation for the kind words.
Ranma: Thank you, Brit.
Britanny: No problem.
After long moments of silence, Gina spoke up to break the tension that was starting to form between the four of them there.
Gina: Hey, maybe we should try to remember what happened? I mean, I remember we had to go down to Japan to get parts for a space-craft, but after that, it’s really kind of a blur for me, and I‘m sure, for the rest of you as well.
Ranma: Yeah. I can barely remember what I was doing before everything turned to this. I have some idea of what I might have been doing, but I’m really not sure. I mean, hell, for all I know, I could have been fighting, running from Akane’s cooking, or something!
Britanny: I know what you mean. I slightly remember walking with my sisters through Nerima so we could get to someplace to pick up those parts… What was the place again?
Gina: Mishima Heavy Industries, Limited.
Britanny: Right. I remember walking and then… Well… I kinda go blank.
Brianna: Hmm… I have the same slight remembrance of walking. But after that… Nada. Zip. Zilch. Do not pass go, do not collect two-hundred dollars.
Gina: Hmm… What the heck were we all doing? We were in no position to get married and start screwing each others’ brains out!
Britanny: Speaking of that, where would we get married? I don’t think multiple-marriages are legal in Japan, and I certainly know they’re not legal here.
Gina: Hmm… I’ll have to look through our things and files. Maybe I could find a wedding certificate or something to give us a clue.
Ranma: I know exactly what my mom will say when she finds out I married you three…
Britanny: Let me guess, “So manly!”
Ranma (Nods head): Bingo.
It was then that there was a small flash of memory through all four at once. It wasn’t much, but it was clearer than any of the other memories of that time-frame at the moment, so it hit them like a mach-truck going 70 mph in a 35 mph Zone.
Ranma, Gina, Britanny, & Brianna: The Non-Descript Chinese Pharmaceuticals Store!!!
All four members of the married quarter blinked their eyes in unison. Britanny was first to voice her opinion.
Britanny: ‘The Non-Descript Chinese Pharmaceuticals Store’? What kind of stupid name is that for a store!?
Ranma: I know that place. It opened up for business almost a month after the failed wedding between me and Akane. Some nice, old Chinese guy owns the place. Place is well stocked on all sorts of ‘magical’ items.
Brianna (Eyes Ranma suspiciously): And how would you know that, Ranma? Hmm?
Ranma: Because, they were from China, Brichan. Did you forget I have a Jusenkyo Curse? I checked it out, hoping I could find some possible cure in there. Of course, all they had were the ‘Instant Jusenkyo Spring Waters’. Only one-time use.
Brianna: Ah. Understood.
Brianna then blinked her eyes as a thought hit her.
Brianna: Hey Ranma, did you just call me, ‘Brichan’?
Ranma (Blushes): Er, yeah, I guess…
Gina: ‘Brichan’… Hmm… That sounds like a cute nickname for you, Bri.
Britanny: Hmm… And if I know Ranma well enough, he saves names like that for people he really likes…
Hearing that, one could notice that Brianna’s eyes took on a rather playful gleam to them.
Brianna (Smiles): So, I take it you like me, Ranma?
Ranma began blushing. Thanks to the ‘Phantom Memories’ he and the others were gaining from each other, he knew how ‘energetic’ Brianna was. However, she had asked him a question, and Ranma felt obliged to honestly answer it.
Ranma: Er, yeah Bri.
Ranma then gulped as he saw the smile appear on Brianna’s face. Somehow he knew that smile. And somehow, he knew he that the way this was going, he and Bri were going to be busy for up to eight hours if he didn’t do something, anything!
Ranma: Well, listen, girls, could I use a phone? I mean, I have to call someone at home to let them know I’m okay.
Gina: Sure. What’s the phone number you need to call? I can get it dialed for you.
Ranma was silent for a moment. He wanted to call his mother, but…
Ranma: Oh shoot.
Britanny: Is something wrong?
Ranma: Honestly, I don’t remember the phone number.
Gina: Huh? What do you mean?
Britanny: Are you trying to tell us you don’t remember your home phone!?
Ranma (Blushes): Not really.
Gina: Why not?
Ranma: I just never had reason to call it, you know? I mean, like, I never really spend much time at home. It’s not something I really got to learn, you know?
Britanny (Nods her head): Unfortunately, I do…
Ranma (Cringes): Phantom memories?
Britanny: Yes.
Brianna: And might I add, we don’t even consider Genma our father-in-law!
Ranma (Surprised): You don’t?
Gina, Britanny, & Brianna (Yell): NO!!!
Ranma blinked his eyes once, then twice.
Ranma: Is that because he went and sold me off to you before I was even born, or…
Gina: That and other things.
Brianna: Like taking you away from your mother when you were only a child and making you sign a seppuku contract. That insensitive jerk!
Britanny: Or that damned Neko-Ken. It’s a miracle you’re not away running from me, and screaming your head off in pure terror!
Ranma (Blinks): Hmm… You know, I will admit, I was nervous before, but I’ve kind of gotten used to how you look. I think it might be because you’re not a full cat. I mean, you got cat-like looks, sure, but you’re not in that full cat form of yours.
Britanny nodded her head. She began to make a mental note not to use her full cheetah form around Ranma unless it were absolutely necessary.
The moment of silence seemed to continue for quite some time. It was almost deafening when you consider these four aren’t exactly the most ‘silent’ of people. Just wanting to end the silence, Brianna moved over to Ranma.
Brianna: Hey, Ranma…
Ranma: Yeah, Bri?
Brianna: Can I have my turn now?
Ranma, Gina, & Britanny (Stare at Brianna): Huh?
Brianna: You know, the horizontal mambo! The Adult game of Twister! The Tokyo bullet train going through the flooded tunnel! S! E! X! SEX!
Ranma was blushing deeply. Yep. Brianna was VERY open talking about this sort of thing, probably even more-so than Ranma knew Shampoo to be.
Ranma: Er, well, you see.
Brianna (Pouts): Oh, come on. Gina and Cheetah got their turns.
Ranma blushed deeply. He didn’t have much to argue against that. He DID do THAT with Gina and Britanny earlier.
Ranma (Blushes): Okay, Bri.
Smiling, Brianna began to cheer. Hearing Ranma agree to nookie just made her day.
Brianna: YAY! I’m gonna get laid! I’m gonna get laid! I’mah gonnah getah layaid!
Ranma (Blushes): Er… I wish you wouldn’t do that.
Brianna (Nods head): Sure, sure. Now, onto nookie!
Before Ranma could say another word, Brianna literally picked Ranma up from off the couch. She smiled at her sisters.
Brianna: Gina, Cheetah, I’ll see you two later. Hubby and I going to take some time to get to know each other better.
Not waiting for her sisters to respond, Brianna ran off for her room. She wanted to waste no time with getting it on Ranma.
Britanny and Gina just looked at each other.
Britanny: Well, looks like Bri couldn’t bring herself to wait anymore…
Gina: Yeah, but you have to admit, she had been ‘good’ about it pretty much so far. I mean, she had to watch me and Ranma, and Bri and I could easily hear you and Ranma. And we were downstairs!
Britanny (Blushes): Ranma and I weren’t THAT loud.
Gina (Smirks): I’d beg to differ.
It was then Britanny’s ears perked up slightly. Gina noticed this.
Gina: What do you hear, Cheetah?
Britanny: Phone. Sounds like the one downstairs. i.e. your phone.
Gina (Sighs): Fine. I’ll go and get it. What about you?
Britanny (Shrugs shoulders): I’ll find something to do. Weight training would be good at the moment.
And so, both Diggers sisters leave the room, leaving the living room empty for the time.
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Genn, (still in her female form) was calmly walking down the upstairs hall of the Diggers mansion. She had every intention of finding Séance. She rarely got to spend time with him, and now that Brianna was married, Genn knew she would be getting A LOT more free time. Enough time to possibly try making a relationship with the student of Dr. Theodore Diggers.
Genn (Thinks): Oh Séance, where are you? Time to play…
Genn blinked her eyes as she saw someone literally run up the stairs and keep on charging past her, until the form went into a room and slammed the door closed. A door that happened to have Police Tape, a small poster of a cat skull and crossbones, a ‘Danger: Toxic Material’ sign, and a small plaque that said, “Brianna’s Room” all over the door.
Genn: Well, looks like Brianna isn’t wasting any time with getting to know Ranma some more. The poor guy.
Genn shivered. While she felt slightly guilty for Ranma, hey, better him than her.
Genn: Oh Séance! Where are you? I want to have a talk with you.
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Down in Gina’s lab, the Gold Digger had gotten the phone, and was holding a conversation… Albeit one that confused her.
Gina (Talks into phone): Penny… What do you mean you’re in Missouri!?
Penny (Voice): Yes. Just as I said. I found out I’m in Missouri.
Gina (Talks into phone): How the heck did you end up there!? We were in Japan!
Penny (Voice): Hey, it wasn’t like we were in Japan just yesterday, (though it feels like it) we were there a week ago. That’s plenty of time for me to get my butt back to the states.
Gina (Talks into phone): True, true… Still…
Penny (Voice): Hmm… Hey, Gina. I’ll try to get back as soon as I can.
Gina (Talks into phone): Okay. We really do need to talk. I don’t remember much about what happened.
Penny (Voice): Me neither. Hopefully, this guy will be able to help us.
Gina (Talks into phone): Guy? What do you mean?
Penny (Voice): Yeah. I woke up in a hotel room with some Japanese guy. He seems… ‘Okay’, at the moment, he’s like me. Very confused.
Gina (Talks into phone): Funny you should mention that. We woke up here with a Japanese guy too.
Penny (Voice): Really?
Gina (Talks into phone): Yeah. We also got married to him.
Penny (Voice): WHAT!?
Gina (Talks into phone): Yep. Apparently while we were under the effects of whatever happened, my sisters and I married this guy.
Penny (Voice): YOU’RE MARRIED! … AND TO THE SAME GUY AS YOUR SISTERS!?!?!?
Gina (Talks into phone): Yes, actually.
Penny (Voice): Damn… That’s really, really…
Gina couldn’t help but begin smirking.
Gina (Talks into phone): And it gets better. It’s quite ironic actually.
Penny (Voice): How so?
Gina (Talks into phone): You know the concept of arranged marriages, right?
Penny (Voice): Yes. So?
Gina (Talks into phone): It seems that a few months before I was born, my father had spent a month in Japan, training under an evil little troll with two other guys.
Penny (Voice): Okay… So?
Gina (Talks into phone): Well, it turns out, dad made a contract for an arranged marriage with the guy. So basically, if that man had a son, one of us would have had to marry him.
Penny (Voice): Are you joking!?
Gina (Talks into phone): Nope. And get this, Penny. It turns out the guy we slept with and got married to IS the son of that man.
Penny (Voice): WHAAAAAAAAAAT!?
Gina (Talks into phone): Yes. We just fulfilled that old contract without even realizing it.
Penny (Voice): No way…
Gina (Talks into phone): Yes way, Penny. On the bright side, Ranma really is a nice guy. VERY good in the sack.
Penny (Voice): … Are you kidding me?
Gina (Talks into phone): Nope. I mean, hell, if he can satisfy my sisters and I and STILL be okay, he has got to be some kind of wonder.
Penny (Voice): Or have enough stamina and endurance to rival a small army.
Gina (Talks into phone): Or at least five giants.
Penny (Voice): True.
Gina (Talks into phone): Anyway, I better get going now.
Penny (Voice): Oh?
Gina (Talks into phone): Yes, I have to make preparations and continue some searching. Like finding out how he legally married all three of us!
Penny (Voice): Okay. That makes sense. Polygamy isn’t exactly legal in the U.S.
Gina (Talks into phone): Tell me about it. Well, you take care, all right, Penny.
Penny (Voice): Yeah. I’ll be getting on a bus tomorrow. I’ll probably see you sometime within three days. Oh, and Gina.
Gina (Talks into phone): Yeah, Penny?
Penny (Voice): Try checking in on Charlotte. Lord knows how the poor girl, (or worse, how my house) is doing. She’s been alone all week.
Gina (Talks into phone): Understood. I’ll take the time to check on Charlotte later.
Penny (Voice): Thank you.
Gina (Talks into phone): All right. See you then, Penny.
Penny (Voice): Later, Gina.
Hearing Penny hand up the phone on her end, Gina put her phone back on the hook. She let out a sigh as she looked around at her equipment, her computers. This stuff was her world. It was here joy. But now…
Gina: ARGH! I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT RANMA!!!
Yes, Gina was feeling slightly jealous. Talking about Ranma to Penny had gotten her blood boiling, and the flame needed quenching again. True, that Gina knew she had a turn already today, but damn it, knowing her sister Britanny had gotten a turn, and now that Brianna was going at it with him made Gina start to yearn for some more ‘horse steak’.
So, deciding that her search could wait, Gina left her desk and decided to go upstairs.
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In the Omega level of Gina’s lab is where Britanny got to keep most of her workout equipment. Literally, Lab 1 on the Omega Level of Gina’s Lab Complex had been completely converted into a gym, (with a working sauna in the back). Currently, Britanny was on the hydraulic press, lifting a good ten tons of weight, (her maximum weight endurance being fifteen tons).
Britanny (Lifting weights): 234... 235… Nnn… 236...
This time, however, Britanny found herself having difficulty concentrating on her workout regime. As soon as she got deeply into it, she found her thoughts wandering to memories of her time with Ranma earlier that day…
Britanny (Lifting weights): 237...
The way he would caress her fur, actually enjoying it. Lord knows the boy hasn’t gotten the chance or nerve to pet a cat in years, and being able to stroke Britanny’s pelt must have been pleasurable. Britanny knew she took great care of her fur.
Britanny (Lifting weights): Must have felt like silk to him… 240...
Britanny smiled as she remembered Ranma’s ministrations of her body. Damn, did that boy know how to use her hands. The way he caressed the shorter, sensitive fur on her breasts, hell the way Ranma caressed them, they were practically huge erogenous zones.
Britanny (Lifting weights): 243... 244... Oh, damn it’s hot…
Sweating slightly, Britanny could feel her body temperature going up. And she knew it wasn’t because her workout was pushing her body to the limits. She knew it was because of what she was thinking about…
Britanny (Lifting weights): 246... 247... Mmm… Buns of steel…
Britanny giggled girlishly as she thought of Ranma. He may have been lean, but he was still muscular. He was fit, and had the body most male Olympic gymnasts would kill for. And he was definitely limber. Some of the positions they did, he had to be either very, VERY limber, or double-jointed.
Britanny (Lifting weights): 250... Drool… 251...
Finding herself blushing, Britanny knew what she wanted. She wanted some Ranma. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, or midnight snack, she didn’t care when. There was something about that man. Something about her ‘husband’. She still felt slightly guilty over betraying Stripe, but she didn’t feel as bad as she did this morning. She had also taken off the engagement ring from her other hand. She planned to give the ring back to Stripe. It wouldn’t feel right to her if she just kept it.
And still, she had Ranma. He was wild stallion that could roam her pastures. And Britanny would let him any time he pleased.
Britanny (Lifting weights): 255... 256…
*SNAP*!
Britanny blinked and watched as the bar she was holding onto on the hydraulic press literally broke apart. As she went deeper into thought, thinking about Ranma she gripped the bar harder and harder until she broke it.
Britanny: Aw, damn it… That’s the SECOND hydraulic press I broke. Now what am I going to do for a workout?
Looking around the gym for anything of even a remote challenge, Britanny let out a defeated sigh.
Britanny: Looks like it’s back to lifting pick-up trucks again until Gina can fix that bar.
And that is what Britanny would have done, had Britanny not picked up a scent. Her nose twitched for a few moments as she tried to identify it. Then she blushed as she came to the realization of what it was. It was herself. She could feel she was getting highly aroused.
Britanny (Blushes, Thinks): Aw, damn it! When did I start giving off such pheromones? I smell like a cat in Heat! This is so embarrassing…
However, Britanny’s embarrassment soon turned into a playful smile as she came to a realization.
Britanny (Thinks): Hey! Ranma is pretty good. He’d make a good workout. Hell, Britanny has sex to stay in shape, and so can I! Hell, he is my husband after all, so there’s nothing wrong. I just hope Bri doesn’t mind sharing…
Without another word, Britanny left the room as quick as lighting, and began running upstairs. She planned to continue her exercises in a whole new fashion.
(------)
Ranma let out a light groan as he lay in bed besides Brianna. Boy, that girl could keep going for quite a bit. Ranma didn’t think he would have been able to last that. Still, it was a very enjoyable experience, and Ranma was being given time to rest.
Of course, while Ranma thought they were done, Brianna was just letting Ranma rest up for ‘Round 2’. Brianna wanted to make sure Ranma would last. After all, they were only into hour one of Bri’s infamous ‘eight hour workouts’. Bri wanted to make the most of her and Ranma’s time together.
Ranma (Breathes heavily): Bri?
Brianna (Smiles): Yes, Ranma?
Ranma: That… HUFF… That was incredible.
Brianna (Smirks proudly): Why, thank you, Ranma. You’re pretty great yourself.
Ranma: You mean that?
Brianna: Yeah. Usually after the first hour, I’d need to take another hour break so Genn could gain his bearing and strength back. You on the other hand aren’t that affected. Very cool in my opinion.
Ranma winces slightly, but still manages to smile.
Ranma: Let me guess… This is one of those ‘eight hour workouts’?
Brianna nodded her head energetically and smiled broadly. Ranma shook his head slightly and let out a good-natured sigh.
Ranma: Figures…
Still smiling, Brianna leaned forward and kissed Ranma on the lips. Ranma found himself kissing Brianna back, wrapping his arms around her as he did. He really liked the gun-nut Lycanthropoid. She was honest with herself for the most part, but seemed to keep a lot of her true feelings and emotions inside. Ranma knew what that was all about, as he had to hide a lot of his feelings behind an act of bravado and machoism. But with these girls, his wives, he could let the act drop for the most part.
It was then that there was a knocking on the door?
Ranma: Who is it?
Gina (Voice): It’s me!
Brianna (Calls out): What do you want, Gina? It’s my turn you know!
Gina (Voice): But you practically take forever!
Brianna: HEY! It’s not my fault you don’t know how to budget your time for nookie!
Ranma sweat-dropped as he heard that. He didn’t want this conversation to go further, (as it made him feel like a piece of meat).
Ranma: Aw, Bri, can’t you just let her in? I mean, we spent some time together.
Brianna (Rolls her eyes): Fine…
Britanny (Voice): RANMA!!!
It is then that Brianna’s door literally slams open and a blur of slightly orange-tinted gold and white blurs across the room.
Ranma literally lets out a breath as Britanny is on top of him. He’d never experienced a flying tackle before. It gave Ranma an idea of how strong Britanny was.
Brianna: Damn it! This was my turn!
Britanny: So? You got an hour alone with him. That’s more than Gina and I got earlier.
Gina steps into the room, slightly glaring at Brit
Gina: I said the same thing. Hey, Cheetah, I thought you were downstairs working out.
Britanny: I was. Then the exercise machine crapped out on me.
Gina: Damn it, Brit. You break almost everything you touch.
Britanny: Not everything.
Britanny then starts hugging Ranma, purring as she does so. Ranma begins to blush as Britanny’s purring is practically vibrating his whole body.
Ranma: Um, Britanny… Do you mind?
Britanny (Blushes): Sorry, was I doing anything wrong?
Gina & Brianna: YES!
Britanny (Whimpers slightly): Sorry…
Ranma sighs as he sees Britanny start to feel bad. She really didn’t do anything that wrong in his opinion.
Ranma (Hugs Britanny): It’s okay, Britchan.
Britanny’s eyes widened in surprise.
Britanny: You called me Britchan?
Ranma (Blushes): Er, yeah.
Surprising Ranma, Britanny hugged Ranma tightly. So tightly there was a slight, *SNAP*!
Britanny: OH MY GOD! I AM SO SORRY, RANMA!
Ranma: … It’s okay… Ow… I think you broke a rib…
Gina & Brianna: DAMN IT, CHEETAH!
Britanny (Ears flatten back): Sorry…
Ranma groaned. Sure, these women weren’t out to hurt him or make his life miserable, but they were still hazardous to his health.
Ranma (Thinks): Maybe staying in Nerima wouldn’t have been so bad… Ow…
(------)
Within the bus station, Penny stood in line waiting impatiently to purchase her tickets. She worse a small white shirt and a small jean skirt. She had no bra. Why? Because Ryoga had ripped off of her last night as well as her other clothes. Ryoga was then forced to steal clothes from female college co-eds vacation in the same hotel next door.
Ryoga snorted sleepily. He, himself, had a change of clothes. He was wearing a red shirt with blue jeans and white and red Nike-brand sneakers. The Nubian woman had awakened him to catch the bus early in the money after calling someone name Gina long distance on his Sprint Card the night before. She said it was the least he could for de-virginizing her.
Ryoga frowned at the thought of his bill. He was no genius in math, but he knew that one hour call would cost him around three high digits.
Penny place hand in front of mouth and cocked her head towards the right at Ryoga who was half-sleep. She glared at him.
Penny (Thinks): Of all the men you could have had your first time with, you picked the village idiot from Tokyo who can’t even find his way out of a paper bag.
She thought how about the minutes it took for him to find his way out of the hotel to the bus stop. No one could be that blockhead and blind to find their way out of room. Penny sighed to herself and shook her head in disgust.
Penny: Why did I even wake him up today?
A thought came to her as she smirked. She stared back to her left at the table with traveling guides on them.
Penny (Thinks): If he can get lost in a small room… I wonder?
Penny puts on her best cute smile, the smile she normally gives Ace when she screwed something up and leans over to Ryoga.
Penny: Oh, Ryoga, I was wondering if you could get a traveling guide there on the table.
Ryoga gave her puzzled look. Not long ago, she scold him for saying good morning to her and now she was asking him for a favor?
Ryoga (Thinks): Why can’t I ever meet a normal woman?
Clearing his throat, Ryoga then spoke.
Ryoga: S, sure. Where is it?
Penny points towards the table.
Penny: Right over there. I’ll be waiting here for you.
With a nod of his head, Ryoga stepped out of line and headed for towards the table. As soon as he out of sight Penny looked towards the table. The bandanna boy was no where in sight. Penny smiled to herself.
Penny (Thinks): And the table was only five feet away from us…
(------)
An hour passed, and Penny was near the front of a line. There were only two other people before her. A grin was still smeared across her face.
Penny (Thinks): He’s probably half way to China right now. Though, I think I was a bit wrong in doing that… Nah…
The leading person stepped out of line after purchasing his ticket and the second person stepped up. Penny and the rest of the line follow.
Penny (Thinks): Well, it wasn’t his fault he ended up in this mess. He also was kind enough to let me use his Sprint Card for an hour. And he went out and stole some clothes for me… Girl, you’re starting to trip over a guy you just met. You have a man at home… I wonder if Ryoga has a home… If he does, he probably can’t find it.
Penny puts a hand under chin as she begins go into deeper thought.
Penny (Thinks): And if he can’t find his home, how often does see his family? Oh my God! I tricked a handicapped boy into getting lost! I have to find him before something bad happens.
Finally, the last person steps way from the counter. Penny strides to the counter, glancing at the clerk with a hesitant expression.
Clerk: Hello, Miss. Will you be buying a ticket?
Penny: Um…
(------)
Penny had been searching the bus station for the past twenty minutes now. And there was still no sign of Ryoga. It would seem that the forever lost boy had adventured out into the unknown. Penny frowned as she stared out the glass windows of the building, pondering over Ryoga’s disappearance.
Penny: That idiot… That dummy… He’s…
It was then that an elder Latin woman came out of the women’s bathroom with haste. She ran towards Penny.
Elder Latin woman: Excuse me. Do you know a Ryoga Hibiki?
Penny: Y, yes ma’am.
Elder Latin woman: I believe he’s waiting for you inside the women’s room. He told me he couldn’t find his way out and asked you to come help him.
Penny (Sighs): Thank you.
Elder Latin woman: Don’t mention it. May I asked, is your friend handicapped?
The young Nubian girl giggled at the remark.
Penny: Yes, unfortunately.
Penny waved as the elder woman paced slowly towards the bus. Penny walked to the door of the restroom. There was a small window. Peeping inside, she spotted the bandanna boy staring down into the sink. She giggled to herself again and proceeded through the door.
Penny: Ryoga, what are you doing?
Ryoga: I was looking for you to give you this travel guide.
Penny: Ryoga… Thank you.
She wrapped her hand around Ryoga’s hand and led to him towards the door. Ryoga eyes searched her features she did. He didn’t know what was wrong with him, but his attraction to her was becoming stronger. Penny froze in her tracks in front of the door. She could feel an incredible building behind her. She turned to find Ryoga glowing a tad bit red, giving her a wicked smirk.
Penny: R, Ryo-
Penny was cut off by a passionate kiss. Her eyes widened at the sudden rush of pleasurable feeling building her body. “Mmmm…” was the sound that escaped her during their lip lock. Her knees buckled, her nipples hardened slightly exposing them underneath the fabric of her cotton shirt. All of her strength left her arms and legs, causing her to fall forwards, his lips touched hers. Her panties were becoming soaked.
Ryoga broke the kiss, and began kissing down Penny’s neck, along her shirt and exposing her stomach. He lifted her up and began to kiss her thighs. Penny began breathing heavily. She turned her head towards the window, looking for anyone to come in the restroom to stop this madness.
Penny: Ryoga, you have to stop.
Ryoga kisses began to get warmer…
Penny: What if someone catches us?
And warmer…
Penny: This bathroom maybe soundproof, but people maybe notice.
Ryoga’s kiss were “hot”
Penny: Ooooooooh… There… There…
Penny’s body shuddered at the warm and moist pleasure feeling that began to course through her body. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head. Her shoulders clenched to her neck and she balled her hand into fits, holding them near her bosom.
Penny: Oh God, that’s the spot, Ryoga!
Outside of the bathroom, one could see Penny head sink below the window. Her arm, which had been balancing herself was the last to be seen before a shriek erupted through the vents. Though the bathroom was soundproof… The air vents weren’t. Everyone in the bus station stop in their activities as they caught the sounds of a young, independent Nubian woman singing an orgasmic tone.
(------)
Penny glared at herself in the window of the bus. She hadn’t been humiliated like that in all of her life. It was worse than that time at Sally Doogal’s sleepover where Gina and herself started the ’Wedgie War’. Sighing, Penny knew she was right, as the bathroom had been soundproof… But not vents. She and Ryoga had walked out of the bathroom, after his ‘buffet’ to find many people staring at her. It wasn’t later until she found out from the female bagging clerk, that they she had a, “wonderful singing voice” and proceed to annoyingly cheer her on for getting her ‘groove’ on with ‘fine’ guy.
Both she and the lost boy sat apart with a huge, obese Caucasian man sitting between them. Penny pierced a glare at Ryoga who oddly shivered at her glance, despite not even noticing her. Ryoga wasn’t that fine. Ace was better. Well, Ace doesn’t have a build like Ryoga nor did he have any fangs…
Penny felt a cold shiver go down her spine as she caught herself having another naughty thought. She gave Ryoga a hard stare. Her eyes suddenly widened, noticing a substance gleaming on his chin. She quickly dug into the pocket of her skirt and pulled out a napkin and began to wipe the ‘juices’ off his mouth.
Ryoga (Surprised): W, what are you doing?
Penny: Hold still so I can clean you off. You know you forget to clean yourself off after you left the bathroom. Are you trying to embarrass me!?
Ryoga: S, sorry?
Penny sighed. She didn’t understand what made her go back for him. Sudden two tiny figures of Penny appeared at either side of her head on her shoulders. One appeared to be a version of Penny dress in a tight, sexy red leather leotard, a pitchfork in her hands, horns on her head, and a pointy tail. The other Penny was an angelic version wearing a white dress, a harp in her hands, bird-like wings, and a halo floating above her head.
Devilish Penny: Penny, what is wrong with you!? You just went and dug this moronic lost loser back up! Why!?
Angelic Penny: Wait a minute, Penny. You shouldn’t be so hard on him. He has been rather nice to you. And he has a great body and is very good in bed; he knows how to please a woman. It’s true that he may not be one of the brightest apples on the tree, but he does have his good qualities.
Devilish Penny (Rolls her eyes): Oh please… (Narrows eyes). Hmmm… You know something, you’re right!
Angelic Penny (Blinks): I am?
Devilish Penny: Yes! He does have quality. And what Ace doesn’t know, can’t hurt him… I mean Ace would walk out on poor, old Penny if she told the truth.
Angelic Penny: I’m sure he’ll understand, if she came forward.
Devilish Penny: Yeah, I’m sure he’ll understand all the ‘details.’ Besides, is it wrong Penny for exploit her own needs? I’m looking out for Penny’s interest here. I mean, we don’t want to put ourselves on the same level as Gina now do we; going after guys and having on-again, off-again relationships? So, as long as no one else knows about Penny getting married to some guy, which she happens to also get a divorce for, everything is Peachy-Keen.
Angelic Penny (Hesitant): I guess you’re right… Penny does have the right to do what she pleases…
Devilish Penny (Smirks): Aren’t I always?
Both figures disappear into thin air. Out of nowhere, a teddy bear lands in Penny’s lap. Suddenly, a young brown haired Caucasian boy pops head up smiling at her.
Boy: Miss, can I have my teddy back, please?
Penny smiles while handing him his bear back.
Boy: Thank you! (Blinks). Say, you’re that lady who was making funny bird sounds in the bathroom.
Penny’s eyes twitched and she grimaced. It was then that the boy’s mother, a Caucasian woman with long brown hair scolded her son, forcing him back onto the seat.
Boy’s mother: Now Daniel, what did I say about being rude?
Boy: Sorry mother.
Boy’s mother: Good. Besides, she sounded more like a monkey.
Penny gave the woman a surprised and annoyed look. As if to make matter worse, the woman’s husband spoke up.
Husband: I disagree. I thought she sounded like a cat meowing.
And then another neighboring passenger spoke up.
Male Passenger: I thought she sounded like a baboon myself.
The Nubian woman gritted her teeth angrily as more people spoke up.
Male Passenger: I thought she had a wonderful voice. More like a nightingale.
Female Passenger: Sounded more like a operas singer to me. Say, lady, do you do Broadway?
And soon the bus was active with people reminiscing, giving their opinion on Penny’s ‘singing’ talents. Penny began to panicky. She could not ride forty eight hours listening to people. She looked over to Ryoga.
Penny: Ryoga.
Ryoga: Yes?
Penny: May I use your bandanna.
Ryoga: S, sure.
Reaching to his forehead, Ryoga took off one of his infinite bandannas from his head. Even though Penny remembered seeing him put only one on. She couldn’t understand how he got so many.
Ryoga: And Penny, I thought you have the sweet sing voice I’ve ever heard.
Penny left eye twitched erratically as she glared murderously at the Eternal Lost Boy.
Penny (Sarcastic): Why thank you, Ryoga…
Ryoga smiled heartily.
Ryoga: Don’t mention it.
Penny tore off two ends of cotton from the sweater she was wearing and stuffed them in both of her ears and then to wrapped Ryoga’s bandanna around her eyes and ears. She laid her head against the window, folded her arm and let out a heavy sigh.
Penny (Thinks): This is gonna be a loooooooong trip.
(------)
End Chapter 3
Next Time: After being introduced to a Rejuvenation Tank, Ranma is feeling better than ever! And remembering Penny’s request, Ranma and the Diggers sisters are off to see Charlotte! How has the harpy been holding up for the past week by herself?
Author's Notes: I would once again like to thank Arhicks for all his input. He gave me the idea and bit of writing to work with for this Penny and Ryoga joke. Damn, that was great.
-This is RedPriest17, signing off.
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