+-----------------------+ |parahawk@white-star.com| |May 7, 1998 | +-----------------------+ Praying Mantis: Hey...hey, guys! I think we're onstage! Greymount: [struts] So we are. Remind me again, why exactly are we publishing this piece of rotting cow dung? Hawkstone: Don't ask me, I'm just the editor. [attempts, unsuccessfully, to hide himself] And the reports will show that I acted only under extreme pressure from my comrades! Damned peer pressure... Tarot: [in an official-sounding voice] This has been written as a parody of any disgusting lemon fanfiction circulating about. Any references that you notice are probably intentional, but if you get extremely offended, remember that this whole harebrained idea was WindStormX's, not mine. Kill him, not me. ^_- Standard disclaimers apply. WindStormX: [dramatically] Drumroll, please... +-----------------------------------+ | o DARK FORTRESS PRODUCTIONS o | | presents... | | | | _The Bitter Lemon_ | | a Ranma 1/2 WEIRDlemonfic | | | | co-authored by WindStormX, | | Praying Mantis, Tarot, and | | Greymount Sword | | o (edited by Paradin Hawkstone) o | +-----------------------------------+ Kasumi awoke late that day. With a slight yawn, she prepared herself for another boring, normal day at the Tendo Dojo, stretching herself out and trying to convince her dumb mind that it was okay to get out of bed. Dumb. She wasn't dumb, she realized, she was smart. Very smart. What was wrong with her today? Then she realized something else, feeling down into her panties. She was growing something. A new body part. A penis. And she was getting hard. "O, dear," she sighed with a strangely seductive smile. "A penis. I've always wanted one of those." She rolled out of bed, filled with an innocent, stupid glee, added to by her erection and her strangely lowered IQ. She looked at herself in the mirror, and admired her bulging, excited breasts and curved legs. Laughing idiotically, she grabbed a pair of skin toned silk stockings and pulled them on, rubbing her tits for good measure. She looked down at her feet and put some three inch, open heeled supersexy shoes on, shuffling her toes around. A good start of a day, her numbed and stupidified mind told her. O_o Akane was in her room getting dressed, and looked at herself in her full length mirror, naked except for her panties and bra. Oddly, looking at herself, her pussy started dripping wet. Like, omigawd, she thought, smiling to herself. I'm a lesbian! She giggled stupidly, feeling herself get moister and moister until her panties were completely soaked through. I'm so insanely lesbian! She thought with a none too bright giggle, putting a short skirt on and discarding the bra. Apparently her intelligence level went down when she got horny. My name's Akane! Omigawd! I'm so incredibly Akane Tendo! Like, duh! I have no brain! She giggled stupidly again, feeling very smart with her previous thoughts. She licked her lips. I want a huge dick stuck in me, she thought with a slight giggle. A knock on the door. "Come in!" She sang, hoping it was someone that she could have sex with. It was Kasumi, dressed in panties, no bra, pantyhose, and tall sexy heels that showed off the curve of her legs and her pleasant feet. Akane noticed that there was a bulge in Kasumi's panties, and felt extremely smart for having done so. She giggled moronically, lying down onto the bed seductively. Kasumi lost no time. Her newfound part was getting so large and huge that it reached down to her knees now, and she giggled unintelligently and jumped on Akane's giggling form. Akane shrieked with insane pleasure as Kasumi's dick rammed into her soaked pussy, ripping through her skimpy panties and she flew back into a wall, still giggling with mad pleasure. Kasumi sat there on the bed, unable to move more than an inch now that her erection was reaching her toes, with painted red toenails under the hose. "Akane!" she shrieked happily, unaware that anything was wrong. The larger her dick got, the lower her intelligence got. "Fuck me! Fuck me! Fuck me! Fuck me!" She started rubbing herself, stimulating herself even further, all the while screaming inanely in her crazy pleasure. Akane's intelligence, having had Kasumi's dong stuck in her, was rapid plumetting from its usual moronic self, making her so dumb she was losing all sane thought as she pounced on a rounded bedpost and shrieked as it rammed up into her, almost reaching her stomach. "I'm a slut!" She screamed happily. "I'm a complete whore!" She pushed so hard that her dripping pussy got away from the bedpost and she managed to stand up on the ground, spinning so that he short skirt twirled and her butt showed. "Fuck me, Kasumi." Kasumi found herself unable to move and shrieked with insane joy, rubbing herself so hard that her penis was now almost twice as tall as she was. Akane lost no time in leaping up onto the bed and giggling as she stroked it and shoved it into her mouth, groaning and shrieking her pleasure to the world. She sucked away happily, giggling stupidly and kicking it with her feet which wanted to fuck something all of their own. Kasumi moved herself just enough so that the dick removeed itself from Akane's mouth and dragged down her into her insanely wet and dripping pussy. Akane screamed as she entered, grabbing the dick and shoving it in further. "Ah!" She shrieked moronically. "More! More!" She used her sexy legs to stroke Kasumi's dick now, and all in one second, it exploded into her, drenching her poot and her upper things and her stomach in sticky cum. Akane smiled dumbly and licked it up, barely even noticing that as Kasumi blew her load, her penis disappeared and Akane began to grow one, much to both their glee. Just as Akane's new body part's erection reached her heels, Kasumi was on top of it and shrieking her lungs out, laughing in idiotic glee. Apparently the intelligence didn't return afterwards. O_o Nabiki glared upstairs at the screaming and shrieking going on. She put down her newspaper and stalked up there, prepared to demand an explanation. O_o "C'mon, Ranma, just try little. For Shampoo sake." Ranma-chan shook her head. "I don't drink, Shampoo, sorry." Shampoo crawled up on Ranma-chan seductively, her soft, wet brests rubbing against Ranma-chan's pussy on the way up. "Please, Ranma darling? It make you much happy." She smiled, pouring Ranma-chan a small glass of Vodka. Ranma-chan was starting to get wet. She nodded a little unwillingly, taking the glass and draining it. She coughed. "No more." He vision was blurred. Shampoo smiled maliciously, taking the whole bottle and shoving it into an unwilling Ranma-chan's mouth! "Now Ranma try drink, yes?" She smiled. Ranma-chan tried to resist at first, but the alchohol combined with some sort of aphrodisiac was taking its toll on her. Her vision blurred more, and her mind became numbed. She smiled dumbly as Shampoo stuck a dildo in her and becan fucking her with it. She began shrieking with pleasure, and willingly took more gulps and laughed gleefully when Shampoo stuck more dildos in her hands and mouth, and told her to suck and rub. Then she noticed she was chained to a wall by Shampoo. Shampoo crawled up her again, and something else stuck into her. It was Shampoo's dick that she had suddenly grown. She screamed with insane joy and unlimited pleasure, even as she knew that Kodachi had strapped a dildo and was sticking it into her mouth, she pushed it away for a moment, downing more of the drugged Vodka, and began sucking again. Ranma-chan shrieked with insane pleasure at having so many dicks shoved into her at once, screaming for joy. Shampoo giggled to herself and decided to drink some Vodka. She didn't know if the effects were permanent or not, but I could sure use some excitement here, she thought. She poured into into a shot glass and took a small sip. Her breasts bulged and grew, and her eyes grew larger, and she licked her lips, feeling the pangs of stimulation on her. She downed the rest of the glass, and her breasts bulged even more, and her IQ decreased notably with each drink. She giggled happily, picking up the whole bottle and gulping and slurping noisily, watching her breasts grow with a dumb smile, jiggling them around gleefully. Then she noticed Ukyou watching from a corner, sobbing. "Why?" Ukyou wailed, feeling herself. "Why can't any of you fuck me?" "You're ugly," was Shampoo's unthinkingly dimwitted response. "Put on something cute." Ukyou smiled hopefully, ran out, and came back dressed in purple silken hose, no shoes, a hopeful look on her face, and a lot of makeup. Her skirt was very short, and her breasts were inside a scimpy bra. Shampoo ran up to Ukyou gleefully and licked her pussy, which wasn't as wet as she expected. She handed Ukyou the Vodka, which she quickly drank. Ukyou knew she was making a mistake, but her lonliness and her desire for lust were getting the best of her as she gulped down the drugged Vodka. She realized the extent of her error too late, and all sane thoughts were shoved out of her head, replaced by ones of mad lust and getting her now dripping pussy rammed by the biggest thing possible. She giggled in her purple hosiery and jumped onto Shampoo, who, she noticed, had a penis. Not a dildo strap, a real penis. She giggled again and rammed it into her, and they both giggled moronically and started feeling each other passionately. Meanwhile, Kodachi was forcing Ranma-chan to deep throat her, and she WAS using a dildo. Realizing that it wasn't satisfying her, she snatched the Vodka up and drank from it, getting dizzy and horny at the same time, driving her lust through the roof. She barely noticed that the dildo had been replaced with a real cock, which was getting longer and longer, and more and more erect by the moment, even as it reached down past her knees, jutting out the side of her leotard. Ranma-chan touched it curiously, giggling insanely, now that the cursed Vodka had purged all her brains from her head, she didn't even nkow what it was, rubbing her hands up and down it. Kodachi shrieked with pleasure, and arched her back, before realizing in her dimmed wits that Ranma-chan had stopped feeling her. "No, Ranma," she shrieked, losing herself to the pleasure of rubbing herself and toppling under the weight of the long, fat penis that dragged along next to her heels, sticking out the back of her gymnastics shoes. "Fuck me. Please," she begged. "Please, Ranma. Fuck me. Sit on me!" She fell into helpless babbling, as Ranma-chan stupidly touched the huge cock again, finally realizing that it would be good to suck on. Seemingly, Ranma-chan rememberd two words. "Like, omigawd," she exclaimed boppishly. "Like omigawd, like like like." She giggled idiotically, grabbing the cock and shoving it into her mouth, blow and sucking for all she was worth, giggling insanely all the while. O_o Nabiki giggled in her butt-tight nylons. "Like, duh. Lay me," she ordered, with a bitchy expression and a boppish wave of her hand. Kasumi and Akane were more than happy to obey, running up to her and sucking for all they were worth, even as Nabiki realized with an odd feeling that her intelligence was being sucked away, even as was her newfound penis. Soon, all that was left of the once ingenious money-maker was a horny little slut that wanted more sex - and that was all she wanted, wearing her butt-tight clothing and raping her sisters, and getting raped by her sisters. -_- WindStormX: Sex... [drool] Praying Mantis: Quit fantasizing, you sick little... Tarot: Well, to whoever's reading - don't say I didn't warn you. Did you catch the references? ^_^ Greymount: I cannot believe we just published that. I can't believe I helped _write_ that awful thing. -_- Hawkstone: Take heart! Ha ha. How bad could it be... O_O [Everyone pounds the hapless editor into the ground.]