Beware: this is a lime (lemon?) shortfic built around a *really* bad joke. You have been warned, that's all. ^_^ ---------------------------------------------------------------------- Ranma 1/2: "Ryouga Porks Akari", or "Oy, vine!" a shortfic by Shunsuke -||| ---------------------------------------------------------------------- "Oh, Ryouga," cried Akari as he kissed her neck with a passion she never thought she'd feel, "I want you..." Ryouga's strong arms both cradled and caressed her small frame as he carried her to the bedroom, gently holding her with one as the other brought pleasure to different parts of her body. He put her down on the bedside sitting up, and her robe slipping off her shoulders enough to expose her from her bosom down to her hips. She kissed his hand as he touched her jawline, then she moved it aside so she could focus on removing his pants; the belt, button and zipper came undone easily, leaving only the elastic-waist boxers which did not hide Ryouga's excitement very well. His shorts fell at last, leaving both of them in the same state of undress. "Ooooooh, Ryouga," she moaned as she looked at his exposed lower body, "I-I never thought it would look like _this_. I mean, I've seen magazines, read bishounen manga, but I never expected..." "Does it surprise you?" he grinned lustfully, lovingly stroking her hair. "Yes," she said as she took it in her hands to gently touch him, "Now I understand why you don't like pork." ---------------------------------------------------------------------- E N D ---------------------------------------------------------------------- For those of a Jewish descent, I'll say this first: neither the story nor the title were meant to be offensive to Jewish people, so if it does, please tell me and I'll apologize. It just seemed like a good idea at the time. Shunsuke