Once upon a time there were these four siblings, who
 happened to be martial artists, who also happened to be
 movie buffs...

 One was a rather skinny fellow, looking a lot like Hikaru
 Gosunkugi, the other a short-haired girl with a fair tan, the next a
 sloppily dressed lad with long hair and eyeglasses, and
 finally, a rather cute 12 year old with a hyperactivity
 problem....

 ROLL CALL!
 Ryo Muhoshin, snide yet debonaire
 Ryoko Muhoshin, a teen girl with flare
 Megs Muhoshin, a pervert beyond compare
 Kyoko Muhoshin, tiny tot without a care

Ryoko: so, what's up tonight?  And why's Megs drooling?
Megs:  Lara Bartram!
Ryoko:  Uh oh.
Megs:  She wrote a story!  About us!
Ryo:  (raising an eyebrow)  What?
Ryoko: (blushing slightly)  Us?!
Kyoko:  Wha's going on?

(moment of silence.)

Ryo:  BLINDFOLDS!  EARPLUGS!
Ryoko:  RIGHT!
Kyoko:  HEY!  NO!  NONONONO!

(sounds of brief struggle)

Kyoko:  NO FAIR!  NO FAIR!
Megs:  Right! ROLL FILM!  Get ta show me givin'the lovin
       to Sayuri AND Yuka!  At the same time!  WAHAHAHAA!

On Fri, 17 Oct 1997, Lara Bartram wrote:

> 
>  	"And what do I have here?" Ryoko said quietly, eyeing her
> prize.  "Exactly who I was looking for."

Ryoko: (eyes bulging)  ME?!?!? AAAACK!
Megs:  Hey, no fair!  I should be the star!
Ryo:  (grumbling) Idiots.

> 	Her eyes tracked the lanky young man as he walked dejectedly
> down the street.  He had his eyes focussed on a picture in his hand
> and wasn't really looking where he was going.  Ryoko did her best to
> follow him nonchalantly.  Oh yeah, this was just the opportunity she
> was waiting for.

Ryoko:  What?!?!  What was I waiting for?!? What the hell is
        this?!
Megs:   Ew, I don't wanna watch HER do thw wild thang.
Ryo:    You think I'm happy about this?
Kyoko:  CAN'T SEE!

> 	"Excuse me," she said cheerily.
> 	Her target stopped and turned.  "Yes?"
> 	"Um, could I talk to you in private?  I need you to do a favor
> for me."
> 	"Well, I don't think..."
> 	"Please?"  Ryoko's eyes got big and puppy-ish.
>  	He struggled, but was unable to fight off her cuteness.  "OK,"
> he said dejectedly.

Ryo:  'fight off her cuteness'?  Oh please...
Ryoko: What's THAT supposed to mean?!
Megs:  Means you've got the appeal of a nazi.
Ryo:   Those be your words, boy, not mine.
Ryoko: Oh please please please please please don't let her
       make me do something embarrasing!

> A FEW MINUTES LATER IN UCCHAN'S BATHROOM...

Ryoko:  WHAT?!?!

> 	Ryoko ran her fingers through her lover's hair before
> clutching it in ecstasy.  It was everything she had hoped for, and
> more.  She was extra pleased to discover the bathroom doors locked so
> they had guaranteed privacy for a little bit.

Ryoko:  (blushes deep red) EEEEEEK!
Megs:   (wincing) Helllllo, didn't wanna see THAT much of
        her.  S'cuse me while I turn around.
Ryo:    (avoiding looking at the screen by reading
         newspaper)  "Yen takes a fall for the third week
         in a row, and..."

> 	Actually, she was more amazed at her catch's stamina.  He was
> holding up rather well and looked like he could actually last long
> enough to bring her to orgasm.

Ryoko:  (blushing, somehow, even more deeply) Ohmygod,
        ohmygod, ohmygod-
Megs:   Will you STOP THAT!
Ryoko:  I'M GONNA KILL LARA BARTRAM!!!
Kyoko:  CAN'T SEE!  CAN'T SEE!
Ryo:    (still reading newspaper)  "And in other news,
        scientists have cloned a panda..."

> 5 MINUTES LATER...
> 
> 	"OH!  Oh..."  That was it.  

Ryoko:  (covering face with hands)  I am SO embarrassed!
Megs:   Is it over yet?
Kyoko:  CAN'T SEE!
Ryo:    (still reading newspaper) Weather, page three....


>       "Ohhh...  Ryooooo..."


(Megane turns around and stares at the screen.)

(Ryoko turns pale as ice.)

(One of Ryo's eyes widens as he looks up from the newspaper.)

(There is another Big Momoent of Silence.)

Ryo:  ... (scoots away from Ryoko, ever so subtly)
Megs: (stares at Ryo, then at Ryoko, then at Ryo, then at
      Ryoko)  And you call ME perverted?
Ryoko:  It... it.... itititwassupposed to be... um...
        RYOUGA!  Yeah! "Ryoooooo-GA!"  See?
Megs:  Sis, that ain't helping.

(Ryo scoots further away from Ryoko.)

> 	Ryoko's lover stopped and looked at her.  "Don't you
> remember?  My name's Hikaru..."

Ryoko:  I WOULDN'T TOUCH THAT FREAK WITH A TEN FOOT POLE!
Megs:   Well, that sounds like what he had inside you...
        (ducks a punch from Ryoko)  Whooop!  I'm outta here!
        (runrunruns away)
Ryo:    Right behind you!  (Ryo runs....)

> 	"Right...  I knew that...  That's what I said."

Ryoko:  "Ryooooo-GA!"  It is supposed to be "Ryooooo-GA!"
        AARGH!
Kyoko:  WAH!  CAN'T SEE!

> END

Ryoko:  LARA BARTRAM, I'M GONNA KILL YA!!!!


-end-