Ranma Nibun no Ichi MST2K
Disclaimer, I don’t own the legal rights to any Anime Series or the fan fics I am MSTing.
| Deep in Washu’s lab Washu and Q are talking. | |
| Q | So this is the new fic for them to watch? |
| Washu | Yup. Can you can deliver it? |
| Q | Ok :: and disappears in a flash of light :: |
| Q | Here’s today fic. Psionic Ranma Chapter 1 :: Q disappears in a flash of light :: |
| Ranma | He wrote another chapter… |
| Akane | Great… |
| Ryoga | So in this chapter Ryoga defeats Ranma and marries Akane. |
| Akane | What… Well with this author… |
| Kasumi | Oh my! |
| Ranma | How long are you going to sit there and play with your tire? |
| Genma | “Boh-haa” |
Psionic Ranma
In this chapter Ranma gets his training as a Psionic. I’m not going to go into detail what he’s taught and how, I’m going to use a flash forward because it would take too much time to write out 9 months worth of training. Chapter one begins the actual lemon chapters, unless stated otherwise all following chapters will be lemons. I may eventually write a non-lemon side story detailing his training, or if someone would like to let me know…
| Ranma | Not going to get into detail, because the author has not experience in martial arts and would sound like an idiot. |
| Ryoga | Obviously Ranma, just look at how he is writing all of our characters. |
| Nabiki | “Bum dum bub” |
| Kasumi | Lemon… should Akane be watching this? |
| Kasumi | He must be a pervert to write this. How sad he must not have a girlfriend. |
| Nabiki | Who would want to be his girlfriend? |
| Ukyo | If they knew him, they would run for the hills. In fact if the author where here, I would teach him a lesson. |
| Everyone | I would help… |
Chapter 1
Ranma looks up the tower to get an idea of how far he has to climb and where, if
anywhere, there is a place to rest. Seeing none he simply shrugs his shoulders
and starts climbing. He continues climbing for about eighteen hours, almost
slipping off several times, when he finally reaches Korin’s Lookout. He looks
around until he spots something that looks like a cat walking on its hind legs
and holding a walking stick.
| Genma | Ok, so Ranma climbed for 18 hours straight without eating, sleeping, or drinking. |
| Ranma | Does the author know anything about human beings? |
| Ryoga | So the man who guards Korins tower is where? |
| Ranma | And his tent, campfire, son, and provisions are? |
| Ukyo | Must not have been important enough to mention… |
| Xiam Pu | Must no understand Dragon Ball. |
| Goku | Who moved Korin’s Tower? |
| Ranma | Why are you here Goku? |
| Goku | I followed Ryoga. |
“Ok, it looks like a c_c_cat, but c_c_cats don’t walk on their hind legs and carry walking sticks. Hmm, must be a shape shifter…” Ranma mutters to himself.
| Ranma | Why aint I freaking out? |
| Akane | So in the 2 seconds Ranma slept he cured his Nekoken? |
| Everyone | Wow, that was so fast the author did not mention it. |
| Ryoga | Why didn’t Ranma do that do that earlier? |
| Ranma | I wish I could we are being sarcastic, pig boy. |
“Ah, Ranma, you’re here to get the sacred water huh?” Korin states.
| Goku | Would Korin train a developing Telephatic pervert with no Honor? |
| Ryoga | Hmmm, doubt it. |
| Nabiki | Plot Hole… |
“Yah, whoever you are, why don’t you save us both the trouble and give me the water so that I can get back to Nerima.” Ranma demands.
| Ranma | Gee, I couldn’t have asked nicely? |
| Goku | Why didn’t Korin throw him off the tower? |
| Akane | I guess the author thought a Master like Korin would train any moron and doesn’t care if he disrespects him. |
“Heh, it’s not that simple young one. Why don’t we go down and eat lunch and we can begin your training tomorrow?” replies Korin.
| Ranma | He’s going to train him? |
| Ukyo | Ranchan’s acting like a jerk and he wants to train him? |
| Goku | Korin is acting like Yoda, kind of. |
| Ranma | Maybe the author got the two mixed up. |
| Nabiki | Maybe, the question is, was it on purpose or on accident. |
“Fine, whatever, what is your name anyway?” Ranma asks.
| Ryoga | Ok he reads a scroll about an old martial artist master named Korin that is a cat and he doesn’t know who the cat is? |
| Ukyo | So I guess he read it, but did not understand it, but understood it enough to find the tower. |
| Nabiki | Is that Ryoga or Ranma? And if it is, its neither of them. If it was Ryoga he would end up in Kansas. |
| Ryoga | How’d you guess I ended up in Kansas one time? |
| Nabiki | … |
“Oh, I’m Korin, and if you’d pardon me for a few minutes I have something to take care of up here, so if you’d just head down those stairs behind me you’ll find my dining room already set up.” Korin says.
| Goku | Korin has a dining room? |
| Ryoga | Must be when he remodeled. Oh wait a minute, this is before you got there, so how could he have fixed damage you did to his tower before you where born? |
“Cool, when do we start training?” Ranma enquires.
| Ranma | He said tomorrow, duh! |
| Ukyo | Ranchan aint that thick headed. |
“I’ll explain everything when I get down there after we eat.” Korin replies
| Goku | That sounds more like Korin. |
Ranma just sighs to himself and heads down the stairs. Once he reaches the dinning room he sees nothing on the table except for a bowl full of beans. He walks over and picks up one bean to look at it. Deciding it should be fine to eat; he pops it in his mouth and grabs a handful that soon follow. Shortly after Korin walks down.
| Goku | That would kill anyone to eat a handful of Senzu Seeds. |
| Ranma | I had no idea seeds were beans. |
| Ryoga | When did he move his bowl from the pedicel to a table? |
| Goku | When did Korin get a table? |
| Goku | :: Scratches his head :: I’m confused. |
“Ranma, please have one bean. They are called Senzu beans and one is enough to feed a grown man for three days. They will also heal any injury short of being dead when eaten.” Korin states pleasantly.
| Goku | Again he ate two handfuls, I ate one bean and was full for three days. |
| Happosai | Is that Ranma or Genma? |
| Ranma | He should be dead. |
“Uhh… Korin, I just ate a handful, but your explanation explains why I actually feel full.” Ranma mutters while scratching the back of his head.
| Ukyo | Again, he should be dead. He had 2 handfuls, at least. So he ate at least 2 years of food in 1 second, and is alive? |
| Nabiki | Saotome, I knew you liked food, but that is ridiculous. |
| Ranma | That aint me, that is some freak of nature. |
“Oh, well in that case we will retire for the evening and your training will start tomorrow. This bottle on my walking staff,” Korin indicates the bottle that is at the top of his staff, “contains the Sacred Water you seek. All you have to do is get the bottle off my staff and the water is yours.” Korin states.
| Goku | Finally, that sounds like Korin. |
| Ryoga | Maybe the author is drunk. And during this scene got sobered up. |
“That’s all, man I’ll be back kicking the old perverts ass sooner than I thought.” Ranma grins.
| Ranma | I like kicking people’s asses? |
| Happosai | Ranma likes kicking my ass? |
| Soun | RANMA! There is no Ass kicking in my house. |
“We’ll see young one, we’ll see…” Korin chuckles evilly.
| Goku | :: Moans :: Korin got replaced, again. |
| Ryoga | So he hit the bottle again. |
| Nabiki | This is what happens when body snatchers take over. |
| Ukyo | Ok, so the author must be watching Ranma Nibun No Ichi on one TV and Star Wars on another TV while writing the Fan-Fic. That explains everything. That is why the author messed up on Korin, and might explain why he messed on everyone else. |
| Ranma | That explains it, that isn’t me, that is Darth Vader. |
| Ryoga | That must be in the hentai version of Star Wars. Leave it to a demented pervert to get a copy. |
| Happosai | I’ve seen that version, it wasn’t very good, not enough panty shots. |
With that Korin shows Ranma to the room he will be staying in then heads off. Ranma sits in his room thinking about the weird feelings he was getting from Korin. He could at times almost feel Korin’s humor, even though the Cat-Shape shifter didn’t seem to smile and kept seeing some short green guy with funny ears. He once again dismisses it as something to look at later and soon falls asleep.
| Goku | When did Korin get a bed room? He don’t have a room for himself. |
| Ryoga | Didn’t you sleep with Korin in the “Dining Room”? |
| Goku | Yeah the one big room, that was the only room in the whole tower. |
| Nabiki | So a developing telepath with no training is reading a experienced Telepath’s mind? |
| Ukyo | Once again, the sake is running out in America. |
The following morning Korin wakes Ranma up bright and early, intentionally moving his staff so that Ranma seems to have an easy victory at hand. Just as Ranma almost touches the bottle the staff swiftly moves out of his reach and Korin walks off. Ranma brashly chases after Korin trying to grab the bottle from the staff. Each time Korin lets Ranma almost touch it before moving it out of the way. This goes on for several hours when Korin decides it’s time for Ranma’s first trip down the tower. Korin slowly and expertly leads Ranma into a spiral. Once they finally hit the center Ranma finally realizes just what Korin did.
“Huryuu Shoten Ha!!!!” Korin yells.
| Goku | So Korin finally knocks the pervert off his tower. |
| Ryoga | So Ranma is lead into a spiral and does not realized until its too late, and does nothing to get out of the way. |
| Ranma | I guess the author doesn’t know me very well. |
| Everyone | :: Claps :: Yeah, its finally over. |
Ranma is propelled off the tower by the force of the Heavenly Dragon Blast and falls to the ground below. He remains lying there for a few minutes before shakily getting to his feet. He actually smirks as he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a Senzu bean which he quickly eats. He starts back up the tower. Two hours later he reaches Korin’s Lookout and glares at Korin.
| Everyone | What its not over? He should be dead, he fell a few miles straight down. |
“I can’t believe I actually fell for that one” Ranma states evenly.
| Ranma | Yeah, I can. |
| Ryoga | Maybe we should change his name. |
“Nice choice of words, ‘Wild Stallion’” Korin chuckles.
“Well, let’s resume” Ranma says.
| Ranma | Never mind that he got knocked off the tower, hit the ground, re-climbed it, without stopping, and seems unfazed. |
With that Ranma rushes forward and tries using the Katchuu Tenshin Amaguriken to get the bottle. Once he stops he notices writing on his hands. Upon looking closer he reads, “Too Slow, Slow Poke, A snail could do better” on his hands. He tries various tactics to try and get the bottle, including sneaking up on Korin, trying to hit his sleep Shiatsu, and cornering him. Finally Korin calls an end to the training. Both go down, eat a Senzu bean, and go to bed.
| Ryoga | Ranma then realizes he ate a few handfuls of Senzu yesterday, ate one 2 hours ago, and as he swallowed yet another seed, he explodes. |
| Goku | Korin looks at the pile of gooh all around him and laughs that he finally exploded. |
| Nabiki | He tried to corner him on a roof of building shaped like circle? |
| Ranma | Circles don’t have corners? |
| Everyone Else | * Dead Quiet * |
The following morning Korin again wakes Ranma up by hanging the bottle over his head. The day progresses the same as the first, only this time Korin dodges causing Ranma to fall from Korin’s Lookout. This time it only took Ranma an hour and forty-five minutes to get back up to Korin’s Lookout. Again Ranma tries the Katchuu Tenshin Amaguriken and again he fails to grab the bottle. Korin finally calls an end to the second day and they both go to bed after eating a Senzu bean.
| Goku | They eat another Senzu. |
| Ukyo | Boy the days seem to be getting shorter at Korin’s tower. |
| Ryoga | Must be Sake induced. |
The third day Korin is woken up by Ranma trying to grab the bottle when he’s asleep. Korin barely manages to move it out of his grasp. Korin takes off and Ranma follows right behind him. Ranma constantly tries to grab the bottle all day, each time getting just a little closer. Finally a few minutes before they usually stop for the day he grabs the bottle. He yanks the cork out and drinks the whole thing as fast as he can.
| Goku | Since when did Korin start slowing down that much? |
| Ryoga | So Ranma is as good as Goku when he went to train with Korin? |
| Genma | :: Holds up a sign saying “No way.”:: |
“Hey, this tastes like normal water.” Ranma says.
“That’s because it is, you didn’t think there was really a water that would quadruple your strength and speed, did you?” Korin replies
| Goku | The author finally gets something right. |
| Nabiki | Hooray. |
“Well, yeah, so now what, the water was a fake, I came all this way for nothing.” Ranma exclaims
| Ranma | I would never say anything like that. |
| Akane | We need to change the name so we don’t keep calling him Ranma. |
| Ukyo | That’s insulting to call that :: shake’s her head :: Ranchan. |
“Not true young one, you are in fact four times faster and stronger than when you arrived. Think, when you first climbed my tower it took you eighteen hours to get here, but yesterday it took you less than two hours.” Korin states with a smirk on his face.
| Goku | And Korin got replaced, again. |
| Nabiki | Damn Body Snatchers. |
“Wow, I guess you’re right. Well, time to head home to beat that demented pervert once and for all” Ranma says.
| Ranma | So the author thinks I am that dense? |
| Happosai | Ok, the author has turned Ranma into a bigger pervert than me, and he is going to kill me for being a pervert? |
| Nabiki | Maybe he thinks of you as competition. |
| Ryoga | Makes sense to me? |
“Not so fast Ranma, I noticed that you are psionic and I want you to go up to Kami’s lookout for training in how to use your new powers. He will also teach you some new martial arts tricks.” Korin replies.
| Ranma | Tricks? He is he going to teach him to pull a rabbit out of his hat? |
| Goku | Why would Korin send a pervert like that up to see Kami? |
| Soun | The pervert is going to be trained by Kami, and he is going to marry my Akane? |
“Ok, I guess. Hey! That explains why I’ve been sensing people’s emotions and stuff.” Ranma states.
| Nabiki | Boy, he is so smart. I wish I was that smart. :: chuckles :: |
“Yep, now, get off my lookout and go talk to Kami so I can get back to watching my Star Wars Marathon.” Korin says. (You guys thought he was thinking about Kami, think again…)
| Goku | So when did Korin get a TV? |
| Ryoga | Must be when the author blacked out after drinking a half a shot of Sake. |
| Happosai | That’s where my Special Star Wars tapes went. |
| Ukyo | This explains Korin’s weird behavior. |
Ranma starts to climb even higher and in about an hour and a half he finally reaches Kami’s Lookout.
“Umm… Kami, Korin sent me up here for some martial arts and psionic training.” Ranma states unsurely
| Ranma | Ok so he is rude to Korin, but is being respectful to Kami. |
| Goku | Ok, what happened to Mr. Popo? |
| Nabiki | I guess since Mr. Popo would throw this pervert off the tower because he is picky on who can see Kami… |
| Nodoka | Makes sense, so the author deleted Mr. Popo so Ranma could train. |
| Genma | :: Holds up a sign “Lets call this Ranma, Lemon Otaku”:: |
“I know, Ranma, please have a seat and start meditating.” Kami replies.
And so Ranma’s training in the psionic arts begins. Kami teaches him many things over the course of nine months; how to manipulate others thoughts, how to heal himself and others, how to use levitation, and how to make himself seem invisible. Of course Kami doesn’t just teach Ranma psionics, he teaches him some of Piccolo’s techniques. Halfway through the final month of training, after Ranma learned everything he could from Kami about being a Psionic, some unexpected trouble showed up during the night while Ranma was sleeping.
| Ranma | The real Ranma shows up and beats up Lemon Otaku. |
| Ryoga | From now on we are referring to the Pervert Ranma in the fic as Lemon Otaku. Since it is so bad. |
| Everyone | Agreed. |
| Kasumi | Ranma’s been their long enough to have a baby. |
| Nabiki | Huh? |
| Kasumi | He said he has been their “over the course of nine months” |
| Ryoga | Should I ask who the father was? |
| Ukyo | Well with this author, maybe Ranma screwed himself, in more than one way. |
“Green man tell LinLin and RanRan where husband at.” LinLin demands
| Ling-Ling | Pervert author no spell Ling-Ling name right. |
| Lung-Lung | Who RanRan? I name Lung-Lung. |
| Ranma | When did Lemon Otaku marry Xiam Pu’s sisters? |
| Nabiki | Plot Hole. |
| Ryoga | *Pulls out script* Hold on during the only episode Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung appear. They say the rule with future wives is, First Come First Serve. They where only joking with Ranma in the show when they said he is their husband. |
| Akane | I guess the author fell asleep during most of that episode and made up the rest. |
“No, please leave my lookout. You are not welcome here.” Kami replies.
| Ryoga | So they got past the Guard, Korin, and Mr. Popo. |
| Ukyo | Once again, certain characters disappear, as needed. |
| Goku | Uh, Kami would prefer Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung visiting his tower than Lemon Otaku. |
| Ranma | Damn Body Snatchers. |
“TELL WHERE HUSBAND IS OR LINLIN AND RANRAN ATTACK!!!” RanRan yells at Kami, having the side affect of waking Ranma.
| Ryoga | Of course we are assuming that “Husband” is Lemon Otaku. |
| Nabiki | True, another Plot Hole. |
| Goku | Of course we are assuming that Kami can not defend himself. |
| Ukyo | Well we are assuming he would throw two girls off the tower for waking him up. |
| Ling-Ling | Ranma not Husband, he older sister Xiam-Pu Husband |
| Lung-Lung | Who write this? |
Ranma stumbles out of his room in time to see LinLin and RanRan about to use their dragon attack on Kami.
| Nabiki | So the one person who could sleep through a nuke going off in the same room wakes up… |
| Akane | And once again, the God of the Earth cannot defend himself. |
| Ryoga | So they pull out their jukebox… |
“BOTH OF YOU STOP NOW!!!” Ranma yells. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?!?”
| Ranma | Isn’t it obvious, they are attacking Kami. |
| Xiam Pu | Why sisters attack stranger? |
| Ling-Ling | Why I attack Green Man? |
| Lung-Lung | Why we use Final Attack first? |
“Elders send LinLin and RanRan to get husband, now you come back with LinLin and RanRan. They sense airen’s ki as airen pass village. You be good airen and come with LinLin and RanRan, yes?” LinLin states absently.
| Ranma | Ok so now Lemon Otaku is airen? |
| Soun | Whats his name, first its Ranma, then Lemon Otaku, now its airen? |
| Nodoka | I thought we named our son Ranma. |
“No” Ranma replies evenly.
| Nodoka | My son’s… Hey wait a minute. |
LinLin and RanRan start towards Ranma with the intent of attacking him when they suddenly stop.
| Nabiki | So instead of trying to get Ranma to come with them willingly like they said, they choose to attack him. |
| Xiam Pu | Ranma Xiam Pu husband. Not Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung. |
| Nabiki | Another Plot hole, and he is Akane’s fiancée not Xiam Pu’s. |
“Since I can see there’s no way to convince you otherwise and you intend to attack me like you have before I’m forced to take more drastic measures.” With this said Ranma uses his psionic powers, changing LinLin and RanRan’s thoughts and feelings making them his slaves. For them Ranma is their master and to disobey him or even attack him means death.
| Ranma | Ok what did he do to “convince you otherwise”? |
| Nabiki | Ok so Lemon Otaku makes Xiam Pu’s little sisters his slaves because they start charging towards him. |
| Ryoga | Ok, so they yell at Kami, don’t touch him, don’t touch Lemon Otaku… |
| Ukyo | So Lemon Otaku then enslaves them… |
| Xiam Pu | Lemon Otaku no Man. |
“Sorry for the interruption Kami-Sensei.” Ranma says.
| Ling-Ling | Aiyaa! |
| Lung-Lung | Aiyaa! |
| Xiam-Pu | Aiyaa! |
“Not a problem Ranma, it's you who was woken up.” Kami replies.
| Goku | Nevermind the fact that you just enslaved two innocent girls right in front of Kami. |
| Nabiki | More body snatchers. |
| Ukyo | I thought this was supposed to be Ranma Nibun no Ichi. Not attack of the perverted Body Snatchers. |
| Akane | Maybe this is a cross over not listed by the author. |
“Well, I guess I should get back to bed.” Ranma states. “Heel” He orders his two new slaves.
| Ryoga | They are dogs now? Wait a minute when did Inu-Yasha show up? |
| Nabiki | And he turned into two girls. I had no idea that half demon could do that. |
LinLin and RanRan follow Ranma to his room and lay down on the floor next to his bed when he tells them to. The next half a month of training consists of Ranma practicing mental manipulation and some healing. Finally the time comes for Ranma to head back to Narima and fight Happosai. On his way out of Kami’s house Kami hands him ten golden coins bearing the sign of the Eye of Ra. All he tells Ranma is that he got them from an old friend named Tut and that Ranma should put them to good use. Ranma of course thanks Kami and then uses his psionic power to levitate his two slaves and himself down ten miles to the ground.
| Nabiki | Once again time flies when your a pervert. |
| Goku | So he rewards the pervert by giving him gold coins. I only got a new change of clothes. |
| Akane | Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung being enslaved does not effect Lemon Otaku or Kami at all. |
| Ukyo | I guess the author hit the Sake again. |
| Ryoga | And Kami is not fazed at all by Lemon Otaku’s actions. |
“Ok slaves, I haven’t touched you yet out of respect for Kami-sensei, but all that is going to change now that we are heading back to Japan. First thing I’m going to do is give you your personality back, since I simply repressed it instead of erasing it. I’m going to make it so that you may decide what you want to do and even whether or not you want to follow my orders, unless I say ‘I order you to…’ and then give you an order. Even if I don’t use those words I want you to consider that if you disobey me I will punish you. You are my slaves, now and until the day you die.” states Ranma. While he was saying this he releases the controls he had on his slaves and implants the new controls. “I order you to not return to your village. I order you to not try to contact anyone in your village, or try and harm me either by action or inaction. I order you to call me Master, unless we are in public. Do you understand?”
| Dr. Tofu | Ok so he did not touch them, and yet he enslaved them, took away all free will, and treated them like dogs while up on Kami’s lookout. I am so impressed. |
| Kasumi | :: Walks in, Dr. Tofu starts talking to Betty :: Oh my, poor Dr. Tofu. |
| Nabiki | Where to start? He says he is giving them their personalities back and claims “I’m going to make it so that you may decide what you want to do and even whether or not you want to follow my orders” but then says “unless I say ‘I order you to…’ and then give you an order.”. Then he talks about punishment if they disobey him. |
| Akane | So they have no free will. I am glad I am not engaged to Lemon Otaku, I would kill him. |
| Ranma | So would I. |
| Nodoka | He is dishonoring his family by doing that. |
| Genma | :: Splashes himself with Hot Water:: We have to come up with a new name for the Genma in that fic. There is no way my son would behave like that. |
| Soun | There is no way he would be allowed in my house. Not around my daughters. |
| Ukyo | Ranchan would never do that to any woman. Now Lemon Otaku is obviously not a martial artist and has no honor. |
| Xiam Pu | Xiam Pu no would marry Lemon Otaku. |
| Mu Tsu | I would smite Lemon Otaku if he touched my precious Xiam Pu. |
| Happosai | My disciple has exceeded his master in the area of perverseness. |
| Ling-Ling | Ling-Ling have no free will. |
| Lung-Lung | Lung-Lung would harm pervert Lemon Otaku. |
“Yes Master” LinLin and RanRan chorus.
“Good, now let’s go.” Ranma says.
| Ryoga | Go where? Back to reality? |
With that said the trio heads off after a little bit of walking LinLin and RanRan drop back a little to talk to each other, since he has no problem with this Ranma allows it.
“You think Master serious? You think Master punish LinLin and RanRan if no do what Master says?” LinLin asks her sister.
“RanRan ot know, LinLin. Probably Master serious, LinLin want to test?” RanRan replies.
“LinLin no want to test now.” states LinLin.
| Nabiki | Ok, if they wanted to test Lemon Otaku they would run away as fast as they could. |
| Goku | I think I am going to go home now, isn’t it dinner time. |
| Ryoga | You ate 2 hours ago. |
| Goku | It is dinner time then. Bye bye. |
| Nabiki | He gets to leave, we have to stay here. |
| Soun | :: Starts crying, again:: |
Ranma just smirks and tells the girls to walk next to him from now on. They proceed through the Qinghai region of China towards Beijing. After several hours of walking Ranma finally decides its time to stop for the night.
| Ranma | So without a map I figure out where I am in China? |
| Akane | Without eating or drinking any food? |
“LinLin, you will cook dinner, while RanRan sets up the tent. You two will sleep inside the tent and I will sleep outside.” Ranma tells them
| Ryoga | Ignoring the fact that they haven’t eaten all day. |
| Ukyo | So, Lemon Otaku is going to do nothing? |
| Ling-Ling | Why pervert no do anything. |
| Lung-Lung | Pervert lazy. |
| Nabiki | Maybe he is going go hit the sake. He is Lemon Otaku after all. |
“Yes Master” the slaves respond as they set off to do their assigned tasks.
| Ling-Ling | No Master. |
| Lung-Lung | Kill Pervert. |
Ranma smiles at this and thinks about why he’s keeping them. He finally decides that he’s keeping them as slaves for several reasons; firstly to teach them a women’s true place, secondly because they would get more of the Amazons to come after him if they returned without him, and finally for revenge. He still remembers them attacking him when they were visiting Xiam Pu. Finally LinLin brings him some food and they sit down to eat.
| Ling-Ling | We no attack Xiam-Pu husband, he make that up. |
| Lung-Lung | Xiam-Pu husband attack Ling-Ling and Lung-Lung. |
| Nabiki | The “Ranma” on the screen is Lemon Otaku. Ranma is sitting next to you. |
| Ranma | Duh. |
| Ling-Ling | Oh, now make sense. |
| Lung-Lung | They look same. Me no like Lemon Otaku. He bad Pervert boy. |
| Ling-Ling | Kill Lemon Otaku, no kill Ranma. |
| Xiam-Pu | Aiyaa, Sisters got right. |
“We will be stopping in Beijing to get the two of you some clothing. While there the two of you will stay in the hotel room that I will get until I return, I will also be getting us some plane tickets back to Japan.” Ranma states. “Now, let’s get some sleep.”
| Ling-Ling | Ling-Ling no sneak off? |
| Lung-Lung | Lung-Lung no kill Lemon Otaku? |
The two former Amazons head into the tent and Ranma sets up his bed right in front of the entrance. He falls asleep shortly after hearing his two slaves fall asleep. The next morning he pops his head into the tent and wakes them up.
| Ling-Ling | Ling-Ling test powers. Ling-Ling Chop head off. |
| Lung-Lung | He find tent empty. |
“LinLin, RanRan, you will both pack up the tent and the camping equipment. And hurry up about it” Ranma says.
| Ling-Ling | Pervert too lazy to do anything? |
| Lung-Lung | Maybe he cook breakfast? |
“Yes Master” RanRan and LinLin replies. The two work together and have everything ready to go in five minutes.
Once everything is ready Ranma simply starts walking causing LinLin and RanRan to hurry up to catch up to him. They travel for several hours before finally arriving in Beijing. The first thing Ranma does is go to a Museum and talks to the curator. After a few minutes of haggling Ranma gets a total of fifty million dollars for the ten coins. Ranma thanks the curator and heads down the street a short way till he reaches a hotel. The trio walks into the lobby where Ranma gets a room. Ranma leads LinLin and RanRan up to the room.
| Ling-Ling | No breakfast? |
| Lung-Lung | Why pervert get American Money in China? |
“Now, while I am out I want the two of you to take a bath and get cleaned up. I want supper ready in two hours. Also, you both will wait on the couch naked for me to return, at which time you will get your new clothes. I don’t know how long I will be gone so I suggest that one of you starts dinner while the other one showers and then switch. I don’t care how you do it. Oh, and you both are forbidden to leave the hotel room.” Ranma commands them.
| Nabiki | Who can cook a meal in a hotel room. |
| Kasumi | There’s no kitchen. Lemon Otaku is very dense. |
| Ranma | I guess they are cooking in the bathroom. |
| Kasumi | Oh my, they didn’t go by a grocery store, so how can they cook dinner? |
| Nabiki | Maybe they are going to cook Lemon Otaku some shit. |
| Ryoga | I don’t want to eat what they are cooking then. |
| Ling-Ling | Why we no leave hotel room? |
| Lung-Lung | Why we no wear clothes? |
“Understood Master.” LinLin and RanRan reply.
| Ling-Ling | This no Army. |
| Lung-Lung | No understand, no Master. |
| Lemon Otaku then walks into the theatre followed by Q. Q looks at the cast and says “Lemon Otaku has something to say to you. I will give you this one chance to “talk”. Don’t kill him.” | |
| Lemon Otaku | The author of the Fan Fic is GOD! Stop calling the Ranma in my Fan Fic Lemon Otaku. Don’t flame the author, if you flame the author, the author flames you. Bwa Haa Ha H…. |
| Kasumi | :: Hits Lemon Otaku with Ukyo’s giant spatula :: Oh my, I did something evil. |
| Q | No Kasumi, you did something good. |
| The rest of the Ranma Nibun No Ichi cast then proceed to beat the crap out of Lemon Otaku. After a few hours Q dragged Lemon Otaku home. | |
| Back In Washu’s Lab | |
| Q | Ok, they crushed, destroyed, smashed, and broke every bone in his body. Smashed all his muscles. Did damage to every internal orgain. And threw what was left him into the trash can. If it where not for the fact I stepped in he would be dead. |
| Washu | I cant believe that moron Lemon Otaku actually believed that he is God of his Fan Fic. The original Fan Fic, sure. But not the MST, especially when someone else is MSTing it. Hell, I am surprised he said, “You Flame the Author He Flames You.” |
| Q | Well with this author… |
| Washu | For those of you wondering, Yes Lemon Otaku really did make a guest
appearance. The authors of Ranma Nibun No Ichi MST2K. know him in real life. |
| Back in the theatre | |
| Ranma | That was fun |
| Ryoga | We got to beat up the author. |
| Nabiki | Of course now Lemon Otaku will probably write even more chapters just to drive us nuts. |
| Nodoka | Damn, if Q had not saved his life. I mean I cut off his head and threw in the trash can. |
| Nabiki | Which head did you cut off again? |
| Nodoka | I cut off both for honor sake. |
| Nabiki | Did Q put both back on. |
| Q | ::Flashes in::Ok people the MST is not supposed to be worse than the Fan-Fic. No more castrating the author. |
| Everyone | Ahh Man. |
| Q | Ok now that the author has said his peace and nearly died the fan fic will restart in 2 minutes. :: Disappears in a flash :: |
| Happosai | And I threw a Happo Fire Burst into the can vaporizing his body. |
| Ukyo | And Q just snapped his fingers… |
| Genma | Oh well it was fun while it lasted. |
| Ranma | At least we drilled it into his thick skull we where not flaming the author, we just got sick of calling the Ranma from his Fic, Ranma. |
| Ryoga | Q said he would explain it to him. |
Ranma leaves the hotel room and locks the door. He first sets off to a nearby Japanese clothing store where he buys school uniforms for the girls. He has them tailored while he gets a taxi and goes to an airport to get airline tickets. After a fifteen minute taxi ride he finally arrives at the airport. He walks up to the ticket counter and gets three tickets to Tokyo Japan. After five minutes he gets back into the taxi, which he had wait for him and takes another fifteen minute ride back to the clothing store. He ends up having to wait about fifteen minutes before the modified uniforms are done, during which time he buys the girls panties. Once he has the clothes he needs he walks to a shady part of town and into a novelty store. He walks around for a little while and picks out two dildos, four vibrators, and some rope. The two dildos are about eight inches long and an inch thick. Two of the vibrators are the same size while the other two are slightly larger at about twelve inches long and three inches thick. After paying for his purchases he leaves the store and heads to the pet store he saw near the hotel. He goes in and buys two non-studded leather dog collars and a couple of leashes. He finally heads back to the hotel. When he opens the door he sees LinLin and RanRan sitting on the couch nude and blushing. He tosses them both a pair of panties and a school uniform. They start to head towards (a) the bathroom to get dressed when Ranma clears his throat. The both stop and look at him. They see him shake his head and both put on their panties and uniform.
| Nabiki | Japanese clothing store in China… |
| Happosai | Panties… He bought them panties? |
| Nabiki | “two dildos, four vibrators, and some rope”? |
| Akane | “The two dildos are about eight inches long and an inch thick.”? |
| Ukyo | “Two of the vibrators are the same size while the other two are slightly larger at about twelve inches long and three inches thick.”? |
| Ling-Ling | Ling-Ling cry, sick man. |
| Lung-Lung | No man this Lemon Otaku be. |
| Nabiki | Wow what a gentlemen, he did not get the studded collars. |
| Ryoga | So nobody commented on his purchases, seeing how he is carrying them around town. |
| Nodoka | So Lemon Otaku does not get them bras? |
| Nabiki | He must not know much about women. |
“Very good, now, I believe supper will be in about ten minutes so RanRan, you set the table and LinLin you get the food.” Ranma says. They all sit down to eat ten minutes later.
| Ling-Ling | How he know dinner be done. He not get in more than 2 minutes. |
| Lung-Lung | He must smell bathroom and thought that his dinner. |
| Ranma | I was right, that is the kitchen. |
“Master, where bra?” RanRan asks
“Slaves don’t wear bra’s RanRan.” Ranma replies
| Lung-Lung | Name no RanRan |
| Ling-Ling | Ling-Ling no slave, Lemon Otaku no Master. We wear bra, he choke on dildo. |
| Lung-Lung | What dildo? |
| Nabiki | An Artificial imitation of something Lemon Otaku wishes he had. |
“Master, where LinLin, RanRan, and Master sleep? Hotel have one bed and one room.” LinLin asks
| Ling-Ling | One room, no kitchen? |
| Lung-Lung | Ranma right, it the bathroom. |
“Well, the two of you will sleep on the floor next to the bed and I will be sleeping on the bed. Now, its time for bed. We have to wake up early tomorrow; our plane leaves at nine tomorrow morning.” Ranma answers
| Ling-Ling | We no Inu-Yasha, he sleep on floor, we don’t. |
| Lung-Lung | Pervert sleep floor, we sleep bed. |
| Nabiki | Wow, he’s a real gentlemen. |
| Ukyo | Boy, Ranma why cant you be like that. |
| Ranma | I would never go out and buy those things. I don’t need them. |
| Nabiki | Hmm, is that true Akane? |
| Akane | :: Blush :: |
“Yes Master.” both girls reply.
| Ling-Ling | This no Army. |
| Lung-Lung | No understand, no Master. |
The next morning Ranma wakes both girls up at six and has RanRan cook while he has LinLin clean the room and pack everything so that they can leave. They eat breakfast half an hour later and leave for the airport at seven. They check in their bags and wait for their flight time. While they wait Ranma quizzes them to find out more about them, mostly their like and dislikes. Their flight is a fairly uneventful one and once in Tokyo Ranma leads the way to a realtor’s office to buy a house.
| Nodoka | Ok why didn’t they ditch him? He said “order you to not return to your village. I order you to not try to contact anyone in your village” That means they can contact Xiam-Pu. She is part of their tribe, but not part of their village. She kinda of lives in Japan. |
| Akane | So they finally get to eat a breakfast. |
| Nabiki | So where did the bags come from? |
| Ryoga | Must have appeared magically when the author got drunk. |
| Mu Tsu | The author blacked out again? |
| Ling-Ling | Ling-Ling cook in bathroom again? |
| Lung-Lung | No sake for Lemon Otaku. |
“I understand you want to buy a mansion outside of Tokyo.” the realtor states pleasantly.
| Akane | So this realtor already knows where Ranma wants a house, and knows he wants a house. |
| Kasumi | No Akane, he also knows he wants a Mansion. |
“That’s right, I’m hoping there’s one already built and at least partially furnished.” Ranma replies
| Nabiki | Ok, so is counting on someone building a house and counting that they have not moved in. |
“As it happens an American businessman recently put a large, well furnished mansion on the market. It has about twenty-five rooms, fifteen full bathrooms, a full basement, and even a swimming pool. It’s sitting on ten acres of land. He’s selling it because he has pressing business back in the US. He’s asking for five million dollars though.” The realtor says
| Ling-Ling | House appear magically? |
| Genma | Gee I never got a deal like that, I never knew houses went that cheap. |
| Lung-Lung | Land no sell that cheap in Japan. |
| Nabiki | A piece of land in Japan usually sells for 1 million dollars and it is the size of a newspaper. He bought ten acres and a Mansion (Finished) for only 5 Million Dollars. |
| Akane | Why would a Japanese mansion be sold for American Dollars? |
| Ukyo | Another Plot Hole. |
“Oh, that’s not a problem, may I pay in cash?” Ranma replies with a smirk
| Ranma | So I guess its normal for someone to carry a few million dollars in their pocket and not have it picked? |
| Nabiki | How did he get that in his pocket anyway? |
| Mu Tsu | When did Lemon Otaku steal my techniques? |
“S s sure, just let me write up the paperwork real quick and the house will be yours.” The realtor stutters
| Nabiki | Houses don’t usually sell that fast. |
| Ranma | Isn’t he going to check with the owner first? |
The realtor finishes writing up the paperwork in about five minutes and soon after Ranma pays for his new home. He leads his two slaves outside and flags down a taxi. They take the taxi to the mansion and Ranma has his slaves carry in all the luggage. Once everything is moved in Ranma and his two slaves take a quick tour of the mansion, ending up back in the entry way.
| Ling-Ling | Pervert luggage grow? |
| Nabiki | That’s because nothing else Lemon Otaku owns grows. |
| Lung-Lung | Why paperwork so fast? |
“Ok, now, new rules. As you will notice I only gave you two one pair of panties. That is because the only time you may wear panties is when outside of our yard. Also from now on you two are to shave your pussies, armpits, and legs everyday. I’m going to head out to get some food and set up a bank account. I should be back in about two hours, but you never know. I’m going to leave two dog collars, and some Nair sitting on the table by the door. By the time I get back I expect you two to have no hair below that which is on your head, have no panties on, and put the dog collars on.” Ranma states seriously
| Akane | You can’t shave with Nair! |
| Ranma | Ok so he wants them to shave everyday, with Nair! |
| Nabiki | Oh, that would burn! |
| Ukyo | Just a little! |
| Kasumi | In sensitive areas? Oh my, what a mean man. |
| Dr. Tofu | Don’t worry Kasumi, I will protect you. :: Says Dr. Tofu to betty :: |
| Kasumi | How sweet. Dr. Tofu’s so silly. |
| Everybody else | :: Perfect Tear :: |
| Ling-Ling | He treat us worse than Kagome treat Inu-Yasha. |
| Lung-Lung | Hold on, I call Kagome. |
With that said he leaves. He reverses the order slightly, setting up a checking account with five million dollars in it and a savings account with the rest of the money in it. He also sets it up so that at the beginning of each month half the interest from the savings account is sent to his checking account. Once that’s done he heads off to buy some food. He spends an hour and a half buying all sorts of food. After he’s got everything he wants and pays for it he takes a taxi back to the mansion and carries all the bags into the entry way. He pays the taxi driver and calls his slaves in.
| Nabiki | I guess since Lemon Otaku is messed up in the head, he would get the order reversed. |
| Ukyo | He opened a account that fast? |
| Ling-Ling | He carry something? |
| Ranma | “He pays the taxi driver and calls his slaves in.” Wait a minute, I thought the girls where in the house? |
| Lung-Lung | Taxi driver in house, or we in taxi? |
| Ling-Ling | We go home! |
“Well, have you done as I have asked?” Ranma inquires
| Ling-Ling | No, we no kill you. |
| Lung-Lung | Yet! Amazon law say we kill you. I talk Kagome, she come next chapter. |
“Yes Master” both slaves answer
| Ling-Ling | This no Army. |
| Lung-Lung | No understand, no Master. |
Ranma can see that they do indeed have their dog collars on.
| Akane | But notices that they are not dogs. |
| Kasumi | Lemon Otaku says, “No, you where supposed to put them on the puppies, not on you.” |
| Ling-Ling | You write, you better than author. |
| Lung-Lung | Lung-Lung like Kasumi ideas better. |
| Nabiki | Ok lets take a vote, all in favor of Lemon Otaku writing the rest of the fic. |
| Everyone | :: Dead Quiet :: |
| Nabiki | All in favor of Kasumi writing it? |
| Everyone | :: Shouting :: KASUMI! |
“Lift your skirts” He orders
| Ling-Ling | Me no wear skirt. |
| Lung-Lung | You lift skirt. |
| Nabiki | Ok so now they are Scottish? |
| Akane | Isn’t Deanna Troi coming to watch the next chapter? |
| Ukyo | So Obi-Wan Kenobi is in the fic? |
LinLin and RanRan reluctantly lift their skirts showing that they are still wearing panties. Ranma walks up to them and rips the panties off to find that the also haven’t shaved.
| Nabiki | Yeah, you didn’t give them any shaving equipment, check the rest of their bodies, pervert. |
“I gave you over two hours to get a few simple things done. I guess you finally decided that I wasn’t serious when we were in China. Well, now you’re going to find out how serious I was.” Ranma angrily says.
| Ling-Ling | We kill you now. |
| Lung-Lung | Nabiki right, how we shave with just Nair? |
| Ling-Ling | Where one foot vibrator, we stick up…. |
| Everyone | :: Grabs Ling-Ling’s mouth :: Shhhh, he would like it too much. |
| Happosai | Hmmm, now whats this guy’s name again? |
| Ranma | Lemon Otaku. |
With that he pulls out two leashes and clips them onto the dog collars. He pulls both girls to the living room and ties LinLin’s leash to the base of the coffee table so that she has to kneel to be comfortable. He then sits down on the couch and yanks RanRan’s leash so that she falls across his lap.
| Akane | Boy the pervert figured out how to use the leashes with no training. |
“I warned you cunts that if you disobeyed me you would be punished. Now, you’ve not only disobeyed me, but you tried to lie to me.” Ranma states evenly
| Ling-Ling | How we shave with no shaving equipment? |
| Lung-Lung | Nabiki right, how we supposed to shave? |
He ties the end of RanRan’s leash to one of the legs on the couch, effectively trapping her on his lap until he decides to release
| Ling-Ling | Release what? |
| Lung-Lung | He release us, we go home! |
her. Once that’s done he flips up her skirt and starts spanking her. After the second slap RanRan was sobbing heavily. Ranma gives her five more slaps before he slides his hand down and cups her pussy. Finding it wet, Ranma grins.
| Ling-Ling | Ahh man, no release us! |
| Lung-Lung | He sick, he spank so hard he make Lung-Lung cry. Tear land on pervert hand. |
| Nabiki | Why is he only punishing one? |
| Xiam-Pu | Why he do that sisters. Xiam-Pu kill. |
“Well, that was for disobeying me, now for lying to me.” Ranma says.
| Ling-Ling | When Ling-Ling say me obey? |
| Lung-Lung | When Lung-Lung say me obey? |
| Nabiki | Must have been when Lemon Otaku passed out. |
With that he unlatches the leash from RanRan’s collar and forcefully stands her up. He then removes his pants and boxers. Upon seeing Ranma’s hard on RanRan gets a terrified look in her eyes. Ranma the grabs RanRan and spreads her legs while pulling her onto him. He holds her about an inch above his cock before lowering her down so the head is just a little way into her pussy. Once he’s sure he won’t pop out he simply lets her go causing her to impale herself on all twelve inches. She starts sobbing even harder when he’s fully seated in her. After a few seconds Ranma spanks her butt hard, causing her to jump. Once she settles back down Ranma spanks her again with similar results. Again she settles down to the base of Ranma’s penis, and again he spanks her. Finally she gets the point and starts moving up and down his cock. Ranma grins, and glances at LinLin who looks at him with some fear in her eyes. As RanRan moves up and down on Ranma he reaches down and plays with her clit, causing her to moan in pleasure, and grind herself onto him even more. After a few minutes of this stimulation Ranma groans and cums inside RanRan. He allows her to continue pumping him as he shrinks inside of her until she is just about to cum herself, at which time he pulls her off. RanRan moans at not being able to cum and moves her hands down to finish the job herself. Ranma grabs both her hands in one of his and uses the other to direct her face so she’s looking at him.
| Dr. Tofu | I had no idea Ranma’s penis was that big, did you know that Betty? |
| Kasumi | My name is Kasumi, not Betty. |
| Nabiki | Is it really that big Akane? |
| Akane | * Blush * |
| Ling-Ling | Pervert author dreaming. |
| Lung-Lung | Bad dream, Lung-Lung no want to be in dream. |
| Nodoka | That is not my son, we raised him better than that. I should talk to Lemon Otaku’s mother. |
| Genma | I should talk to his Father. |
“Now, RanRan, you are to clean me off and get me hard for your sister.” Ranma states with a grin.
| Nabiki | Because Lemon Otaku is too lazy to clean himself. |
| Akane | Plus he needs help to get hard. |
| Ukyo | Viagra? |
“Master, please, let me cum.” RanRan pleads.
| Nabiki | I don’t think she needs his help or permission to do that. |
“No, now clean me off and get me hard for your sister, or you will be punished.” Ranma commands.
| Lung-Lung | Punished? You just punish her. |
| Ling-Ling | Bad pervert. |
| Akane | Let me guess if they behave he doesn’t rape them? |
| Ukyo | I guess the author is warped in the head. |
RanRan sinks to her knees in front of Ranma and starts sucking on his penis. She slowly bobs her head up and down while using her tongue to play with the shaft. After a few minutes Ranma becomes hard again.
| Ling-Ling | When Ling-Ling learn to do that. |
| Lung-Lung | Why sister no bite? |
| Kasumi | Should they be watching this? |
| Q | :: Flashes in :: You are right Kasumi. Ling-Ling, Lung-Lung, come with me. |
| Ling-Ling | We go play Enterprise? |
| Lung-Lung | We meet Picard, again? |
| Q | :: Smiles :: Why not :: Snaps his fingers and they disappear :: |
| Ryoga | They get to leave, we are still stuck here. |
| Washu | :: Bwaa haa haa ha :: |
“You may stop now RanRan.” Ranma says.
| Akane | Red Light |
| Ukyo | Green Light |
| Nabiki | Red Light |
RanRan reluctantly lets Ranma’s, now hard, penis slip from her mouth and clips the leash back on her own collar, causing Ranma to smile. Ranma decides to see just how much she has willingly, without his powers being used, submitted to his will.
| Nabiki | So the author admits that Lemon Otaku forced her to do that. |
| Ukyo | Free will… |
“RanRan, please untie your sisters leash from the table and lay her across my lap.” Ranma tells RanRan.
| Akane | He is too lazy to do anything. |
| Ukyo | Isn’t he standing up? |
| Ranma | I guess sitting down isn’t important enough, so the author left that scene out. |
“Sister, you no do this, please.” LinLin begs.
| Xiam-Pu | Lung-Lung no do that. |
“Be quiet LinLin or you’ll be punished worse.” Ranma commands.
| Akane | There is worse than what he is doing to them? |
| Happosai | He is a bigger pervert than me. |
RanRan unties the leash from the table and gently tugs the leash to lead her sister to the left side of Ranma, at which time RanRan yanks on the leash causing LinLin to fall across Ranma’s lap.
“Now RanRan, you will spank your sister at least six times and each one must be at least as hard, if not harder, than I spanked you. Understand?” Ranma says
| Soun | He is so tired and weak that he can’t do it himself. What a pathetic lazy excuse of man this Lemon Otaku is. I would never let him near my daughters. |
“Yes Master, RanRan-dorei understand.” RanRan replies happily.
| Nabiki | Happily? He just raped her and now she is happy? |
| Ukyo | Plus she is calling herself a dorei (Means Slave)? |
| Akane | Don’t forget she is calling it her Master. |
“RanRan, no spank LinLin, please no spank LinLin” LinLin pleads.
| Ryoga | Poor Ling-Ling, how much more of this is there? |
| Ranma | The author is a pervert, we don’t want to know. |
“RanRan, wait. LinLin, I told you to be quiet or you punishment would be worse, you chose to speak again. RanRan, you will also spank you sisters cunt six times with the same strength you spank her butt, understand?” Ranma asks.
| Nodoka | So his way of punishing her is making her sister spank her more? |
“RanRan-dorei understand and happily obey Master” RanRan replies.
| Ukyo | Ok, so now she is happy to punish her sister to please the man who just rapped her? |
| Xiam-Pu | Xiam-Pu no like this scene. |
With that RanRan ties her sister’s leash to the leg of the couch and flips up LinLin‘s skirt. RanRan’s (hits) spanks her sister with about three-fourths of her full strength and the first spank falls on LinLin’s exposed ass. LinLin starts crying and begs her sister not to spank her. RanRan then gently kicks her sisters feet apart, and spanks her sisters, now more exposed, cunt. At this point all LinLin can do is sob, while RanRan again spanks her ass. RanRan alternates between LinLin’s ass and cunt for the full six spanks at which time RanRan kneels in front of Ranma.
| Ryoga | I thought she was across his lab, not in front of him. |
| Ranma | I guess the author don’t know the difference. |
| Nabiki | Not only is that scene pointless but its disgusting. |
“RanRan-dorei is done Master” RanRan states with her eyes down cast.
| Soun | Kasumi, stand behind me you don’t need to watch this trash. :: While shaking his head back and forth and crying:: |
“Very good RanRan, now do you wish to help me take your sisters virginity?” Ranma enquires of RanRan.
| Nodoka | He is asking her to help him steal her sister’s virginity with the subtlety of a Lead Balloon trying to fly over Tokyo. |
| Akane | Once again, Lemon Otaku cannot do anything by himself. |
“Yes Master, RanRan-dorei wish very much.” RanRan enthuses.
| Ryoga | Excuse me, I need to go puke in the bathroom. |
| Ranma | I need to puke as well, hey Lemon Otaku does need his dinner after all… |
| Akane | Yeah “RanRan-dorei wish very much” to kill the pervert. |
“Ok, unhook your sister’s leash from her collar then lift her up. Once she’s positioned correctly I want you to use all your strength to force her down.” Ranma commands.
| Kasumi | Dr. Tofu lets go to the Kitchen, everyone else is puking in a pot. |
| Ranma | Let me guess, that is Lemon Otaku’s breakfast? |
| Ryoga | That is the plan. |
Upon receiving her orders RanRan quickly obeys. She unhooks her sister’s leash and easily lifts the sobbing girl up. RanRan quickly maneuvers LinLin onto Ranma’s penis and shoves her sister so that Ranma’s cock is fully inside LinLin. Ranma spanks LinLin’s ass causing her to jump slightly. She quickly settles down, when Ranma spanks her again. She jumps again, but still refuses to move on her own accord.
:: Everyone is in the kitchen puking, so no one saw that scene ::
“RanRan, you will now move your sister up and down on my penis since she refuses to do it herself.” Ranma orders.
| Nabiki | Because he is too lazy. :: Yelling from the kitchen :: |
With that said RanRan reaches under her sister’s arms and slowly moves her sister up and down Ranma’s penis. Ranma reaches down and plays with LinLin’s clit. LinLin stubbornly refuses to show any pleasure and after a few minutes Ranma cums in LinLin. He yanks her off and looks at her.
| Genma | :: Yelling from the kitchen :: Lemon Otaku is raping some pre-teen girls. Come pick him up, the address is …. Yes Officer he is right here. |
“LinLin, you are to go take a shower while I talk to your sister, while there you will shave your armpits, arms, legs, and pussy. You will not use the toilet; only good slaves get to use the toilet. From now on your toilet will be outside on the lawn. You will obey me quickly and quietly or you will be punished. Do you understand?” Ranma states evenly
| Nabiki | So she gets to escape? |
| Ryoga | He did not say they cant leave the mansion, and there is no fence. |
“LinLin understand Master” LinLin replies curtly.
| Xiam-Pu | Ling-Ling understand, she go outside and get Xiam-Pu. |
“Good, now go.” Ranma orders. LinLin stalks out of the room while RanRan kneels in front of Ranma. “RanRan, I am very happy with you. I’m going to add to your list of responsibilities. When your sister needs to use the bathroom you will either take her outside yourself or get me, if I’m not busy. You will report any infractions your sister commits. I also expect you to be shaven after you take your shower. Every morning you and I will practice martial arts, you will teach me Amazon techniques while I teach you Saotome Ryu techniques. Do you understand?” Ranma says
| Ku Lon | Why did she betray her sister to please a man that is bent on raping her? |
“Master, RanRan-dorei understand except for word “infractions”. What mean please, Master?” RanRan inquires.
“That means that if your sister breaks any rules or disobeys me you tell me, when I’m not busy. Do you understand everything now?” Ranma asks
| Nabiki | Sure, you are too lazy to watch them. |
| Ukyo | Isn’t it convenient that she is willing to please him, now. |
| Ryoga | Another plot hole. |
“Yes Master, RanRan-dorei understand and happily obeys.” RanRan enthuses.
| Nodoka | So a proud amazon in 2 sentences transform into a extremely submissive sex slave. |
“Good, you may go take your shower now. I have some planning to do. I’ll be heading to Narima on Thursday. While I am gone you and LinLin are to keep the house clean and ready for my return. Oh, and when you take LinLin out to use the bathroom you are to clip on her leash and lead her out there. If I find out you allowed her to use the toilet inside either while I’m here, or while I’m gone, you will be severely punished, and not allowed to use the toilets inside.” Ranma states.
| Nabiki | So he expects them when he gets back? Once again we see the intelligence of the author. |
| Ukyo | So he hasn’t told them they cant leave. Maybe when he gets back he will find a few hundred Amazon waiting for him. |
“Yes Master. RanRan-dorei understand, and thanks Master for allowing RanRan-dorei to live here.” RanRan states. She then stands up and quietly walks out of the room. When she leaves Ranma places a few calls.
| Nabiki | Lung-Lung’s English has improved all of a sudden. |
| Ryoga | Damn Body Snatchers. |
| Ranma | Hey did he give her permission to leave the room? |
| Akane | He’s slipping. |
| Ukyo | It could be he is hitting the Sake again. |
“Yes, Doctor Tofu, I’m glad I caught you between patients. I was wondering if I could get you to help me with something on Friday. I’m going to try and solve the fiancée problem with a debate and I want you to be the moderator. I’ll have a list of questions made up for you to ask.” Ranma says into the phone
| Dr. Tofu | Ok so after the wedding attempt there is fiancée problem? |
| Happosai | I have a Happosai Fire Burst under that chair. Everyone duck. |
| :: BOOM :: | |
| Happosai | Bwaa, Haa, Haa, the pervert is dead! |
“Yes Ranma, I think I can help you with that, do you need me to make any calls to help set it up? I mean you only have four days to set this up.” Tofu inquires.
| Happosai | :: Crying :: I missed. |
| Nabiki | Only four days? That more than enough time. |
“No, that won’t be necessary Doctor Tofu; I’ll get everything set up. Thanks for your help.” Ranma replies.
“No problem. Hopefully the fiancée problem can finally be resolved. Talk to you Friday then. Ja Ne.” Tofu says.
| Akane | Again, this is after the wedding attempt, so why is their a fiancée problem? |
| Ranma | The author must not know a lot about Ranma Nibun no Ichi. |
“I know what you mean Doc, Ja Ne.” Ranma says before hanging up the phone. “Well, that was the easiest one. Now to call the
| Ranma | Police and turn himself in? |
| Ryoga | We can only hope. |
Tendo’s.”
| Soun | Damn. |
“Moshi Moshi, Tendo Dojo, Kasumi speaking,” Kasumi states.
“Kasumi, its Ranma, I’m back in Japan, and should be back home Thursday to deal with Happosai. I also would like for you to inform Akane that she will be having a debate on Friday against Ukyo and Xiam Pu. I’ll explain more when I get back, but I figured I’d give everyone an equal chance.” Ranma requests.
| Akane | Nice, he is telling Akane she has to be at a debate. Like she has no choice. |
| Happosai | He is going to “deal with Happosai”? |
“Oh my, what is the debate about Ranma-kun?” Kasumi asks
| Ranma | To decide who will kill Lemon Otaku. |
| Ryoga | Yes! |
| Nabiki | They should draw straws, it will be easier. |
“To determine which fiancée I will marry. While I was in China my sensei said that I should resolve the fiancée problem. There are a few things I need to wrap up, but I’ll be home Thursday. Could you put pops on?” Ranma asks
| Nodoka | Again, this is after the wedding attempt, so why is their a fiancée problem? |
| Ukyo | So, the bottom line is Lemon Otaku cannot decide which girl he wants to marry. |
| Ryoga | So, instead of being a gentlemen he wants them all. |
| Kuno | Lemon Otaku cannot have my Akane. |
| Kodachi | I think Lemon Otaku has been hanging around my brother too much. |
“Yes Ranma-kun, Ja Ne.”Kasumi replies.
“Ja Ne Kasumi.” Ranma says, after a few seconds he hears his fathers breathing through the phone. “Ah, pops, I’m having a debate to decide which fiancée I will marry. I know you want me to marry Akane, but I can’t just marry her because you want it.” Ranma forcefully states.
| Genma | Again, this is after the wedding attempt, so why is their a fiancée problem? |
| Nodoka | He tried to marry Akane, so why is their a issue now? |
“But Ranma, what about family honor?” Genma inquires.
“Which would you rather have, me marry Akane, or a bottle of Naniichuan?” Ranma asks with a smirk on his face.
| Soun | Marry Akane. |
| Genma | Of course. |
“What ever you decide is good enough for me boy, as long as I get that bottle I’ll get Soun to agree.” Genma quickly replies.
| Nodoka | Damn Body Snatchers. |
| Nabiki | They keep popping up at convenient times. |
“Good, now, try and make sure Ryoga and Mouse are either at the dojo, or at the debate. I’m gonna try and end this petty rivalry with them too.” Ranma says.
| Ryoga | Petty rivalry? There isn’t a “Petty rivalry” between us. |
| Mu Tsu | Lemon Otaku is hitting the Sake, again. |
“No problem boy, Ryoga is here right now, I’ll just tell him that if he stays he’ll be cured.” Genma tells Ranma
| Ryoga | I would stay a lost pig than let Lemon Otaku get his hands on my Akane. |
| Akane | I agree. |
“Good idea, especially since I have Naniichuan for him. Well, I still have to call Ukyo and Xiam Pu, see you Thursday pops.” Ranma says.
“Not if I see you first.” Genma replies just before hanging up.
| Happosai | Not if I kill that pervert Lemon Otaku first. |
“Well, that’s two down and two to go.” Ranma sighs. He then dials up Ukyo’s restaurant.
“Ucchan's Okanmiyaki, what can I get ya.” Ukyo inquires over the phone.
“Ukyo, it’s me, Ranma. I just wanted to tell you that I’ll be back in Narima on Thursday. Also I’m gonna have a debate on Friday to finally end the fiancée problem. You, Akane, and Xiam Pu will be debating against each other. I’m not letting anyone know the questions that will be asked. Just be prepared to argue your case.” Ranma tells Ukyo
| Ukyo | Again, this is after the wedding attempt, so why is their a fiancée problem? |
| Nabiki | Lemon Otaku is sure nice to his fiancées, telling Ukyo that she will be at the debate, like she has no choice. |
| Xiam-Pu | Pervert boy no know women. |
“Ran-chan you jerk, you disappear for a year and then call to tell me, your cute fiancée that I have to debate against Akane and Xiam Pu? With pleasure, I’ll finally prove once and for all why I’m going to be your bride.” Ukyo states.
| Ukyo | Would I really say that? |
| Nabiki | Damn Body Snatchers. |
“Ok, well Ukyo, training took longer than I expected and my sensei didn’t have a phone and it was about ten miles down then fifty miles out to the nearest mailbox. I woulda contacted you all, but I needed to spend my time training to finally defeat Happosai once and for all. Well, I have one more phone call to make and then it’s off to bed for me, I just got back to Japan this morning so I’m a little tired. Ja Ne Ucchan” Ranma says
| Ukyo | Of course he could not have told her before he left that he was going training in China. |
| Nabiki | That would make too much sense. |
| Genma | Wouldn’t Ranma have taken Ukyo with him? |
| Kasumi | Of course, so he would not have to cook. |
“I guess I can understand your reasons Ran-chan, see you Thursday, Ja Ne.” Ukyo says.
| Ukyo | Am I really that naïve, Ranchan? |
| Ranma | No, Uhchan. |
Ranma hangs up the phone and sees RanRan leading LinLin in through the back door by a leash.
| Dr. Tofu | Again, why is he treating them worse than Kagome treats Inu-Yasha? |
| Nabiki | Why are you talking to Betty, again? |
| Kasumi | Oh my, Dr. Tofu is so funny. |
| Akane | Kasumi, maybe you should sit on the other side of the theater, where Dr. Tofu cannot see you. |
“RanRan, come here for a minute, tie the end of you sister’s leash to that banister next to you.” Ranma says
| Nabiki | Yup, he is too lazy to do anything himself. |
RanRan ties LinLin’s leash to the banister and hurries in. Once she’s about three paces from Ranma she drops to her knees.
| Nodoka | Isn’t it nice that Lung-Lung has submitted to Ranma so fast after being raped. |
“RanRan, I’m about to call Xiam Pu. I’m not gonna let her know about you and LinLin being here. I want you to tell me how I can ensure that she will be at the debate with Mu Tsu.” Ranma tells RanRan.
| Nabiki | Hey, Lemon Otaku, why not tell her that you enslaved her little sisters? |
| Ryoga | It make the Fanfic shorter. |
| Ranma | That would be nice. |
| Xiam-Pu | Sister no lie to Xiam-Pu, Xiam-Pu come to save sisters. |
“Master, Xiam Pu go if Xian Pu think will win. Mu Tsu follow Xiam Pu so that be no problem. Elder Ku Lon may be problem. If
| Ku Lon | If Ku Lon finds out what kind of a pervert you are. |
Elder think you danger to Amazons Elder attack. RanRan-dorei no want Master to be hurt. RanRan-dorei wish Master let RanRan-dorei go to debate with Master.” RanRan pleads.
| Nabiki | Gee, she is sure being nice to the man who raped her. |
| Ukyo | Didn’t he rape her less than a hour ago? |
“No RanRan, there would be too many problems if you were to accompany me. Also, who would keep you sister in line while we’re gone? Speaking of which, I am adding yet another rule that just occurred to me. No doors may be locked save the outside doors and any door leading to a room I am in. Make sure your sister understands this as well.” Ranma replies.
| Akane | He has yet to say they cannot leave. |
| Ryoga | What makes the pervert bastard think they are going to be there when he returns? |
| Nodoka | Lemon Otaku must be hitting the Sake, again. |
| Nabiki | So he has privacy, but they don’t. Boy if I could get some pictures, I could totally blackmail this guy. |
“Yes Master. LinLin will be informed of Master’s rules.” RanRan says
| Xiam Pu | Pervert no find Xiam Pu sisters he get back. |
| Genma | Rescue Plan in order, lets head out. |
“Ok, well take you sister to bed then go to bed yourself. I’m gonna call Xiam Pu, shower, then go to bed myself. I’ll wake you up in the morning for practice.” Ranma tells RanRan
| Nabiki | The pervert is going to do something by himself? |
| Ukyo | Wow! |
“Yes Master, RanRan will be ready.” RanRan replies.
| Akane | Ready to kill the pervert. |
| Everyone | Hooray! |
RanRan gets up, walks to the stairs, and unties LinLin’s leash. Once RanRan has lead LinLin up the stairs Ranma picks up the phone to make his final phone call for the night.
| Ranma | “Once RanRan has lead LinLin up the stairs Ranma picks up the phone to make his final phone call for the night.” |
| Nabiki | Ok… I understand half of the sentence. |
| Ryoga | Huh? I didn’t go to High School, but my grammar is better than that. |
| Akane | “Once RanRan has lead LinLin up the stars?” |
| Ukyo | “LinLin up the stairs?” Are they going up the stairs, or is LinLin doing something to the stairs? |
| Ryoga | Wake me if the author says “Out poops Sailor Mercury” |
| Ranma | He calls the police and turns himself in. |
| Everyone | We can only hope. |
“Neko-Hoten, Xiam Pu speak. What Xiam Pu make honored customer?” Xiam Pu says airily over the phone.
“Nothing tonight Xiam Pu…” Ranma says just before Xiam Pu interrupts.
| Dr. Tofu | Just called to tell you I enslaved and raped your little sisters. |
“Husband you back. You take Xiam Pu on date, yes?” Xiam Pu exclaims.
“No, Xiam Pu I called to inform you that there will be a debate on Friday between you, Akane, and Ukyo to decide once and for all who I will marry. I know you think you are already my wife, but Japanese law doesn’t agree. If you ever want to become my wife you will attend the debate. Also, don‘t try to contact me before Friday. I‘m not in Nerima yet.” Ranma states forcefully
| Ryoga | Again, this is after the wedding attempt, so why is their a fiancée problem? |
| Ranma | Lemon Otaku is sure nice to his fiancées, telling Xiam Pu that she will be at the debate, like she has no choice. |
| Xiam-Pu | Pervert boy no know women. |
| Ranma | I agree he knows less about women than I do. |
“Xiam Pu no understand reason for debate, but if make Ranma admit Xiam Pu wife then Xiam Pu will attend.” Xiam Pu replies haughtily.
“Sure Xiam Pu, whatever. Listen; bring Mu Tsu and Ku Lon with you. I want this to be witnessed by them.” Ranma tells Xiam Pu. “Ja Ne Xiam Pu, I just got back to Japan this morning so I’m tired right now.”
“Ja Ne husband. Xiam Pu see you Friday.” Xiam Pu replies happily.
| Happosai | Unless I kill the pervert. Bwaa Haa Haa Ha. |
Ranma sighs as he sets the phone back down.
“Well, it’s all set up. Whoever wins the debate will be my wife. I should probably write up some rules tomorrow… Oh well, time for a shower and bed.” Ranma mutters to himself.
| Ryoga | So he cannot decide anything by himself, and his sex slaves and now he wants a wife. |
| Mu-Tsu | How dare he treat my Xiam-Pu this way. Xiam-Pu you must run away with me. |
| Ranma | Mu-Tsu, that’s Betty. |
Ranma then gets up and heads upstairs to take his shower. He passes LinLin’s room and checks the doorknob and finds it unlocked. After checking her doorknob he heads to the bathroom and takes his shower. When done he doesn’t even bother dressing before walking to his room and going to sleep.
Chapter 1 Complete
| Everyone | ITS OVER! HOORAY! |
Well, Chapter 1 is finally done. I ran into a bit of writers block about halfway
through. That and the fact that I’m in college. I invite anyone who likes my
fanfic to visit my site, www.lemonotaku.habiki.com where you will find the most
up to date releases of “Psionic Ranma” Also, if anyone out there wishes to
write side stories, offer comments, MST this fic, or even draw pictures, please
do and let me know. I would especially love a picture of LinLin and RanRan when
Ranma returns to the Hotel, and when he returns to his mansion. Now for a poll.
Should Ranma enslave all the scouts at one time or use his psionic powers to
have them return to his mansion in groups of two or three? I plan to fully add
in the Scouts in chapter 3 or 5, depending on how many chapters I take up with
the fiancée mess…
Lemon Otaku signing off…
| Everyone | We are MSTing it you sick pervert! |
| Ranma | I hope there aint another chapter. Let alone 4 more. |
| Ryoga | I vote that Ranma gets beat up by the Sailor Scouts, enslaves nobody, releases his slaves, and becomes their slave. |
| Everyone | Agreed. |