Take Off Your Clothes 5:
Love in Vain

by Jeff Rutsch

A warning: Unless your reaction to the above was "Yes!  Another Take
Off Your Clothes Chapter!", followed by a brief dance of joy, you
probably won't like this story and shouldn't read it.  This story is a
little lemon and a little weird.  Oh yeah, and it's the last TOYC.
Oh yeah, please don't judge my writing ability as a whole on this
short ^_^



"C'mon Akane...we can be quick."
"Quick?  What do you mean?"
"Like just a few minutes.  You know, quick."
"That's not what I meant!  How can you just...just up and suggest...of
all the nerve...just up and suggest..."
"Oral sex?"
"Yes!  Get away from me, you pervert!"  Akane was mostly over her
shock and was getting quite angry.
"Akane...please?"
"No!"  Akane hit Ranma for all she was worth.  Ranma was knocked
unconscious by the force of the blow.
     Akane looked down at his body, and talked to herself.
"Even Ranma wouldn't be that much of a jerk.  This must be one of
Cologne's spells or something.  Why doesn't that witch just leave us
alone?!" She grabbed Ranma by the ponytail.
"Off to Dr. Tofu's for you, you big lug."

**

"So what's this?" asked Dr. Tofu, curiously.
"Ranma just...just all of a sudden asked if we wanted to have...oral
sex." Akane blushed. "It was out of nowhere.  I got mad and knocked
him out...but I figured he musta been worked on by that Cologne.  You
remember her, she's the one..."
"Yes, I do remember her." said Dr. Tofu, assertively.
"So, do you think it was her?"
"I can't tell, Akane.  I've only worked on the bump on his head.  You
hit him pretty hard, you know..."
"It's not my fault!  He told me I should..." Akane didn't really want
to finish her sentence.  Not in front of Dr. Tofu.
"Why not?"
"Huh?"
"Why didn't you?"
"Dr. Tofu!" she sounded shocked.
"He's your fiance..."
"Yeah, so?!" Akane looked angry.
"N...Nothing.  Never mind."
"I'm only engaged to Ranma because my parents said so!  Remember
that!" said Akane, anger clearly audible in her voice.
"Ok."
     Akane couldn't quite tell, but she thought she saw half a smirk
on Dr.  Tofu's face as he went back to work on Ranma.  After a bit of
testing he again spoke to Akane.
"Well, he should be waking up soon."
"So, what was the problem?  Was it some potion?"
"No...actually, I didn't see anything unusual.  Maybe it was his own
free will."
"I don't think so."
"Then the other option is it was something with you."
"What?"
"I admit it's unlikely, but it wouldn't be the first time Cologne's
powers worked unexpectedly, from what I hear.  Maybe they were trying
to make you repulsive, and instead make you irresistible."
"Maybe."
"Why don't we go in my other room."
"Oh...okay.  Why?"
"If something might be wrong with you, I'll have to test for it."
     Dr. Tofu led Akane into the other room, locking the door behind him.

**

     Dr. Tofu put a plastic cover over the orniscope and peered inside
Akane's facial orifices.
"Say 'aahh' and open your mouth."
"Ahhhh!!!"
"Hmmm...nothing unusual here..." Dr. Tofu went to consult his book.
Akane looked, uncomfortable.  What could he be checking for?
Nonchalantly, Dr. Tofu turned to face Akane.
"So when's the last time you had sex with Ranma?"
Akane looked at Dr. Tofu, confused.
"Never, of course!"
"It's no big deal, Akane.  Just tell me.  I need to know if I'm going
to make any kind of diagnosis.  Have you..." Dr. Tofu made a lewd
gesture.
"Nev...Never!  What do you take me for?"
"Akane..." Dr. Tofu looked disappointed.  "You don't have to lie to
me.  You can't get better if I don't know the info.  I'm your doctor,
and this information will be kept completely from your parents."
"I..." Akane didn't know how to respond.  "Really.  Never."
"Never?" asked Dr. Tofu, skeptically.  "You're sixteen already.  And
engaged."
"Never!"  Akane was getting a little angry, although she was still too
shocked to be upset.
"Well...hmmm...when's the last time you masturbated?"
"Doctor!"
"Just tell me."  Dr. Tofu's voice was showing signs of both anger and
frustration.
"I never have had sex!  I've never masturbated!"
"So you're trying to tell me you've never..."
"I haven't, OK?"
     Dr. Tofu clearly looked frustrated.  I didn't want to upset him.
But really!  I can't understand why he's so surprised that we
never...went any farther!
     Maybe it's because we're engaged.  Then again, he also said that
I was 16.  Like that was evidence, or something.
     Dr. Tofu put on tight rubber gloves, snapping them against his
skin.
     "Take off your clothes", he commanded.  I obeyed, unthinking.
But I couldn't get the thought out of my mind.  Were all my friends
having sex?
     I knew a few of them were.  I mean, not my best friends, but I
had heard, and overheard, other girls talking about it.
But not my best friends, like Yokho, could she?  I didn't think so.
But then I thought about John, and those vacations she had together.
Camping, and road trips, and the like.  Come to think of it, she had
sort of implied that they were sharing a room.  That didn't
necessarily mean anything, I guess.  But in light of what Dr. Tofu had
said, maybe it did.
     I look down, and Ranma has his face at my crotch.  I can't help
but think of what it's like for Ranma.  Half the time he's as female
as I am...even more so, perhaps.  I don't think I could ever pleasure
another female.  I haven't really thought about it, I guess.  I mean,
not that I wouldn't know what to do, but that I have a
certain...repulsion, sexually, to the female body.  Why?  Social
pressure?  Perhaps I should feel guilty, but despite myself I don't
really care.
     Is it the same for Ranma?  I guess not.  He doesn't consider
himself female, and that's probably where the social pressure comes
from...genders of the same sex, doing...unmentionable acts.
Almost as if to answer my thoughts, Ranma-chan appears to suck my left
breast.  While there's certainly pleasure involved, it's a mixed
pleasure, coming from the knowledge that I'm doing something wrong.
However...perhaps it's the *thrill* of doing something wrong.  If I
knew I would be found out, would I let her continue?  I don't know,
but I think so.
     Ranma backs off.  I can't blame him; I'm surprised he didn't
drown.  We change positions, now it's his turn.
     Maybe it sounds silly, but I've gotten to the point where I
hate myself for not telling Ranma how I feel.  I mean...what if he was
to leave me?  For Ukyou, or Shampoo, or somebody?  I don't know,
really...I suppose I'd die an old maid.  I saw this movie the other
day..."Princess Bride." OK, it was just a kid's movie, but it really
struck me.  Stuff like "only one couple in a century gets a chance at
true love."  Is that what Ranma and I have?  It's weird.  I mean we
always yell at each other, so maybe we don't yet, but we have...the
potential to have some special.  And I really don't think anybody else
I know has a true love.  Even the couples you see that seem to love
each other so much.  Well, maybe they do love each other
but...something seems false.  Like one or the other is compromising
their ideals, their personalities.  That's not love, that's one person
having a fantasy, the other person fulfilling the fantasy.  What is it
that Kunou said the other day?  Something like "Let me not to the
marriage of true minds admit impediments.  Love is not love which
alters when it alteration finds, or bends with the remover to remove:
O no, it is an ever-fixed mark, that looks on the tempests, and is
never shaken; it is the star to every wandering bark, whose worth's
unknown, although his height be taken.  Love's not time's fool, though
rosy lips and cheeks within his bending sickle's compass come; love
alters not with his brief hours and weeks, but bears it out even to
the edge of doom." Did Ranma and I have that?  I hope I don't sound
pretentious when I say "yes."
     I couldn't quite swallow it all.

**

The End!
No more Take Off Your Clothes stories!
I really think I should have ended on #1, or made the others part of a
different series.
But I didn't.
Ha Ha.
I'd appreciate all comments.  Flaming is pointless, because I already
warned you at the beginning ^_^.
I know I'll be asked for an explanation of the whole series, so I'm
currently thinking of one.


****jdrutsch@ucdavis.edu***********************Jeff Rutsch************* 
"Ranma's not a boy...he's a girl!"
"Akane is MY fiancee!  You TOUCH her, and I'll KILL you!"
"Ranma, change back into a boy while I buy you some time."
"But if I seem to act unkind/it's only me, it's not my mind."
"Ranma [sic],/give your heart to Akane [sic]. /Soon,/right away."
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