Disclaimer: Rights belong to Rumiko Takahashi and she would probably never condone me fucking with her characters like this. But if you're gonna sue somebody for this, let it be someone richer... Warnings: Male/male smooching and stuff. No particularly foul language, except in the disclaimer. ============================= Ranma felt the dust tickle his eyes and nose, and sneezed, squeezing his eyes shut. He could hear Ryouga coughing next to him, which meant he'd breathed the dust, too... Ranma grabbed onto the other man's shoulders for support, and to make sure Ryoga wouldn't go away. He had no idea if he'd made the right choice or not, but there it was, and as soon as his eyes met Ryoga's... well, they might as well be married. But before that, there was something he had to do... Ryoga tried to wipe the tickling dust from his watered eyes. Through the mist, he could make out Ranma's shape. He wanted to look into his eyes, to get it over with before either of them had the chance to change their minds. For some reason, it felt vital they get it over with right now, before the pain grew to be too much again... He felt Ranma grab his shoulders, and then when the mist finally faded, he saw Ranma... with his eyes closed tightly. "Ranma..." He swallowed. "Don't tell me you've already changed your mind...?" "No, no..." Ranma coughed, then pulled Ryoga closer. "But before I look at you..." He blushed. "If I'm gonna be in love with you for the rest of my life... I want to... if just this once, without the drug..." Ranma squeezed his eyes shut tightly, and pulled Ryoga even closer, bringing his face next to the other boy's. "Oh..." Ryoga understood, and suddenly found himself blushing as well. He ignored that fact and closed his own eyes, expecting to feel Ranma's lips on his own. He felt stupid, embarrassed, and wasn't really sure if he wanted to do this (some part of him, deep inside, was running around in circles screaming for him to push Ranma away quick before something terrible happened), but he understood where Ranma was coming from and braced himself for it as for one of Akane's dinners. Nothing happened. Ryoga blinked and looked down. Ranma was facing his chest, eyes hidden beneath black bangs. His grip on Ryoga's shoulders iron-tight, but his whole body was shivering. "Y-you okay?" Ryoga asked, suddenly worried. "I CAN'T DO IT!" Ranma yelled, and hit Ryoga's chest, hard. "How can I stay with you for the rest of my life if I can't even kiss you without a drug?" Ranma drew in a shivering breath. "This was a mistake!" "So what are you going to do about it?" Ryoga asked, suddenly angry. "Dig out your own eyes? It's either me or someone else now!" Ranma felt slightly hysterical. Maybe it was the drug making him feel emotional. "Fine! Rather anyone but you!!" He didn't really know why he said that. All he knew was that at that moment everything in him was saying 'NO' to Ryoga. Not Ryoga. Anyone but Ryoga. Because... because he cared about Ryoga. Of course, Ryoga wouldn't know the reasons behind the denial. Ranma bit his tongue as soon as the words were out, but it was already too late. "...I see," Ryoga said after a long silence. Ranma barely heard the hurt break his voice just once. "In that case, I won't bother you with this again." He turned to leave, but Ranma grabbed onto him tightly. "Arh!" Ranma growled in frustration. "I didn't mean it like that, Ryoga, man. Look..." Ranma sighed, clinging onto Ryoga, who wasn't moving. The lost boy was feeling something... a need to stay put, to let Ranma speak. To let Ranma hold him. "I don't wanna do somethin' like this just cause of some drug, y'know?" Ranma continued. "Just this mornin', we were callin' each other perverts for what we did when we weren't even bein' ourselves, and you yourself said it turns your stomach to think of bein' with me... I mean, if the thought really is that repulsive, don't you think we're... letting go of a really big part of ourselves, y'know?" "Yes," Ryoga breathed. "I am." His eyes were wide open, staring at the ceiling as if he were seeing some sort of a divine revelation in its smooth surface. He was slowly becoming to realize something hugely important about himself, something he had forgotten/ignored/denied for a long time, something so obvious it brought a faint smile of wonder to his lips. "So... I didn't mean I hate you, I just meant..." Ranma felt tears coming, and hated himself for it. "I meant we shouldn't do this just 'cause it hurts too much..." Silently, Ryoga extracted Ranma's arms from around him and held him at an arm's distance. Ranma blinked, but kept his eyes safely averted from Ryoga's. To his surprise, he then felt a hand caress his face softly, thumb trailing across his cheekbone and coming to rest on his lips lightly. Suddenly he knew his whole face was burning bright red. Ranma really had no idea how, exactly, he felt about Ryoga. He'd always liked him, wanted to be his friend, even - maybe especially - when the two of them were fighting. He had somehow assumed that they were friends, and had been hurt when, again and again, Ryoga had attacked him or double-crossed him in some way, threatened to kill him, that sort of stuff. Ever since that bothersome love pill trouble started, he had to admit, another dimension had opened into their relationship. The male Ranma could still remember how it felt to love Ryoga. He could remember how he saw him when he was a she, and even when male, he liked what he saw. Sometimes, when he looked at Ryoga as a man, he was able to see him through his female eyes, with that same kind of halo, the glow that awoke such tenderness in him/her. He hated it. For the first time, he had started to feel real antipathy towards Ryoga, instead of just jealousy or irritation. Love and hate... They seemed to go hand in hand, no matter what he did. Now here they were, Ryoga touching him in a way no NORMAL MAN would ever touch another man, and he felt irritated at the fact that he wasn't really that bothered by it. He knew that if he looked up he would love Ryoga again, at all times, male or female, and that Ryoga would love him back. Suddenly it didn't seem so important anymore who Akane or anyone else dated. Then Ryoga kissed him. It was soft and sweet, and their eyes never met. Their lips lay gently against each other, with only the tiniest bit of friction as Ryoga shifted his mouth a little to fit more snugly against Ranma's. Ranma could feel a shiver inside of himself, and almost sobbed with the force of it. It had no definition he knew of; it was just an intense burning shiver running through his spine. His emotions, as far he could define them, were a mix of fear, passion, anger, sorrow, desire and weakness, and something going 'NO' and 'YES' both at the same time inside of him. He froze, completely motionless under Ryoga's touch. He just couldn't decide which emotion to reveal or conceal. Then Ryoga pulled back, just an inch, catching his breath as if he, too, were going through something tremendous. They both still avoided each other's eyes. Ranma frowned, trying to sort out his head. He knew he'd wanted to kiss Ryoga before they looked at each other, but now he was feeling so uncertain. Was it right or really, really wrong? Ryoga cleared his throat. "Um... I... I think I know now..." He blushed a little, took a deep breath, and then continued. "Everything's over for me now, you know. I lost Akane, or my dream of Akane. She was my last hope of... Ranma, I have to tell you something. Something important." Suddenly Ranma saw it, as if in a revelation. "You always comin' after me tellin' me you hated me..." He was staring at Ryoga's chest but seeing him with new eyes. He felt like he was finally understanding Ryoga, finally realizing why he always acted so stupid and emotional. "It was real, you did hate me, but it wasn't because of bread feuds or piglet curses or anything stupid like that..." "No, it wasn't," Ryoga said. His eyes were wide open now, looking at Ranma's half-turned face, that amazing, dear, shining face that was speaking words that might as well have been directly from a dream. "You like me. You've liked me all along, and that's why you had to hate me, because it was either that or... or like me... too much!" Ranma couldn't help it. He turned his face up, looking at Ryoga's face. But Ryoga's eyes were closed, and he was smiling a little, the look on his face more peaceful than any expression Ranma had ever seen on the boy's face before. "It was either hate you, or get hurt. Because you'd never have had me... and because then I would be something miserable, something less than a real man." Ryoga turned his face upwards, looking aside from Ranma's face. "When I first met you, back in junior high... You were so good at everything you did. I admired you secretly. It... grew. When you defeated me for the first time, I already knew I was probably... in love with you. I think I was baiting you, challenging you... and slowly growing to hate you, to protect myself! I never lied when I said I hated you." "And now?" Ranma asked slowly. "Now I'm tired of hating." He tossed that sentence aside as if it was distasteful to him. "Akane's gone from me forever, so there goes my chance at a normal life. I have nothing left. There's no reason to be afraid of anything anymore! So take me, Ranma, or don't. I already love you." He kept his eyes averted, blushing a little, but Ranma, watching him closely, could see them grow gentle at that last, total offer of self. Silence hung between them for a moment. "...Ever wonder why I agreed to take the drug with you?" Ranma asked, and blushed beef-red as soon as the words were out. There was no backing out now. He gritted his teeth. Ryoga twitched, and frowned. "Didn't think of that, did you?" Ranma said, a hysterical little smile crossing his face. "You always were slow." "What are you saying?" "I'm sayin'... I'm not sayin' I love you or anythin'," Ranma answered a little uncertainly. "But I'm sayin' I want you to look at me." A deep, shivering sigh passed through Ryoga's body. The joy, the release those words brought were almost too much to bear. He wasn't used to feeling so free. He still didn't know how to deal with free. So he just tried to give it a physical out-let. What that amounted to was, he caught Ranma in his arms and pushed him up against the wall, kissing him, hands cupping Ranma's face as passion gripped his entire being, passion for this one person, for the soul he had loved and hated and obsessed over for so long. Even through the mists of hatred, some part of himself had never let go of the love he felt for the boy, the need to follow every movement of his athletic body, the thirst he felt for kind words that were so rare and, when they came, caused such pain in him. This was his Ranma, the real Ranma, not the female body tricking his hetero-wannabe mind into fantasies of perfect love, or a deadly enemy, this was the shining Ranma he had admired, and then loved, in junior high, his light finally shining into the pitch-black loneliness of Ryoga's desperate soul. This was the Ranma his most secret and buried dreams pictured just like this, snug in his arms, strong limbs wrapped around him, mouth open and receptive under his kisses. Ranma had been completely surprised by Ryoga's sudden attack, but after few seconds of disorientation, and yet before clear thought returned to him, a passion arose within, an involuntary reaction as the many heated memories of making love to Ryoga flitted through his mind. His mouth and body melt together with his just like they had the previous night, a natural reaction to this one man. Then his mind caught up with him. 'Ranma!' his mind screamed. 'What the hell do you think you're doing?!' 'Um, I guess I'm making out with Ryoga,' his body answered. 'Hello?! Shouldn't you be a girl for that?!' 'But it feels good.' 'It's WRONG!' 'Why? We've already made love.' 'But that was the GIRL body!' 'So? It was still me. And I like him.' '...' Since the mind was all out of arguments, the body closed its eyes and went back into drowning in the pleasurable sensations. Ryoga was sliding his hands along Ranma's sides, fingers seaching out nerve-endings and rubbing them mercilessly, his chest pressed tightly against Ranma's as their mouths still caressed each other, hazy memories of last night showing him how to get the best reactions out of Ranma. Their tongues were sliding in and out of each other's mouths, Ranma's licking his own in perfect compliance and even enthusiasm. He could feel Ranma's muscles move under the red Chinese shirt, and suddenly found himself hating the cloth that separated them. Some vestiges of self-control remained in him, though, so he didn't quite tear the shirt away. He compromised by sliding his hands downwards to cup Ranma's buttocks. Somehow that allowed Ranma's mind to come to focus with a new argument. 'Hey Ranma! You're not gay! That's why this is wrong!' it announced gleefully. ''Scuse me?!' the body replied. 'I'm gettin' a hard-on over sucking on a guy's tongue!' 'But you've never been like that before! Remember Shampoo? And Akane? You used to be all hot over them!' 'Why are you always complaining about how I feel?! You didn't want Shampoo back when she first appeared and wasn't all... brr... cat-infected! And you were always tellin' me Akane's an uncute tomboy! AND you never let me feel lust over Kodachi 'cause YOU were too scared'a her!' 'Shit! That don't have nothin' to do with this! The point is, you like girls, not guys!' 'I'm the body, I should know, right? Just shut up and let me do what I wanna do for a change, okay?!' With that, the body won the argument. (It's something pretty common with martial artists - an argument can be senseless or sensible, what counts in the end is who has the sternest belief in his own argument. A true martial artist always attacks monsters even if they're not threatening anyone, a true ninja always enters through the window, that sort of thing. It all comes down to honour in the end, and more often than not honour is one of the most senseless inventions of mankind.) '...Well, at least don't do it in the hallway!' the mind grumbled. The body, knowing it had won, considered the suggestion, and agreed. "R-Ryoga," Ranma gasped, hanging onto the other boy. "D'you think we should go somewhere... private for this?" Ryoga extracted his mouth from Ranma's skin to make a sound of agreement, then threw Ranma over one shoulder, getting a breathless giggle out of him. He walked over to the dressing room door, slid it open, and slapped the 'In Use' sign on the door. It slammed closed behind them. *** Nabiki, dressed in a big, hastily thrown on T-shirt, tiptoed quietly out of her room, closing the door silently. The boys deserved their sleep, and she didn't want to wake them up now. She was feeling a little dizzy herself; her feet were unsteady, and for some reason she just couldn't wipe an insistent smirk off her face. What a day and night it had been! Suppressing a small yawn, Nabiki had to admit, the bedsheets beckoned to her, too; however, there were certain things that couldn't wait, such as a good bath. After a night like that, she really needed one. She arrived at the bathroom door, but as she reached out for it she was stopped by a sudden moan that sounded from inside. Curious, she pressed her ear against the door. "Unh... Ahh... Ruh-Ranma..." Ooo. Believe it or not, even Nabiki has some discretion. She washed in the downstairs restroom. *** Ranma was still gasping for air when Ryoga finally rolled over. Every muscle in his body felt exhausted, but he felt soooo good and he couldn't help the small stupid grin that snuck on his lips. Ryoga put his arm around Ranma and moved down for another kiss from those swollen, pliant lips. "Mmmm, Ryoga," Ranma sighed contentedly as he snuggled against Ryoga's chest on the soft carpet of the darkened dressing room. He brushed his lips gently against the other boy's collarbone. Ryoga just hmm'd, too dazed and happy in the warm afterglow to talk, and kissed Ranma's hair gently. Ranma blinked as he noticed the bite mark on Ryoga's shoulder. "Oh yeah... Sorry 'bout that, man. And 'bout the claw marks." He gave a slightly embarrassed laugh. "What? Oh." Ryoga had already forgotten, but now that Ranma mentioned it, he could feel claw-marks burning on his back and a steady throb of pain where teeth had sunk into his flesh. "S'okay," he muttered, and decided to ignore the pain, as he was used to do. Ranma trailed slow little kisses all over Ryoga's chin, just because it was there. Ryoga returned a few of them. "Y'know," Ranma chuckled, "this love drug thing ain't half bad." Ryoga blinked. "Say, did we look in each other's eyes yet?" Ranma frowned, and pondered for a moment. "We must've. Musn't've we? How can you do all that and not even look at the other guy's eyes?" Ryoga thought about it. "I don't remember it. But you'd kinda expect we did." With a groan, Ranma sat up and clicked on the dressing room light. Both boys blinked in the sudden illumination. "I guess we should get dressed..." Ranma said, and turned to peer at Ryoga through the brightening light. "Hm," Ryoga replied, smiling back at him. When their eyes met, it was like they were seeing each other for the first time. Ranma's eyes widened in surprise as he suddenly saw countless nuances in those brown eyes, countless emotions expressed in differently shaded flecks surrounding the deep black irises that seemed to glimmer in the light like stars falling endlessly into bottomless wellsprings. The very essence of Ryoga seemed to flow into him, filling him with strange emotions, like moving currents in the make-up of his very being. He could see those eyes grow gentle, and feel the warm ki flowing between the two of them unboundedly, exchanging and uniting, flowing together like two pools of water. Dazed and strangely reverant, Ranma watched and listened to his sensations as what he felt was something utterly sacred unfolded between them. The emotion ebbed, grew, and strengthened. Tears were streaming from Ryoga's eyes, but he looked happy beyond words. Suddenly Ranma realized that his cheeks were wet as well. Ryoga reached a hand to cup Ranma's cheek and caressed his thumb across Ranma's cheekbone lovingly. "Guess we hadn't, after all," he said, grinning. Ranma laughed, a sound between mirth and tears of happiness, and jumped all over Ryoga, giving him a big wet kiss and making them both crash on the floor in the process. Ranma was kissing him all over the face and neck and chest and Ryoga was kissing him back when he suddenly remembered something. "Hey... Shampoo said this drug was 'mad obsessive love & LUST inducing', didn't she?" "Sure did!" Ranma said cheerfully, grinning like a little devil, and grabbed Ryoga's best friend in a tight and demanding grip. "Ohhhhh-hahhh-hhhh..." Ryoga's eyes nearly bulged out as the intensity of that touch made fire course through his veins once more. Ranma let out a wicked little laugh as he descended once more upon his new-found lover. All through the house, similar acts of love and pleasure brought soft cries on people's lips as limbs entwined and hearts beat to each other's rhythm. Moving in this ancient dance, two people on the soft carpet of the dressing room knew that, whatever it was that tore down the walls between these people, it could not have been for the worst after all. -end overcoming- End Notes: Say what you want, I know those two really want each other!! Back to the Beware of Strange Drugs menu. Back to the AP fanfiction page. Email me at
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