Faking It: Mature Lover [Episode 125794]

“What owes me the pleasure of your visit so soon in the morning, muko-dono?”

Ranma was still smirking as he climbed the backstairs leading to the second floor of the Nekohanten.  Waiting for him on top off the stairs was a gnarled old woman perched atop a staff.  Her long, flowing white hair framed a wizened face reminiscent of an ugly monkey.  Though anybody saying that within her hearing range would probably end up embedded in the nearest concrete object.

Ko Lon’s question was mostly rhetorical, since she could easily guess what was the purpose the young martial artist.  She was nonetheless slightly intrigued, since it was a bit early for the lazy Saotome to show up.  Added to that the fact he was only wearing boxer shorts, since he had been directly thrown out of bed before entering Low Earth Orbit.

“Hiya, Old Ghoul.  Well, Shampoo had just dropped by in my futon again.  But before I could kick her out, Akane had found us, and I’m the one who got malleted away.  Now, those two should keep each other busy for quite some time... if nobody bothers them.  So, I thought, why not go in to say a little ‘ohayo’....”

“I see.  Tsk, tsk, tsk... my poor, wayward, misguided great-granddaughter.  What I have ever done to merit such an unruly child...?  So easily swayed from the pursuit of her rightful husband....”

Ranma, used to Cologne’s fake concern and exaggerated theatrics, snickered.

“Yeah, like you really care.  Say, who told me that Shampoo’s pretend defeat to my boy-side was a golden pretext to get away from those boring Matriarch duties, and take a loooong vacation?”

While Cologne pogo-ed inside the habitation part of the Nekohanten, and the pigtailed boy followed her, the old crone feigned indignation.

“That’s irrelevant... her behavior is still unbefitting of a Joketsuzoku champion.  Opening her legs for any man — or woman — that strike her fancy... and to think she believes I never noticed!  Is she thinking I’m that senile?  That’s so shameful.”

Ranma stifled his laughter with difficulty.  “I think I know from whom she inherited it, though...”

This earned him a glare from Cologne.  “Don’t be disrespectful, Ranma.  I am nowhere that bad.  And I can stay faithful to my man.  Don’t you agree, Airen?”

Ranma rolled his eyes, his mirth not dying down.  “You wanna bring that up again, Old Ghoul?  If I haveta get technical, you were beaten by my girl side... and even by my n-n-n-neko side, in fact.  Try marrying him.”

“Now, now, Ranma, no need to be so defensive.  You know I have no intent of dragging you to my village and force you into a mere trophy husband...”

“That’s nice to hear.”

“... I would then be way too busy keeping you away from the clutches of all those wanton girls.” she concluded solemnly.  She was sincere; Shampoo may be the worst one among her generation, but many of her fellow tribeswomen were nearly as bad.  Here, at least, most of the competition was lesbian.

“Who know, that could be fun...” Ranma joked, grinning.

Cologne frowned; beady eyes half-lidded, she peered intently at the boy.  “I always wondered... how a young, healthy lad like you could have resisted bedding my Shampoo when she basically offered herself.”

This sobered Ranma a bit.  “Hey, I can’t say I was never tempted, but at first, just thinking about all the shit that would stir... no thanks.”  He shrugged.  “And then... I guess I got pretty much desensitized to Shampoo’s blatant come-ons after that time I saw her riding my father....”

The old woman smirked.  “Was it really that sobering?”

“He was a panda.” Ranma somberly added.

She chuckled, while Ranma rolled his eyes.  He didn’t dare telling her about that other time, when he spied on Shampoo with Happōsai.  He wasn’t sure how Cologne would react, but it certainly wouldn’t be pretty.  She still held a lot of scorn for the ancient master of Anything Goes.

“Where is Mousse, by the way?” he asked, changing the topic.

“Don’t worry about Mr. Part-Time.  He made a pest of himself again, so I locked him in his cage in the basement as a duck.”

“So... that mean we have the whole house for ourselves, right?” the pigtailed boy leered.

“You bad boy.  I have a restaurant to open, you know.”

“Come on, you can take the morning off, for once.”

“What for?” she snidely retorted.  “So that you can take advantage of a defenseless, old woman to satisfy your base lusts?”

“Oh, drop the ‘defenseless’ bit...” droned Ranma.  Then he smirked again.  “And while you’re at it, drop the ‘old’ bit too.  I’m tired from looking at you like that.”

“Why, Airen...” she answered in a mockingly indignant tone.  “I thought you loved me for what I am inside... not for my looks!”

“That’s precisely the point.” Ranma stated, hands on his hips.  “So, drop the packaging... now!”

Cologne cackled, finding great humor in the young man’s impatience.  She took no offense from his bossing around, though.  She deemed she had teased him long enough already .

The air shimmered in front of the gnarled old woman, and then it opened, like a curtain in the very fabric of reality.  From the tear stepped out a stunningly gorgeous, young-looking woman.  Behind her, the image of the wizened crone vanished, leaving only the staff that clattered to the floor.

She looked no older than eighteen, with a cute, round face and piercing green eyes.  She had long, flowing hair of a dark blue color, almost black, held by a familiar red headband.  Her green Chinese dress was covering her shoulders but opened in a large V-neckline, showing off lots of cleavage, all the way to the bellybutton.  The thighs were similarly showcased by the side openings, running rather high along the hips.  The long, smooth, sexy legs ended in dainty feet clad in soft slippers.

Delicate red lips curled into a smile as she watched the reaction of her “husband”.  Ranma was lecherously starring at her, licking his dry lips.  Making two short steps, he took her in a warm hug against his unclothed chest.  She was now much closer to his own size, to Ranma’s great relief.

“I can’t understand why you insist on keeping that creepy appearance all the time....”

Cologne-chan smiled, hugging him back.  They already had this conversation many times, but she didn’t mind humoring the silly boy.  “You know that’s the rule of the tribe.  The ancient ones should never show their true form to the outside world.  It would do no good if some foreigners were to learn that the Joketsuzoku possess the secret of prolonged youthfulness.”

“Yeah, but still...” Ranma shrugged. “In your I-don’t-know-how-many-thousands-of-years of history, nobody ever figured out it would be useless to have techniques to live long, but that get you all short and shriveled and reduce your martial art skills?”

The ancient (but well-conserved) woman shook her head.  “Nope... Happōsai had been the closest to find out... but his method is just a watered-down version.”

“Well, he was a gnome anyway.  No big loss.”

“And besides...” she added, hands roaming over his hard pectorals, “... youngsters would never give any respect to their elders if they don’t look their true age.”

“I gave you respect...” Ranma protested.  At the same time, though, his hands were wandering over her back, going lower and lower until they finally cupped her buttocks through the flimsy dress.

Cologne-chan shivered in response, grinding her body against his.  “Right...” she mockingly whispered, “as long as it can get you laid, at least.”

Ranma cut down with the silly talk by capturing her mouth.  They kissed hotly, deeply, hungrily, lips crushing and tongues wrestling for dominance.  The Chinese girl/elder retaliated to his groping by giving a pinch to his hard butt through the boxers.  She arched her back while they continued to steal the breath out of each other, Ranma’s grip keeping her from falling backward.

When they finally stopped the apnea contest, Ranma unceremoniously scooped her in his arms, and started carrying her like a bride.  He walked to the closest bedroom with his precious cargo, pushing the door with a foot.  Once inside he headed straight to the bed, and put her down at the foot of it; letting her stand.

“What now, Airen?” she impishly asked, hands behind her back.

“Now... I wanna see you nekkid!” he answered, badly overacting the horny teenager part.  Not that he wasn’t one, of course.

She simply chuckled in response, and let him grasp her dress at the shoulders.  He slipped the garment on the sides of her arms, baring her full, generous, braless chest.  Cologne-chan had nothing to envy to her great-granddaughter.  The breasts were large and perfectly round, with perky nipples standing proudly erect at the top of the mounds.  Ranma immediately leaned down and took one of the tits in his mouth, sucking on the pink nub and twirling his tongue around the sensitive areola.

The Chinese woman moaned from the ministrations of her Japanese lover.  She inclined her head backward, facing the ceiling, her long dark hair falling in cascade down her back.  She sighed and cooed while Ranma was ravishing her scrumptious boobs.  He switched from mammary, lavishing his attention on the neglected one, coating it with his saliva just as generously as the first.  His lips were closed around the nipple, drawing it in with a nice suction effect, his teeth even lightly nibbling the flesh.

While he was devouring the delicious bosom, his hands weren’t staying idle.  Pushing the dress down her waist, they caressed every inch of skin that was slowly bared.  The bunched gown stayed stuck for a short time at her hips, but it didn’t take long for Ranma to overcome the resistance.  The green cloth finally pooled at her feet, stripping her completely.  Since she had sworn off underwear a long time ago, out of spite over Happōsai’s actions, there were no panties on her shapely derrière to hinder the touch of her lover.

Ranma’s fingers immediately dug in the soft, pliant flesh of those ass cheeks, kneading them like dough, to Cologne-chan’s noisy approval.  The curvy half-moons were nicely shaped, firm and yet so smooth under his calloused hands, a real wonder for the pigtailed boy molesting them.  Though it was the entire bundle of sexy femaleness that excited him.

Grinding his covered crotch against her nude body, Ranma couldn’t handle it any more.  His erection was hard as stone, and it was far from receiving the stimulation it longed for.  Stepping away from her, he let the flustered woman regain her breath and her footing.  Meanwhile, he was frantically dropping the yellow-and-blue shorts.  His pride, as soon as it was freed from the confines of the cloth, sprang upward, long and straight, in all its glory.

Cologne-chan gave the purple-headed warrior an appraising look, licking her lips.  Ranma took it in hand, rubbing it slowly to ease the itching from the painful confining.  The blood circulation was quick to be restored in the phallus, if its erect state was any indication.

“Now what?” asked the woman, nude save for her slippers and headband.  She distractedly kicked her crumpled dress on a nearby chair.  She then enticingly thrust her chest forward and moved her sculptural hips, while running her hands over her naked skin.

Ranma, grinning at the display of female pulchritude, answered: “Now... I want you to get on your knees and give me one hell of a blowjob!”

“Oh... really?” she said, smiling, as she lazily strutted closer to Ranma...

... before catching him, sweeping his feet from under the unsuspecting boy and sending him flying towards the bed with a judo throw.  Ranma, caught completely by surprise, landed on his back on the mattress with a shocked “OOF!”

Before he could sit up, a slippered foot pressed against his chest and pushed him down on the bed.  Looking up, Ranma could see Cologne-chan dominating him, standing over her toy with one leg raised to pin him to the spot.  This was spreading her thighs and giving the boy a perfect view of her shaved sex, the rosy lips imperceptibly winking at him.  Despite the lewd posture, she was nonetheless looking regal and domineering, especially with the condescending smirk on her magenta lips.

“And what make you think, silly male, that you can order around a Matriarch of the Joketsuzoku?  What make you think I would demean myself by going on my knees in front of a foolish boy and fellate that pathetic worm dangling between your legs?”

Ranma’s head was still spinning a bit, but he soon recognized the game, and grinned.  Scratching his head, he searched for a worthwhile answer.  “Huuu... because you like it just as much as me?”

The prideful woman shook her head, arms crossed under her boobs (which was nicely pushing them up).  “Tsk, tsk, tsk,” she scolded, “that doesn’t excuse your earlier presumptuousness.  Now, you must make a proper apology.  If you want me to lower myself into licking and sucking that turgid, smelly, unappealing organ of yours, you must show you are ready to do the same for me.  It’s only a matter of fairness, don’t you think?”

Ranma shrugged and fatalistically nodded.  He knew he had to play by her rules if he wanted to get any pussy today.  Cologne-chan rubbed his sternum with the tip of her foot, before pushing it up under his chin.

“Lick my foot, Airen!” she commanded in a gleeful, but no-nonsense tone.

Ranma looked quizzically at the blurry shape hovering right under his nose.  He knew it could become a deadly weapon in a split-second if she chose so.  Without a word, he put a hand on top of her ankle, and removed the slipper with the other.  Once the dainty, pretty foot was in view, Ranma gently stroked it.  He kissed the big toe, then the smaller ones.  Not stopping his caresses, he began to give tentative licks to the top and the sides.  The skin was clean and nice-tasting.  His tongue strokes became longer, slowly migrating to the sole of the foot.  He was careful as to not trigger a ticklish reaction, only gently teasing the most sensitive spots.

Cologne-chan sighed, her breathing steadily increasing in pace.  Some women found the feet a genuinely erogenous zone, and she was one of them.  Ranma’s skilled mouth- and handwork were arousing her as much as if applied to many other parts of her body.  Her cheeks pink, she struggled to stay upright, as the leg supporting all her weight was starting to get wobbly.

“The other one...” she said.  First pulling back her left leg to regain her balance, she presented him her right foot.  Ranma similarly discarded the slipper and began massaging the slender extremity.  His delicate kisses, licks, strokes and rubs were again having great effect on her.  He was no doubt using some of his shiatsu knowledge to increase the sensation, too.

Glancing at his “wife”, Ranma could tell she was truly getting aroused, going as far as biting on a finger to stifle her moans.  The boy took advantage of this to suddenly pull on her leg.  Surprised, Cologne-chan waved her arms but couldn’t prevent being dragged over the bed.  She landed atop of Ranma, facing down and the opposite way.  Her chest slammed against his belly and her hips against his upper torso.  He now had her crotch above his face and her head between his legs.

“Why you...!” she protested irately.

“I’ve done what you asked.  Now it’s your turn.  Suck me off, WOMAN !”

“How dare you—AH!”

Cologne-chan’s vehement rebuke was cut short when Ranma cowardly attacked her from behind.  Imprisoning her lower body in a strong grip, his hands firmly locked on her great ass, he dived between her thighs.  His mouth clamped over the puffy, glistening lips of her vagina, already quite wet thanks to the foreplay.  His agile tongue slipped inside and wiggled between the inner labia.  It squirmed within the fleshy folds, bringing exquisite sensations to the moaning woman.

“Aaaah... Ooooh... you cheat... just wait... you’ll pay for this... Mmmmh...”

But Ranma didn’t pay any heed to her threat.  He just sucked harder, hungrily gulping the nectar that was now generously dewing from the womanly flower.  His fingers dug deeper in the soft flesh of her buttocks as he slurped noisily.  This simply increased Cologne-chan’s vocal response.  She lowered her head, mouth open in bliss... to find herself nose-to-glans with his hard prick.

She didn’t ponder for long about what to do.  Strongly desirous to reciprocate, she grabbed the rigid shaft with her small hand.  Testing the suppleness of the outer layer of skin with the tip of her fingers, she rolled it over the solid, blood-engorged tissues underneath.  Her nostrils filled with the heady smell of male arousal, she inhaled deeply.  Her deft tongue slipped between her red lips, and she licked the purple-caped mushroom.  She then went down, trailing saliva along the visible blue veins, and raining kisses over the manly tool.

Ranma stopped momentarily his thorough cunnilingus to take a deep breath.  This turned into a delighted gasp when Cologne-chan’s lips surrounded his lower head.  The warm and wet mouth closed around the turgid cock.  The suction effect brought indescribable pleasure to the young man.  More of his spicy sausage vanished into her oral cavity as she lowered her head.  The walls of her throat soon added to the sensations brought by her lips as the one-eyed monk slid past her tonsils.

Ranma groaned, the back of his head digging into the cushions as he tensed.  “Yeah... that’s more like it... I knew you could do it if you tried....”

Before his lover could empty her mouth and retort something harsh, the pigtailed boy traitorously struck again.  Inserting a finger into her well-lubricated twat, he brought her to distraction by pumping it gently.  At the same time, his tongue went to work on her exposed clitoris, flicking the tip around the oversensitive nub and sucking it with his mouth.

Cologne-chan’s eyes shot open, and she involuntarily swallowed more of his prick than she intended.  Despite a muffled grunt, though, she didn’t gag.  She had many years of experience in giving blowjobs, she wasn’t easy to caught unaware.  Instead, she alternated between engulfing the whole meat and leaving only the tip surrounded by her lips, enthusiastically increasing the pace of the bobbing of her head around this staff.  Slick and glistening with drool every time it was exposed to air, the throbbing organ began to swell in preparation for the incoming eruption.  Pre-cum oozing from the pee hole landed on the tongue of the raunchy woman, and she drank it eagerly.

Ranma was dutifully doing his part of the sixty-nine, greedily eating her out.  It had become a contest of who would bring the other to the edge first.  Although he knew he didn’t stand much chance against his amazingly experienced lover, the competitive boy was nonetheless trying with all his might.  He frantically licked, lapped, sucked, kissed her delicious cunny, gorging himself with the tasty juices.  He mercilessly teased her clit with his tongue and lips, at any time he could divest them from her twat.  He didn’t leave her tender holes empty for any length of time, though, immediately replacing oral sex by some finger-fucking when this happened.  Two digits were easily slipping in the warm folds of her gushing vagina, and another one wiggled in her tight anus — as to not play favorite.

This wasn’t enough to make Cologne-chan lose her focus, though.  Vacuuming his painfully needy cock, she was squeezing an orgasm out of it pretty quickly.  When Ranma let out an unarticulated growl, a fountain of hot, thick, gooey stuff erupted in her mouth.  Not letting any droplet leak past her lips, she swallowed systematically each spurt of salty semen he shot in her throat.  The gorgeous, blue-haired woman milked her “husband” for everything he was worth.  She didn’t let go of the manly hose until it had somewhat deflated, and wasn’t any longer offering its highly nourishing protein meal .

Ranma, lying flat on his back and panting, had stopped pinning Cologne-chan’s curvy body against his own, and didn’t react when she rolled from him.  Swapping position, she lay down on her side next to Ranma, now facing him, a hand supporting her chin.  The other wandered to his softened shaft and idly stroked it.

“So soon...?  I’m a little disappointed, Airen.  Is that all the staying power you have?  Has my training be wasted on you?”

Ranma sighed.  The touch of her fingers on his member, and her warm body pressing against his were very nice, but her words were stinging, as usual.  “Hey, you know it’s always like that the first time.  But it’s a good thing, too.  It means I will last longer once inside your hot, tight cunt!”

While talking, Ranma’s hand reached for her hip and started stroking her backside.  She purred in response to this, but nonetheless asked: “Ho?  And what make you think I’ll let you sink your pitiful manhood in my sacred vessel?  Especially after your poor performance and disrespectful attitude?”

“This.” Ranma simply answered, his hand leaving her ass to slip between her thighs and palm her Venus mons.  She gasped cutely as her partner fingered her wet slit.  “You haven’t cum yet...” the cocky youth continued.  “I know how it feels.  You won’t take it much longer.  You need a hard, thick log in there...”

“But where to find one...” she teased...  “AAH!” ... until she gasped from the light pinch that her student in the carnal arts just gave to her clitoris.  She contemplated getting mad at him, but it would be counterproductive.  He was right, after all, she really longed for a good screwing.  And from the solid feel under her fingers, still wrapped around his mast, he was already back to full hardness.  “Mmmmh... seems like I’ll have to do with this.”

Cologne-chan pushed herself up, regally whipping the long hairs that fell onto her face.  She straddled his hips, knees on either side of his waist, and crouched above his purple-tipped rocket.  “But remember one thing, Airen...” she added while lowering herself and aiming his prick at her yearning sex.  “I’m the one staying on top here!”

Then, with a swift push down, she sheathed his sword in her warm, snug scabbard.  She immediately let out a guiltless yowl of rapture, throwing her head backward.  Ranma exhaled lengthily from the wondrous feeling of having his manly weapon entirely encased in womanly flesh.  Her enticing, bouncy breasts caught his eyes, and both his hands palmed the large melons, sending their gainaxing to a sudden halt with his playful groping.

 

What followed was a marathon of enthusiastic coital activities.  Cologne-chan rode for a while her favorite stallion, the “Amazon” bouncing up and down on his horsehood, cooing in delight while his hands roamed from her boobs to her hips.  But before too long, they were changing position.

 

The seriousness of her demand to be on top all the time was soon crumbling as Ranma pushed her on her back.  He lifted one of her slim legs, which shifted Cologne-chan on her side, and kneeled around the other thigh.  He then pressed the uplifted leg against his front while his dick pumped into her pussy.  Her beautiful, flushing body was shaking rhythmically with his thrusts as she started singing her orgasmic song.

 

All pretenses were flying by the window when Ranma got her on her elbows and knees and began shafting her from behind.  His hands were on her hips, his pelvis was slapping repeatedly her upturned ass, and his balls were flinging against her clit with each sway.  The proud Matriarch of the Joketsuzoku was taking being fucked doggy-style with good spirits, if her shameless howls of ecstasy were any indication.

 

Nor did she mind being sprawled on her back, her bottom at the edge of the bed and her legs spread in a vertical “V”.  His hands holding them behind each knee, Ranma was kneeling on the floor.  Grunting, he used this easy access to plunge his wang again and again into her sloshing Chinese snatch.  This way, he could watch her pretty face contorting in bliss and her sweaty frame rocking with the tremors.

 

Next, Cologne-chan found herself with her back pressed against the wall of the bedroom.  Ranma, standing between her legs, was pinning her good and supporting her weight with a hand under each thigh.  Her arms, circling his shoulders, were hugging her lover tightly while he pounded and pounded into her like a jackhammer.  When her mouth wasn’t busy from kissing, she was moaning and gasping and crying and vocalizing non-stop her joy.

 

The swollen, reddish labia were driven up and down, sliding around the thick, immobile phallus; its girth was obscenely stretching the vaginal opening; mixed juices were dripping out of it, abundantly coating the magic rod as it was doing its vanishing trick.  Ranma was sitting cross-legged on the bed, Cologne-chan facing away from him above his lap.  He was holding the sexy woman under her haunches, lifting her naughty bottom then lowering it again to skewer her burning tunnel of love.

 

They carried on with many other erotic positions from the Kama Sutra, as well as some exotic ones that would be quite impossible for many couples unless they were gifted with unnatural flexibility.  Using various bodily configurations, they brought each other to repeated orgasms through friction of their linked genitals and other sexual stimulation.

Ranma had already squirted several times in her hot sex, liberally filling her womb with his life-giving seed.  Secret Joketsuzoku shiatsu techniques were used to bring him back to readiness every time, allowing them another round of hot lovemaking.  Cologne-chan had lost count of her own climaxes, a pleasurable haze of bliss having clouded her mind after the first dozen.

 

Once they were both too tired to go on with the most strenuous exercises, they settled for lying side-by-side on the very rumpled bed.  Ranma’s front was molding Cologne-chan’s back, and the boy had his still lively penis deeply imbedded in her tight anus.  He was making some slow thrusts with his hips, lazily sodomizing her snug, firm ass.  She responded to it occasionally with soft coos and cute sighs.  He was tenderly caressing her hair, and she half-turned and craned her neck to kiss him.

“Wo da Airen... Wo ai ni...” she whispered.